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guineagirl

Offline (the 04/27/2014 at 7:30pm) | Search for a member

guineagirl

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1514
  • Number of comments : 50
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About guineagirl : note to self my mother is the bringer of death

guineagirl's page activity

Visits<b>miketopgunmike1</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 8:14pm<b>loathingloser</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 10:54am<b>ally_sanderson</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 11:20pm<b>cyzn</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 12:10am<b>YouMadBra</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 5:43pm<b>leeleeamber</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 3:45am<b>masyn_rae</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 2:54am<b>JensenAckles</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 5:37pm<b>lulumoongirl</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 1:16am<b>hehfbdjc</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 10:50pm<b>hellnosucka</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 4:24am<b>crowsemen</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 1:51am<b>omnia</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 3:17pm<b>jordyn_marie</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 11:58am<b>fooomanchiu</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 10:59am<b>cariboucrow</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 7:50am<b>Donkness</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 7:33am<b>RecklessLove</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 3:52am

guineagirl's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of guineagirl's badges

guineagirl's favorite FMLs

Today, my nineteen year old daughter handed me a book on raising children and said "Maybe you'll do better next time." FML

#21169808
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46044) - you deserved it (14770)

On 06/10/2014 at 4:06pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Barbados (Saint Michael)

Today, after having asked me out on Monday, the guy I like angrily cancelled our date because I "hadn't bothered" even talking to him for "several days". One day. You didn't hear from me on Monday. It's now Tuesday. That's one day, dick. FML

#21169704
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45733) - you deserved it (6140)

On 06/10/2014 at 2:29pm - love - by fartbucket51995129565 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I sent my girlfriend a request to confirm our relationship on Facebook. She accepted, then changed her screen name into "His Hand". FML

#21169063
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50295) - you deserved it (10869)

On 06/10/2014 at 12:02am - love - by MiserableMan (man) - Vietnam (Ho Chi Minh)

Today, I realized how bad my sex life is when I scratched a mosquito bite and almost had an orgasm. FML

#21168837
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44168) - you deserved it (8374)

On 06/09/2014 at 10:14pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I ran into my girlfriend by chance while out shopping. She looked different than usual. Maybe it was the wedding ring she was wearing, or how she had her arm around another gentleman, gee, I don't know. That's two years of my life wasted. FML

#21168433
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61891) - you deserved it (5030)

On 06/09/2014 at 5:03pm - love - by wrecked (man) - United States

Today, I put my headphones on and laid down to relax to some music. I fell asleep, and woke up later to a police officer busting into my house. My neighbor had been knocking on my door, then looked through my window and saw me on my couch, and was convinced I'd died. FML

#21168349
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49220) - you deserved it (4814)

On 06/09/2014 at 3:37pm - misc - by I'm Not Dead Yet - United States (Arizona)

Today, I broke my nose trying to pop a zit. FML

#21168348
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43970) - you deserved it (19876)

On 06/09/2014 at 3:36pm - health - by blanknameisblank (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I clogged the only toilet at work. Thinking I could escape and blame someone else, I opened the door, only to see a line of people waiting outside. FML

#21168163
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43224) - you deserved it (15523)

On 06/09/2014 at 12:28pm - work - by deservedly - Canada (Alberta)

Today, some alarm, somewhere in my house, is making a low battery noise. I've checked every smoke detector multiple times, and I can't find it. It has been hours. I'm not sure if its still doing it or if the sound has just invaded my brain. FML

Today, at my all-night senior party, I was talking to the blind girl who I haven't had classes with since 9th grade. I unthinkingly opened the conversation with "Nice to see you again." FML

#21167586
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37866) - you deserved it (8897)

On 06/08/2014 at 10:17pm - misc - by It'd be nice to see you too. - United States (Minnesota)

Today, some pig slapped my ass as he passed me in the street, then looked back at me with a dirty grin. His grin turned to horror when he realized that I'm actually a guy, then to anger as he bitched me out for "tricking" him by "looking like a chick". FML

#21167190
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56166) - you deserved it (6779)

On 06/08/2014 at 2:32pm - misc - by 404: sense not found (man) - United States (California)

Today, I woke up to my boyfriend shrieking at the top of his lungs. I ran into the dining room where he was, to find him standing on the table screaming "Kill it!" while pointing at an unmoving spider the size of a Tic Tac on the wall. FML

#21167015
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43370) - you deserved it (6211)

On 06/08/2014 at 11:10am - love - by eightleggedtictac - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I went to the restroom to pee. A loud fart exploded out of my ass and echoed in the toilet bowl. I could practically feel my face on fire when I saw the horrified look on a little girl's face as I walked out. FML

#21166563
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43042) - you deserved it (6102)

On 06/07/2014 at 10:34pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, at college, I was frantically trying to finish an essay on gay rights that was due less than an hour later. In the end I failed, because the college internet filters kept classifying every single page containing the information I needed as "sex", and blocked it all. FML

#21166210
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37378) - you deserved it (13278)

On 06/07/2014 at 3:16pm - work - by fstfckd (man) - United States

Today, my brain decided to go into suicide mode. So far I've managed to open a fridge door into my face, walk balls-first into the corner of a table, and sliced my finger while trying to cut open some thick plastic packaging with scissors. I'll probably be dead by the time this is posted. FML

#21165186
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47029) - you deserved it (5435)

On 06/06/2014 at 5:26pm - health - by FMyBrain (man) - United States (Alaska)



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