Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

groovy579

Online | Search for a member

groovy579

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 14831
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 33 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

groovy579's page activity

Visits<b>Mossygirl357</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 1:23am<b>ShadowlessSpear</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 10:31pm<b>OMG_ZOMBIES</b> - the 02/13/2015 at 2:36pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 02/09/2015 at 10:29pm<b>RaspberryFlower</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 11:28am<b>Blake9250</b> - the 01/14/2015 at 7:48am<b>stuckintime</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 10:06pm<b>Puffpie</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 12:53pm<b>midnight_tiger</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 3:41pm<b>hduebdo</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 7:07pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 11/13/2014 at 9:31pm<b>NicholausB</b> - the 11/10/2014 at 4:26pm<b>EmmaMK</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 11:15am<b>sdroze1389</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 6:09am<b>Texasblackboots</b> - the 10/29/2014 at 9:46pm<b>WolfyGrace</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 5:36am<b>Kruitdamp</b> - the 10/01/2014 at 5:39pm<b>kelseythompson</b> - the 10/01/2014 at 5:45am

Liked!<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 4:28am

groovy579's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of groovy579's badges

groovy579's favorite FMLs

Today, my obsession with saying "your mom" reached a new level when my anatomy teacher asked what I did with my pencil. FML

#21108224
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19484) - you deserved it (45000)

On 04/09/2014 at 1:17am - misc - by Motha - United States (Utah)

Today, my in-laws moved in. FML

#21107985
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63414) - you deserved it (5847)

On 04/08/2014 at 9:42pm - misc - by Great (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I realized how boring and sexually deprived my life is when I found a gas station ten cents cheaper than the one I usually use. It gave me both an asthma attack and an erection, simultaneously. FML

#21107421
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42908) - you deserved it (6255)

On 04/08/2014 at 3:56am - misc - by the long distance guy - United States (Connecticut)

Today, things were getting heated with the girlfriend. We were mostly naked, but mostly wouldn't do, so I kissed her deeply and whispered into her ear, "You should lose some weight". Clothes. I meant to say clothes. FML

Today, I was being shown how to use a nail gun while applying for a job at a construction company. The instructor shot me in the arm with it. I didn't even get the job. FML

#21107174
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45016) - you deserved it (3155)

On 04/07/2014 at 10:13pm - work - by watch_corn_dance - United States (Illinois)

Today, while on a first date, I had to excuse myself to the restroom. I was still tired from pulling an all-nighter, and fell asleep on the toilet. When I woke up and rushed back out, my date was gone. Everyone now thinks I'm an arsehole who pulled the old "window escape" trick on her. FML

#21106078
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42687) - you deserved it (12467)

On 04/06/2014 at 5:07pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I witnessed my psycho neighbor put her cat in a cage, cross into my backyard, and set the cage down before returning to her house. She then called the cops and claimed I'd stolen her cat. The cops didn't believe my side of the story for a second. FML

#21106030
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45472) - you deserved it (3070)

On 04/06/2014 at 3:37pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, I found out that my three closest online friends are the same person: my obsessive ex. I met all three before he and I even started dating. FML

#21105963
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41150) - you deserved it (5299)

On 04/06/2014 at 2:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend wanted me to get a shirt saying "I'm a girl," just so people won't think he's gay. FML

#21104753
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37742) - you deserved it (5438)

On 04/04/2014 at 9:57pm - misc - by Violet (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, my phone rang just seconds after I left a conference meeting to go use the restroom. It wouldn't have been a problem, except it seems one of my friends thought it would be funny to change my ringtone to a woman having an orgasm. FML

#21104664
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37440) - you deserved it (4383)

On 04/04/2014 at 7:46pm - work - by King_of_hearts (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I met a really nice girl at a club, and we went back to my place. I was finally going to lose my virginity, but just as she started kissing me, I panicked and ended up fainting. When I came to, I was still clothed, and she was long gone. FML

#21104650
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39517) - you deserved it (11863)

On 04/04/2014 at 7:20pm - love - by ohai ur hawt, wanna fuzzzZzZZzzZzz (man) - Mexico (Distrito Federal)

Today, my mom visited, and I left her for a few minutes while I used the bathroom. While I was stuck taking a crap, she went on one of her religious rants, telling my children that Easter was off this year because their precious "pagan" Easter Bunny had been murdered. FML

#21104621
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35976) - you deserved it (3627)

On 04/04/2014 at 6:38pm - misc - by kaheera4 (woman) - United States

Today, I got up early in the morning to get a snack, only to walk in on my "vegan" housemate eating a turkey sandwich. This bastard harasses me every other day about my meat-eating, but all he could do after he noticed me was drop the sandwich and claim he'd been sleepwalking. FML

#21104594
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39369) - you deserved it (3209)

On 04/04/2014 at 6:07pm - misc - by fuck you with a bacon cock (man) - United Kingdom (Moray)

Today, my coworkers continued their new favorite game: staring at me in total unnerving silence. I can't help but be reminded of serial killers. FML

#21103796
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32293) - you deserved it (3038)

On 04/03/2014 at 4:53pm - work - by Welshite - United States

Today, my mom brought her sleazy boyfriend home. He took one look at me, swatted my ass, and said, "It runs in the family." My mom just laughed and winked at me, and mouthed, "He's a keeper!" FML

#21103666
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56893) - you deserved it (3938)

On 04/03/2014 at 1:22pm - love - by wiona (woman) - United States (Connecticut)



Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML
  • Madonna must be the only person breathing a sigh of relief right now thanks to all the idiots arguing about the colour of a dress. Thanks to a badly-lit photograph, everyone seems to have forgotten that she super…

Friday 27 February 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: