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guineagirl

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guineagirl

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2652
  • Number of comments : 51
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About guineagirl : note to self my mother is the bringer of death

guineagirl's page activity

Visits<b>Memma</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 3:16pm<b>konstantinos616</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 5:45pm<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 8:02pm<b>Aquamarine9</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 11:50pm<b>fallencastiel</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 9:21pm<b>dudecall</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 8:52pm<b>CobraLazerFace</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 5:52pm<b>blazerman</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 5:44pm<b>Toughsky</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 10:15pm<b>miketopgunmike1</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 8:14pm<b>loathingloser</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 10:54am<b>ally_sanderson</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 11:20pm<b>cyzn</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 12:10am<b>YouMadBra</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 5:43pm<b>leeleeamber</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 3:45am<b>masyn_rae</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 2:54am<b>JensenAckles</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 5:37pm<b>lulumoongirl</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 1:16am

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Socialite

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An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

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guineagirl's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that when you kick another man in the snowglobes and he smiles at you, there's something creepily wrong. FML

#17292941
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32458) - you deserved it (6557)

On 07/29/2011 at 12:20am - intimacy - by FML (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, a bunch of guys at work chased me down a corridor with a Febreze spray for smelling like I'd been "sleeping in a hollowed-out horse's carcass" and having "the personal hygiene of a billy goat." FML

#17283766
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8928) - you deserved it (50527)

On 07/28/2011 at 4:15am - work - by Champion the wonder horse - United States

Today, I learned that my daughter's gerbils are not afraid of the vacuum cleaner. FML

#17279585
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26768) - you deserved it (9478)

On 07/27/2011 at 2:09pm - kids - by corasmom (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was dared to eat durian. With my reputation hanging in the balance, I bought one. Only after I opened it did I realize the extent of the dare. It smelled and tasted like dried cat shit that Satan himself had regurgitated. FML

#17243352
363 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10410) - you deserved it (32036)

On 07/24/2011 at 5:01pm - misc - by cadillacfrank - United States

Today, I walked in on my mom and her friends comparing the differences in their nipples. FML

#17211099
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36010) - you deserved it (3698)

On 07/22/2011 at 12:11am - misc - by oliverP123 - United States (New York)

Today, after watching Insidious, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to scare me while I was on the toilet. I was in mid-piss when he jumped out at me, and I ran screaming and peeing down the hall. FML

#17206347
354 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41008) - you deserved it (10103)

On 07/21/2011 at 5:24pm - love - by toni405 - United States

Today, I went over to my girlfriend's house to meet her entire family for the first time. Trying not to be rude, I ate their 12-bean and chorizo soup. Now I'm stuck in the bathroom trying to unclog the toilet with no plunger. FML

#17177083
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37421) - you deserved it (4715)

On 07/19/2011 at 1:11pm - misc - by PissNTra - United States

Today, I woke up to a scream downstairs. My 13 year-old daughter was trying to bite her little brother's neck. No matter how hard I try, she will not believe that she is NOT and NEVER WILL BE a vampire. FML

#17162129
469 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38091) - you deserved it (5694)

On 07/18/2011 at 11:17am - kids - by xBubbles38 - United States

Today, my child was refusing to leave the playground. I had to pry her, screaming and crying, from the monkey bars. I then realized I had been assaulting someone else's kid. FML

#17113139
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14485) - you deserved it (63471)

On 07/14/2011 at 9:51pm - kids - by anon (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my girlfriend, who is very self conscious about her body, finally decided to have sex with me. She told me to wait a few minutes, so I did. I stripped and turned around to find her in a one-piece swimsuit, with a hole cut out of the crotch. FML

#17088739
429 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73612) - you deserved it (7678)

On 07/13/2011 at 1:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my 16 year-old daughter tried to convince me that tampons don't actually work, all because she can still pee with one in. FML

#17069716
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31879) - you deserved it (5179)

On 07/11/2011 at 6:23pm - misc - by Username - United States (Washington)

Today, I got a text message from my ex from about a year ago, asking if my 4-day-old son was his. I don't know what's sadder - the fact that he thinks a gestation period can last 11 months, or that he's more willing to step up to the plate than the baby's actual father. FML

#17061004
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29191) - you deserved it (8377)

On 07/11/2011 at 12:48am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, after spending 6 months and $15,000 on lawyer fees at my 13 year old son's request, his abusive, alcoholic father no longer has any legal right to see him. How did my son repay me? He ran away to live with his father the very first time I told him he couldn't have friends sleep over. FML

#17057009
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41487) - you deserved it (7009)

On 07/10/2011 at 8:01pm - kids - by tomcat69 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I peeked through my window and trained a pair of binoculars on my neighbour's house. Every night without fail, he ends up standing in front of his window topless to flex his muscles. This time, I was surprised to instead find a note taped to the window saying, "Sorry, I'm out tonight." FML

#17032745
375 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10439) - you deserved it (75521) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 07/08/2011 at 8:11pm - love - by Anonyme - Sent from mobile version

Today, after running a couple of miles, I went upstairs into my air-conditioned room to cool off. Apparently, my mom walked past my room and heard me breathing heavily. Later, she had my dad give me a talk about masturbation. FML

#17022194
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34428) - you deserved it (3038)

On 07/08/2011 at 12:20am - intimacy - by chumleevil - United States (Maine)



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