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guineagirl

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guineagirl

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2386
  • Number of comments : 51
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About guineagirl : note to self my mother is the bringer of death

guineagirl's page activity

Visits<b>Memma</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 3:16pm<b>konstantinos616</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 5:45pm<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 8:02pm<b>Aquamarine9</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 11:50pm<b>fallencastiel</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 9:21pm<b>dudecall</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 8:52pm<b>CobraLazerFace</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 5:52pm<b>blazerman</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 5:44pm<b>Toughsky</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 10:15pm<b>miketopgunmike1</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 8:14pm<b>loathingloser</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 10:54am<b>ally_sanderson</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 11:20pm<b>cyzn</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 12:10am<b>YouMadBra</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 5:43pm<b>leeleeamber</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 3:45am<b>masyn_rae</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 2:54am<b>JensenAckles</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 5:37pm<b>lulumoongirl</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 1:16am

guineagirl's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of guineagirl's badges

guineagirl's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that my wife was having sex with my friend. It turned out that my genius cat realized it wasn't me there and attacked his balls, severely cutting them. I now have to kill my cat and pay for his medical bills to sew his balls back. FML

#14512160
458 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68517) - you deserved it (3648)

On 01/08/2011 at 8:11pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend told me there was a tick on my shoulder and that he would remove it so I shouldn't worry. After about a half hour, lots of blood, and a ton of pain, he told me it was just a mole. FML

#14451533
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29982) - you deserved it (4442)

On 01/03/2011 at 2:50pm - health - by anonymous - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I put on a lacy dress with nothing underneath and walked nonchalantly into the living room. My husband took one look at me, let out a heavy sigh and said "right now?" FML

#14448296
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34642) - you deserved it (4366)

On 01/03/2011 at 3:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was in the elevator with my female coworker and a very attractive teen in front of us. My coworker reached out and grabbed the boobs of the teen in front of us, and blamed it on me. I got yelled at, kneed in the crotch, and punched in the face. My coworker couldn't stop laughing. FML

#14416914
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33263) - you deserved it (3394)

On 01/01/2011 at 12:06am - work - by Chris - United States (Illinois)

Today, while lying in bed with my fiancé, we were talking about how we'd rather die, if given a choice. I said, "I want to die in my sleep next to you." His response? "It'd be sexier if you were on top of me with your face between my legs." Cute, honey. FML

#14409774
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25093) - you deserved it (5895)

On 12/31/2010 at 2:21pm - intimacy - by legwarmer (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I was giving myself a breast exam for lumps. I heard laughing, looked around and saw that the 12 year-old neighbor and his friends were watching through the window. FML

#14374773
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23743) - you deserved it (10893)

On 12/28/2010 at 10:20pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my friend compared my hair color to hers. Also, she braided my hair (two pieces) with hers (one piece). I asked her why and she finally broke down and told me. She has lice and didn't want to be the only one. FML

#14342949
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55423) - you deserved it (4236)

On 12/26/2010 at 3:12am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I rented a copy How To Train Your Dragon for my young son to watch. I put the DVD in, hit play without paying attention, and went off to make lunch. A few minutes later, my son ran into the kitchen screaming. Apparently, there was a mix up at the rental store and I got a copy of Saw IV. FML

#14337359
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38044) - you deserved it (10289)

On 12/25/2010 at 6:21pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was naked on top of my boyfriend looking lovingly into his eyes. He then started to use my boobs as punching bags while singing "Eye of the Tiger". FML

#14305984
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40061) - you deserved it (8576)

On 12/23/2010 at 1:36am - intimacy - by nemo518 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, a woman came to my counter and ordered 12 donuts. I said, "OK sure, a dozen donuts." She paused, looked at me with disgust and yelled, "I said 12, NOT a dozen." FML

#14277072
296 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44745) - you deserved it (3616)

On 12/20/2010 at 8:52pm - work - by morenita27 (woman) - Canada

Today, my last remaining pet, a hamster, died. Even he thinks it's better to drown in his water dish than brave the world living with me. FML

#14261370
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24621) - you deserved it (6408)

On 12/19/2010 at 3:51pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I saw Saw IV with my boyfriend. He held me close and said, "I'll protect you." A few seconds later, he jumped up so violently, he gave me a bloody nose, and ran screaming out of the room. FML

#14248345
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29628) - you deserved it (3425)

On 12/18/2010 at 2:14pm - love - by asdfghjkl (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I found out what sound a hammer makes when it strikes the back of my hand. FML

#14220406
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25096) - you deserved it (5415)

On 12/16/2010 at 1:32am - health - by nukebroadcast - United States (Nevada)

Today, whilst pleasuring myself in my bedroom, I began absent-mindedly staring at a spider on the ceiling. It wasn't until the point of climax that I realised that I was, in effect, masturbating over a spider. FML

#14205128
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23581) - you deserved it (20495)

On 12/14/2010 at 7:00pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Gloucestershire)

Today, I met my boyfriend's very strict and traditional Korean parents. I had to listen to them while they called me a skank and how I was fat and ugly compared to nice, pretty, Korean girls. They don't know I speak Korean. FML

#14184009
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46647) - you deserved it (3025)

On 12/12/2010 at 10:03pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Korea Republic of (Seoul-t'ukpyolsi)



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