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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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gumcuzzler

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gumcuzzler
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 7024
  • Number of comments : 28
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About gumcuzzler : you fucking stalkers stop looking at my page

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gumcuzzler's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house while his plumbing was being redone. I really had to pee, but the toilet wasn't working, so I peed in his cat's litterbox. His cat got defensive, and started attacking me while I peed. My boyfriend walked in and saw the whole thing. FML

#4639027 (197)

I agree, your life sucks (10213) - you deserved it (47757)

On 08/18/2009 at 9:13pm - love - by litterbox_girl (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my 250 lb ex-Marine dad announced he was going to start randomly punching me in the crotch, without warning, to "improve my reflexes." FML

#4235904 (275)

I agree, your life sucks (52650) - you deserved it (3716)

On 08/02/2009 at 6:45pm - health - by theregoesmyspermcount (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I brought my dog to the vet for a routine surgery. The vets assured me that no dog had ever died during this procedure. Apparently my dog was the first. FML

#1188272 (178)

I agree, your life sucks (86205) - you deserved it (2542)

On 04/21/2009 at 9:48am - animals - by lylethomes15 (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, I was going down on my girlfriend when I noticed a hickey near her hip. I said, "wow, last night was crazy, I don't even remember doing that!". Without even interrupting the action, she simply said, "You didn't". FML

#640926 (109)

I agree, your life sucks (78336) - you deserved it (4278)

On 03/27/2009 at 10:13am - intimacy - by tehhotness (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I walked behind a girl I hooked up with last weekend while she was on the computer in the library. I noticed she was looking at my facebook page and got excited. Then I heard her say to her friend, "This is the one smallest penis I have ever seen." FML

#273753 (119)

I agree, your life sucks (58355) - you deserved it (6757)

On 03/11/2009 at 4:29pm - intimacy - by Noname (man) - United States (New York)