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groovy579

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groovy579

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  • Number of visits : 7756
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 32 posted

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Visits<b>NicholausB</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 11:28pm<b>WolfyGrace</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 5:36am<b>midnight_tiger</b> - the 10/04/2014 at 5:59pm<b>Kruitdamp</b> - the 10/01/2014 at 5:39pm<b>kelseythompson</b> - the 10/01/2014 at 5:45am<b>Just_A_Tree</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 11:39pm<b>worldclassrager</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 3:00am<b>serslybro</b> - the 09/23/2014 at 2:41am<b>poopnpoop</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 9:30pm<b>hallison_13</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 10:41pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 8:34am<b>detectivedipsiht</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 7:49pm<b>Ironmayhem</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 2:29am<b>angeljade1234</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 10:29pm<b>Blake9250</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 11:52pm<b>CallMeWindSock</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 5:42pm<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 06/16/2014 at 4:03am<b>moomen</b> - the 06/15/2014 at 11:08pm

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groovy579's favorite FMLs

Today, after my windshield wipers being stolen twice in a row, I decided to hide in my car to catch the thief. I fell asleep. When I woke up, the new wipers were gone. FML

#21246432
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37303) - you deserved it (8815)

On 08/27/2014 at 1:19pm - misc - by spark - United States (California)

Today, I got my wisdom teeth removed. All I can remember is crying to my mom because I thought spoons were taking over the world. FML

Today, a guy in my class was talking about himself. He started his story with, "When I was little, I was a ginger." I replied without thinking, "Is that why you got put up for adoption?" Him being adopted was the actual story he wanted to tell. FML

#21246134
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20040) - you deserved it (20)

On 08/26/2014 at 11:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Kansas)

Today, I wore a sexy nurse's outfit for a little roleplay with my boyfriend. After the main event, he said the sex was actually pretty bad and that he should file a medical malpractice lawsuit. Then he laughed at his own joke, got dressed, and went out for drinks. FML

#21245913
80 comments

Today, I asked my dad to give me a haircut. After 20 minutes of "fuck"s and "shit"s, he gave up and just shaved my head bald. I pull off the look so badly that two people I don't even know have already told me I look like a psychopath. FML

#21245833
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33630) - you deserved it (5438)

On 08/26/2014 at 3:12pm - misc - by alanh69 (man) - United States (Iowa)

Today, it's my fourth day of my trip to the USA. I've actually started keeping count of the number of times people get confused because I was born in South Africa and yet am not black. Current count: 9. FML

#21245756
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41099) - you deserved it (3508)

On 08/26/2014 at 12:22pm - misc - by WTF, guys? - United States (California)

Today, while my teacher was demonstrating how to use the ultrasound equipment, we all figured out that I'm pregnant. FML

#21245451
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50616) - you deserved it (9734)

On 08/25/2014 at 10:37pm - health - by whotouchedyou1 - United States (Texas)

Today, it's been almost a week since I returned from my vacation to Ireland. Before I rarely drank. Now I'm pretty sure I'm an alcoholic. You might think I'm joking, but I've woken up hungover every day since I landed there. I basically paid to kill my liver and become AA's next poster child. FML

#21245034
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27261) - you deserved it (15190)

On 08/25/2014 at 12:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was playing Mario Kart with my wife. I threw a blue shell and it hit her. She then refused to speak to me for three hours straight until right before bedtime when she called me a bastard and told me to sleep on the couch. FML

#21244858
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42871) - you deserved it (7391)

On 08/25/2014 at 1:44am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my sister felt guilty and told me about the changes she secretly made to my résumé months ago. She'd put "doing your mom" and "corporate espionage" as my hobbies, and "Justin Bieber's pussy waxer" as a previous job. No wonder I'm still unemployed. FML

#21244565
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39947) - you deserved it (7260)

On 08/24/2014 at 5:50pm - work - by fuck you, tasha (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I overheard my dad say "Last time I didn't use a condom, I ended up with Steven, so for god's sake use 'em." I'm Steven. FML

#21244545
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38434) - you deserved it (3038)

On 08/24/2014 at 5:19pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, I landed my first job as a security officer. Only after I signed all the paperwork did I find out that the area I'll be working is apparently a hotspot for violent shootings. I'm screwed. FML

#21244497
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36585) - you deserved it (5334)

On 08/24/2014 at 4:03pm - work - by fucked - United States (California)

Today, the police knocked on my door, saying that they needed to investigate my house for animal abuse. Apparently the neighbours called, reporting a "screeching bird in pain". I have no bird, but I have been singing quite loudly recently. FML

#21244302
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37799) - you deserved it (5022)

On 08/24/2014 at 8:40am - animals - by abusedparrot - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my girlfriend sent me a bunch of sexy pics and said to come over to her place. I thought she was in the mood for sex. Nope, she just wanted me to come over and hang a shelf, after which she sent me back home. FML

#21244207
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39286) - you deserved it (5859)

On 08/24/2014 at 1:51am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, a guy took me out on a date. His imaginary friends joined us. FML

#21244154
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38435) - you deserved it (3057)

On 08/24/2014 at 12:14am - misc - by Anonymous - United States



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