Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

greygloss

Offline (the 11/30/2014 at 4:49am) | Search for a member

greygloss

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3161
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

greygloss's page activity

Visits<b>mattymuffins</b> - the 01/12/2014 at 3:46am<b>ashleyylove3</b> - the 11/01/2013 at 7:22am<b>olpally</b> - the 10/20/2013 at 1:22pm<b>jillytc</b> - the 10/20/2013 at 9:44am

greygloss's FML badges

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of greygloss's badges

greygloss's favorite FMLs

Today, I found a $20 bill on the ground, so I decided to pick it up. It was actually attached to a string and was meant to be a prank by some kids. They failed miserably, so I took the money. They ran up to me and punched me in the balls for taking their cash. FML

#21290736
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32995) - you deserved it (6371)

On 11/02/2014 at 7:11pm - money - by ethawesome1125 - United States (Texas)

Today, I overheard my son mutter to himself, "If Hitler could do it to that many people, so could I..." Anyone recommend a good psychiatrist? FML

#21290608
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32387) - you deserved it (2885)

On 11/02/2014 at 3:57pm - kids - by failure (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I woke up to my 7 year old son angrily trying to smother me with a pillow. FML

#21290572
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34886) - you deserved it (3882)

On 11/02/2014 at 2:47pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was singing in my dorm. When I left a little later, a cute guy came up to me and asked if I was the girl who'd been singing. I proudly said yes. He replied, "Good thing you finally shut the fuck up!" and walked away. FML

#21290447
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30865) - you deserved it (9248)

On 11/02/2014 at 11:44am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I went down on my girlfriend for the first time. The words "Christ, Jeff. It's a vagina, not a burrito. CALM DOWN!" were spoken. FML

#21290417
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37584) - you deserved it (10598)

On 11/02/2014 at 10:36am - intimacy - by jay-frey96 (man) - United States (California)

Today, my daughter mentioned that she didn't need to work because she could convert a dollar to 13 Mexican pesos and convert it back into "13 USD", over and over again. She's 17. FML

#21290410
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34783) - you deserved it (4351)

On 11/02/2014 at 10:23am - kids - by wow - United States (Florida)

Today, I was shopping for a new deodorant, and this guy was standing in the way. He wouldn't move, so I crouched down to get the one I wanted, right when he did the most violent fart right in my face. Then his wife came over, made a face and he whispered, "I think that girl just farted". FML

#21290313
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35449) - you deserved it (3141)

On 11/02/2014 at 6:28am - health - by smellyhair - United Kingdom

Today, my daughter admitted to me that the only reason she's nice to me is because I give her money. She's six. FML

#21290277
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30423) - you deserved it (4407)

On 11/02/2014 at 4:09am - kids - by anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend was giving me a back massage while I was laying on my stomach. A few minutes into it, he stopped. I turned around to see why; he was taking a picture of my butt. FML

#21290182
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29285) - you deserved it (6449)

On 11/02/2014 at 12:51am - love - by anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I saw what my mom handed out for trick-or-treaters last night. Toothbrushes. Yup, we're that house. FML

#21289931
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33801) - you deserved it (2810)

On 11/01/2014 at 6:22pm - kids - by ThaBoss12 - United States (California)

Today, my boss is still refusing to fire my psychotic coworker, who's made it his mission to insult, annoy, bully and threaten me every day into making me quit. My boss is convinced the guy just has "assburger's" and that the company would get sued if we fired him. FML

#21289781
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30800) - you deserved it (2876)

On 11/01/2014 at 2:59pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I realized why the lady I had complimented the night before on Halloween about her amazing one-armed costume, looked so hurt. She is literally missing an arm. I'm an asshole. FML

#21289586
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33087) - you deserved it (12274)

On 11/01/2014 at 8:58am - misc - by That Guy - United States (Florida)

Today, I dressed up as my friend for Halloween. He has a very distinct style and I thought my costume was pretty clever. When he saw me, he said he had never been so offended in his entire life, and now I feel like a complete asshole. FML

#21289474
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28388) - you deserved it (13886)

On 11/01/2014 at 1:47am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, I went to a Halloween party dressed in Charlie Brown's ghost costume, a white sheet with holes all over. I got beat up for dressing like a member of the KKK. FML

#21289401
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33007) - you deserved it (6293)

On 10/31/2014 at 11:59pm - misc - by Halloween Fail (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my parents told me they don't think I'll ever find a boyfriend, and insist on referring to my future cats as their "grandkids". FML

#21289318
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29132) - you deserved it (2612)

On 10/31/2014 at 9:16pm - love - by really - United States



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: