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guineagirl

Offline (the 01/01/2015 at 8:32pm) | Search for a member

guineagirl

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 6980
  • Number of comments : 53
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About guineagirl : note to self my mother is the bringer of death

guineagirl's page activity

Visits<b>j_mitchell25</b> - the 01/15/2015 at 11:41am<b>Raath00</b> - the 01/15/2015 at 1:01am<b>FoxHunt9119</b> - the 12/28/2014 at 7:58pm<b>1Nsan3</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 12:59am<b>nunes36</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 5:42pm<b>PyroSam</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 2:46pm<b>gingerrrrrr</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 8:21pm<b>qwerty401</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 3:08pm<b>Memma</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 3:16pm<b>konstantinos616</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 5:45pm<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 8:02pm<b>Aquamarine9</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 11:50pm<b>fallencastiel</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 9:21pm<b>dudecall</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 8:52pm<b>CobraLazerFace</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 5:52pm<b>blazerman</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 5:44pm<b>Toughsky</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 10:15pm<b>miketopgunmike1</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 8:14pm

Liked!<b>Raath00</b> - the 11/13/2014 at 2:16am

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An insomniac or a creature of the dark

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guineagirl's favorite FMLs

Today, during a moment of silence in front of the entire high school during my band concert, I managed to hit the stand with my flute, and loudly scrambled to catch it before it fell over. I've never had so many people look at me. FML

#21309681
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25876) - you deserved it (3125)

On 12/01/2014 at 9:06pm - misc - by Silverfeathery -

Today, my mom found my dildo, and got so angry that she beat me with it. FML

#21309415
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45472) - you deserved it (11764)

On 12/01/2014 at 12:55pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I realized my anger management has hit a new low when I screamed at a goose for being a goose. FML

#21309384
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27767) - you deserved it (7512)

On 12/01/2014 at 11:38am - misc - by WickedLittleDoll - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my husband shaved off his beard. Turns out he looks like my ex. FML

Today, I dug out the 5 fancy, extremely expensive candles I bought during Black Friday. I lit one up, and was delighted that it smelled so great. My mother then walked into my room and stated that it smelled "like shit". The other four were going to be a Christmas gift for her. FML

#21309261
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29718) - you deserved it (2984)

On 12/01/2014 at 2:30am - money - by shitty candles - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend bought me some feminine cleansing wipes for my birthday so I could, "get the hoo-ha spick-and-span." FML

#21309102
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33225) - you deserved it (5762)

On 11/30/2014 at 10:32pm - intimacy - by fishtacos (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I sat down for a poop. The toilet seat slid off immediately, taking me with it. I lay on the bathroom floor for several moments stunned, still pooping. FML

#21308801
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32823) - you deserved it (4231)

On 11/30/2014 at 2:32pm - misc - by pooplife - United Kingdom (Nottingham)

Today, my only child introduced his new girlfriend to me. He is 36 and has no children. She is 46 and has a pregnant daughter who she is very close with. I don't know if I'll ever be a grandfather, but in any case, my son is going to be one before me. FML

#21308718
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28311) - you deserved it (2294)

On 11/30/2014 at 12:29pm - kids - by Greatgrandpa (man) - Curacao

Today, my wife was giving me a blowjob when I foolishly asked her how she got so good at giving them. She looked straight into my eyes and replied, "Practising on about six guys before you." FML

#21308641
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30954) - you deserved it (18125)

On 11/30/2014 at 8:07am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my little sister asked if she could play on my laptop, but I said no because I was writing an essay for school. She then bit herself hard and showed the mark to our parents, saying I did it. As they bitched me out, my sister got on my laptop and deleted my half-finished essay. FML

#21308491
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40605) - you deserved it (2566)

On 11/30/2014 at 12:48am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my mom told me that her vagina is "as cute today as it was twenty years ago." FML

#21308358
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29082) - you deserved it (2646)

On 11/29/2014 at 9:06pm - misc - by justawallflower - United States (Ohio)

Today, after a huge fight, my girlfriend started coming onto me. I thought it was actual make-up sex and went along with it. It was great, until she suddenly shoved me off her just as I was almost ready to come. She smugly announced she was dumping me, got dressed, then left. FML

#21308219
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36247) - you deserved it (5858)

On 11/29/2014 at 4:08pm - intimacy - by blueballed (man) - Germany (Schleswig-Holstein)

Today, I had to explain to a customer that 50% off a $50 item did not make the item free. FML

#21307823
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38078) - you deserved it (2500)

On 11/28/2014 at 10:36pm - misc - by idiots - United States (Texas)

Today, and for the past few days, there is a musical box stuck somewhere in my attic that randomly plays Christmas songs. FML

Today, I came home after doing some Black Friday shopping for Christmas presents. I told my husband I got the must-have toy our daughter has been dying for. As soon as I said it, I heard squealing and turned around to see her standing right behind me. There goes the surprise. FML

#21307526
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29005) - you deserved it (11895)

On 11/28/2014 at 1:07pm - kids - by Ruinedchristmas (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)



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