groovy579

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Offline (the 09/22/2015 at 10:18pm)

groovy579

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 33716
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 34 posted

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groovy579's page activity

Visits<b>CLLopez</b> - the 12/02/2015 at 11:58pm<b>RealSuperSand</b> - the 05/24/2015 at 11:28pm<b>WellThatWasRude</b> - the 05/24/2015 at 9:53pm<b>Monday_funday</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 7:19pm<b>tamesenicole</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 10:31pm<b>Mossygirl357</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 1:23am<b>ShadowlessSpear</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 10:31pm<b>OMG_ZOMBIES</b> - the 02/13/2015 at 2:36pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 02/09/2015 at 10:29pm<b>RaspberryFlower</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 11:28am<b>Blake9250</b> - the 01/14/2015 at 7:48am<b>stuckintime</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 10:06pm<b>Puffpie</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 12:53pm<b>midnight_tiger</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 3:41pm<b>hduebdo</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 7:07pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 11/13/2014 at 9:31pm<b>NicholausB</b> - the 11/10/2014 at 4:26pm<b>EmmaMK</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 11:15am

Fucked!<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 4:28am

groovy579's FML badges

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of groovy579's badges

groovy579's favorite FMLs

Today, my dog ran away. I looked for him for 5 hours, and when I came back home, he was waiting for me at the door. FML

by dBLIZZARD / 06/09/2015 at 2:39pm / United States / Animals

Today, I went on my very first date. We went out to eat dinner and everything went great! Afterwards, I went to drop him back off at his house. I backed out of his driveway and got stuck in a ditch. His dad had to come out and tow me out. So that's how I met my boyfriend's parents. FML

by firstdategoals / 06/07/2015 at 11:35pm / United States / Transportation

Today, I lost my virginity. He then told me, in tears, how bad he felt about leaving his dog alone for the night. FML

by Anonymous / 06/07/2015 at 12:21am / New Zealand (Gisborne) / Intimacy

Today, I moved in with my boyfriend because my parents kicked me out. He said that if I ever touch his "fucking apple jacks" he will "chop" my nipples off and feed them to the dog. FML

by CassidyQueen / 06/05/2015 at 10:14pm / United States (Missouri) / Love

Today, during jury duty, the shitbag who's accused of capital murder in our trial took the stand. The prosecution made him look like a total idiot. He got more and more flustered and eventually screamed at us that he'll have us killed if we find him guilty. I believe him. FML

by Anonymous / 06/05/2015 at 2:05pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, for the first time since kindergarten, I won! I came first! Yes, I'm first on the waiting list for the M.A. degree I applied to. FML

by winneuse / 06/04/2015 at 10:30pm / Miscellaneous

Today, I told my boyfriend I was horny and was waiting for him at my place. 30 minutes later, he still hadn't arrived, so I called him and asked if he was coming. He replied "Already did, right into a kleenex." and hung up. FML

by Anonymous / 06/04/2015 at 8:26am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I overheard my wife telling my mother-in-law I was diagnosed with a learning disability earlier this week. She replied, "I always knew he was a retard. Why did you ever marry that idiot?" All my wife did was mutter "I don't know." FML

by Anonymous / 06/04/2015 at 5:08am / Maldives (Maale) / Miscellaneous

Today, when leaving my apartment, I instantly noticed there was a giant dump truck in our lot, which turned out to be directly behind my car. After making a 20-point escape from my parking space and getting to work late, my roommate texts me "DUDE guess what I got last night". A giant dump truck. FML

by dump truck hater / 06/03/2015 at 12:18pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I made a nursing home resident laugh so hard that he had a heart attack. FML

by Anonymous / 06/03/2015 at 6:15am / United States (Indiana) / Health

Today, I gave my girlfriend a hickey barely an inch from her vagina. She texted me later, saying her dad saw it and had grounded her. So yeah, I'm not sure I even want to know what the hell goes on in their house. FML

by W T F / 06/03/2015 at 3:22am / United States (Alabama) / Intimacy

Today, one of my tires blew out on the highway. I managed to slow down and pull over without dying, and went to get my spare tire. I found it right where it was supposed to be, knifed to hell and with a taunting note from my psycho ex taped to it. We broke up nearly 3 years ago. FML

by Milo / 06/02/2015 at 12:50pm / Mexico (Distrito Federal) / Miscellaneous

Today, I'm so deprived of intimacy that I got a raging boner when a waitress called me "hun". FML

by bonehead69 / 05/31/2015 at 3:06am / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, while driving home from work, I saw my boyfriend mugging a woman on the sidewalk. FML

by Anonymous / 05/30/2015 at 3:28am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to explain to my little sister that not all guitars are supposed to have a hole in them, that when I was talking about "breaking it in" I didn't mean I'd smash a hole in it, and that she shouldn't have taken a hammer to my expensive new guitar. FML

by Anonymous / 05/29/2015 at 3:18pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous