gothnotemo

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gothnotemo

0Fucked!

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  • Number of visits : 5160
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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gothnotemo's page activity

Visits<b>xkore787</b> - the 06/07/2014 at 8:29pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 02/20/2014 at 4:42pm<b>jpi13</b> - the 06/03/2009 at 9:59pm

gothnotemo's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

gothnotemo's favorite FMLs

Today, I noticed a car following me all the way to my house. It was dark so I got really nervous and called the police. The person got out of the car. It was my mom. FML

by dani911 / 07/14/2009 at 9:16pm / United States (Georgia) / Transportation

Today, while at my boyfriend's house waiting for him to shower, his mother slams a pair of underwear on the table and tells me that if she ever finds something like that in her son's room again, she is forbidding him from seeing me. The underwear isn't mine. FML

by Anonymous / 07/14/2009 at 8:37pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was eating a croissant. After eating half of it and about to take another bite, a spider crawled out of one of the holes of flaky deliciousness and descended down a thread of web to the table, where it scuddled away. There was a whole family of them living in there. FML

by homedoggieo / 07/14/2009 at 7:57pm / United States (North Carolina) / Animals

Today, my drunk boyfriend told me he thought of new positions for us to try in bed because it was getting boring. We haven't had sex yet. FML

by bellaboop1990 / 07/14/2009 at 6:13pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend's mom pulled me aside and started telling me about how her daughter was extremely depressed and suicidal before she met me, and how happy her family is because of me. I was planning on breaking up with her within the next week. FML

by hungryman / 07/14/2009 at 5:10pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend of over a year said she has been faking her orgasms since the first time we've had sex. FML

by guess28 / 07/14/2009 at 2:19pm / Puerto Rico / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend of over a year said she has been faking her orgasms since the first time we've had sex. FML

by guess28 / 07/14/2009 at 2:19pm / Puerto Rico / Intimacy

Today, I went to a restaurant for lunch. The waiter brought some bread and I started eating it as I waited for him to take my order. When he approached me he looked at me and said, "Don't eat too much bread honey. It'll make you fatter." Not fat, fatter. I never thought of myself as fat. FML

by Anonymous / 07/14/2009 at 2:03pm / Spain (Madrid) / Health

Today, I applied for my first job. I didn't know how to write a resume, so I copied and pasted one from someone else and reworked it. I got on the bus, handed it in, and left. Then I remembered I forgot to change the contact info and date. FML

by captainfail / 07/14/2009 at 11:27am / Germany (Bremen) / Work

Today, I was cuddling with my boyfriend watching a movie, my boyfriend then leans in and says: "You know, you're my favourite girlfriend." I then jokingly responded by saying: "You say that like I'm not the only girlfriend you have right now." I hate being right. FML

by dinapar / 07/14/2009 at 10:02am / Canada (Manitoba) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to a neon themed party. Standing by the UV light, I looked down and realised my pad was glowing through my tights. FML

by paddy / 07/14/2009 at 8:23am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, I received an email with a link to a story about a man who lost 650 pounds. I ignored it, until I saw who sent it. My mom, with the message "Maybe there's hope for you." FML

by Anonymous / 07/14/2009 at 7:41am / United States (Connecticut) / Health

Today, it was my birthday, and my boyfriend got surgery on his gallbladder because he had big gallstones. After they were removed, he was still a little out of it from the morphine. He gave the gallstones to me for my birthday. Better still, his mom suggested I make a necklace out of them. FML

by gallstones / 07/09/2009 at 3:02am / United States (Georgia) / Love

Today, I realized how fat I really am. While going to the bathroom I leaned to the side to wipe my butt and heard a crack. Not knowing what it was, I continued to wipe. After I finished, I got up to see that I'd cracked the toilet seat in half. FML

by Fattypatty / 07/09/2009 at 2:21am / United States (California) / Health

Today, I asked a buddy of mine if he wanted to see a movie. He said he was busy that day, so I decided to go alone. Midway through, the couple behind me is making out and kicking my seat. I turn around, and it's my ex-girlfriend making out with my buddy. FML

by frankfukhergood / 07/09/2009 at 1:49am / Canada / Miscellaneous