Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

greeneyebeauty9

Search for a member

greeneyebeauty9

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 7 April 1998 (16 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 5552
  • Number of comments : 358
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About greeneyebeauty9 : i'm gabriella. i'm 16 years young. i'm half Hispanic, half Serbian. aries. ♡☆ also, i'm very outgoing. i'm about 4'10, eh maybe a lil shorter at about 100 pounds. i'm a pretty laid back girl.. i love food, cuz well.. you know.. food. this web site entertains me. i have a boyfriend who makes me very happy, so screw off. I may be too young for love, but I can sure as hell like someone if i want. keep your opinions to yourself. if you're going to write me with a flirtatious message, then it's no use because I won't reply. thought I'd let you know now. I'm in an interracial relationship so don't make any racist remarks toward me for the simple fact that I don't tolerate it. I occasionally like to correct grammar. my own grammer isn't the best but I try. this is pretty much all you need to know about me. go on with your day and proceed to have a nice life. OH! I'm also here if you ever just need someone to talk to. I'm all ears.☆ 10/11/12 ♥

greeneyebeauty9's page activity

Visits<b>DrummerWS</b> - 26 minutes ago<b>StupidlyCute</b> - 32 minutes ago<b>mschmuty</b> - 41 minutes ago<b>Saiph</b> - one hour ago<b>Bulldozer36</b> - one hour ago<b>Trollx</b> - one hour ago<b>grapegamer</b> - one hour ago<b>saocrates</b> - 2 hours ago<b>Llamassss</b> - 2 hours ago<b>luffy5677</b> - 2 hours ago<b>Tundulinski</b> - 2 hours ago<b>mansfield_j</b> - 2 hours ago<b>QuaSiCos</b> - 2 hours ago<b>Rawrshi</b> - 2 hours ago<b>dc2fresh</b> - 3 hours ago<b>Leo619</b> - 3 hours ago<b>macncheeze97</b> - 3 hours ago<b>tiptoe55</b> - 4 hours ago

greeneyebeauty9's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of greeneyebeauty9's badges

greeneyebeauty9's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend and I were quite drunk while we were fooling around on the couch, when I decided I wanted to lose my virginity to her. I was two thrusts in when she burst out laughing. Looking down, I realized I was between her cheeks and the couch cushion. I lost my virginity to her couch. FML

#21053213
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51953) - you deserved it (18457)

On 02/07/2014 at 9:18am - intimacy - by Unknown - United States (Iowa)

Today, I was driving along when I noticed a kid struggling to push his car up the crest of a hill. I jumped out to help him, and he acted surprised to see me. Once we got the car over the hill, it rolled on down. I then saw that no one was actually in the driver's seat. I'd helped a vandal. FML

Today, I invited my best friend to sleep on my couch while he looks for a new place. He walked inside, dropped his stuff on the floor and asked me my policy on hookers. I laughed it off as a joke. Half an hour later my doorbell rang. He took my laughter as a yes. FML

#21047796
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40587) - you deserved it (6275)

On 02/02/2014 at 1:33am - misc - by tsukinoie - United States

Today, I was in the process of finally losing my virginity. Part-way through, my neighbour started shouting from his backyard, "Go, Nicolas! You can do it!" He was talking to his son, but the two of us have the same name. I couldn't finish. FML

#21046533
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54101) - you deserved it (6003) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/31/2014 at 4:05pm - intimacy - by prochainefois (man) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I went down on the girl of my dreams. While I was down there, I started to put on a condom. As I came back up to start having sex, she told me she couldn't cheat on her boyfriend. FML

#21046118
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58375) - you deserved it (11377)

On 01/31/2014 at 10:29am - intimacy - by wtfjusthappened - United States (Washington)

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend, and I really started getting into it. I said, "Hang on tight, this is gonna get intense." She replied, "Doubt it" and yawned. FML

#21044260
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51670) - you deserved it (16483)

On 01/29/2014 at 4:04pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Wrexham)

Today, I woke up after a night out partying only to find I'd wet the bed. I was so ashamed that I rolled my girlfriend into it to avoid taking the blame. FML

#21042040
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21153) - you deserved it (55961)

On 01/27/2014 at 5:31pm - misc - by :( (man) - Algeria

Today, I was applying for jobs online when my father called. When I told him what I was doing, he said in all seriousness that I should just be a sugar baby. I said he must be joking, but he replied, "Honey, if I had your tits, I'd never work a day in my life." 5ML

#21037822
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41530) - you deserved it (4544)

On 01/24/2014 at 12:15am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend of 6 years told me that since I've proven my loyalty and faithfully stuck by his side, he has no reason to ever consider marrying me, because "It's not like you're going anywhere, honey." He seems not to understand why I am upset by this. FML

#21037274
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47981) - you deserved it (5043)

On 01/23/2014 at 3:57pm - love - by heartbrokenhaley - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I visited my girlfriend at her place, one thing lead to another, and we had sex for the first time. Her normally very sweet cat now hisses and savages me if I so much as look at him. FML

#21034982
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42468) - you deserved it (7022)

On 01/21/2014 at 12:43pm - intimacy - by idiot says pussy (man) - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex. After a while, he started staring at my lady parts, and said my "vag looks like a mockingjay". He then stretched the lips apart like wings and made little "CA-CAW CA-CAW!" sounds. FML

#21033383
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55708) - you deserved it (8964)

On 01/19/2014 at 10:59pm - intimacy - by Goodyear (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I asked my girlfriend's dad for permission to take her hand in marriage. He said no, because he doesn't want her marrying a "sexist idiot who treats her like property", which he thinks asking permission amounts to, then told me to grow up. FML

#21033078
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48842) - you deserved it (9975)

On 01/19/2014 at 5:59pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, while I was fooling around with my girlfriend, she hurt her hand. It obviously wasn't very serious, so I told her to stop faking it. She responded, "Wanna know what I actually fake? My orgasms." FML

#21031998
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34662) - you deserved it (56467)

On 01/18/2014 at 5:55pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I shut one of my breasts in my car door. FML

#21031414
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49298) - you deserved it (9278)

On 01/18/2014 at 1:29am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I found out that I'm pregnant. My boyfriend thinks I'm faking the whole thing in revenge for the fight we had yesterday. FML



FML's blog

  • Freaks's Illustrated FML
  • What's going on? Something weird is going on. I can feel in my bones. Can't you? People are acting weird, as if they're short-fused all of a sudden. There's definitely something…

Friday 1 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: