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grimmelok

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grimmelok
  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5400
  • Number of comments : 111
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

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grimmelok's favorite FMLs

Today, I returned home to find that my boyfriend's dog had gotten into the garbage and ripped all my used pads to shreds. There's a trail of Always tatters leading to his dog bed, and blood everywhere. My blood. Oh God. FML

#8435501
249 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25355) - you deserved it (2234)

On 02/19/2010 at 3:24am - animals - by OMGraven (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was at a school rally I was talking to my friends when I noticed the entire gym had gotten quiet. Not knowing why I thought it would be funny to yell out "it's too quiet!" apparently it was a moment of silence for a teacher that had recently died. FML

#7889872
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5160) - you deserved it (45664)

On 02/04/2010 at 10:12pm - misc - by ... - Sent from mobile version

Today, I had to explain to my son that his dad was too busy in a raid on World of Warcraft to be at his award ceremony. FML

#7816615
585 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40563) - you deserved it (30566)

On 02/02/2010 at 3:30pm - kids - by fuckmylife (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I found out that whilst I was asleep last night, my boyfriend was playing on his XBox. I also found out that whenever he unlocked a new level, achievement or just generally beat someone's ass, he would celebrate by pulling out one of his pubes and putting it in my mouth. FML

#7773873
404 comments

I agree, your life sucks (88044) - you deserved it (9128)

On 02/01/2010 at 5:23am - misc - by doesnttastegood (woman) - United Kingdom (Bath and North East Somerset)

Today, I had my cigs tucked into my waistband because my shorts didn't have pockets. A friend walks up and asks for a smoke. I say "I've got something you can smoke right here", tugging at my shorts. The "friend" then kicks me in the nuts for being a douche. FML

#7637016
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5984) - you deserved it (27087)

On 01/28/2010 at 5:24am - misc - by wishihadpockets (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I went to the doctor for horrible stomach pains. He said I had an abnormal amount of stool in me, and that I'd need to flush it out. I called my mom and told her what happened, to which she responded, "I always knew you were full of shit, I didn't need a doctor to tell me that." FML

#7631341
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26334) - you deserved it (5759)

On 01/28/2010 at 12:01am - misc - by Crap (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was talking this pretty religious girl that I like. We were playing a game and I asked her if she could go back in history and meet anyone who would it be. She said Jesus. Without thinking I said "I mean someone that was real." FML

#7556761
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13081) - you deserved it (30672)

On 01/24/2010 at 10:31pm - misc - by Ben (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I woke up to a text from my boyfriend that said "Dude, I think she knows I'm going to break up with her." FML

#7534728
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27123) - you deserved it (1942)

On 01/24/2010 at 12:21am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I went for a ride with my son. I noticed he didn't have his seat belt on. To teach him a lesson, I drove very slowly and hit the brakes really hard. The impact was greater than I thought, so my son hit his head against the window and left a huge crack. He just laughed. FML

#7318850
290 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5432) - you deserved it (43615)

On 01/13/2010 at 1:12pm - kids - by Joe (man) - Belgium (Oost-Vlaanderen)

Today, I had the sudden urge to sneeze as I was wiping my ass. Out of instinct, I used my hand to cover my mouth. I never let go of the toilet paper. FML

#7217520
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20966) - you deserved it (24230)

On 01/08/2010 at 1:48pm - misc - by Hugh_Jankles (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had one more gift to buy: a copy of Fight Club. I asked a person working at Best Buy if they had any in stock. The man wouldn't sell me the last copy because I had broken the first two rules. FML

#6923345
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20898) - you deserved it (9425)

On 12/24/2009 at 3:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I was on a plane. The person sitting next to me was using the plane's wifi, and was on Facebook. They joined the group 'I hate sitting next to fat people on airplanes'. FML

#6752282
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27818) - you deserved it (8210)

On 12/14/2009 at 1:49pm - misc - by fatman (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I found out why two of my friends race downstairs to each other to the cafeteria everyday at lunch; apparently there's only one free seat at the table with the rest of their friends, and the loser has to eat lunch with me. FML

#6725334
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25987) - you deserved it (1951)

On 12/12/2009 at 6:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I found out why two of my friends race downstairs to each other to the cafeteria everyday at lunch; apparently there's only one free seat at the table with the rest of their friends, and the loser has to eat lunch with me. FML

#6725334
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25987) - you deserved it (1951)

On 12/12/2009 at 6:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States



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