gotaplanstan

Search for a member

Online

gotaplanstan

3Fucked!

gotaplanstangotaplanstan
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 21 March 1983 (33 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2423
  • Number of comments : 152
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About gotaplanstan : I bleed Green & Gold
and love me some cats & dogs

gotaplanstan's page activity

Visits<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 04/20/2016 at 11:17pm<b>princessofbelair</b> - the 03/18/2016 at 9:28pm<b>thevoidwalkers</b> - the 02/29/2016 at 5:55pm<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 02/29/2016 at 5:22pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 10:44pm<b>chinaski7628</b> - the 02/05/2016 at 7:00pm<b>Ashd09</b> - the 02/05/2016 at 6:49pm<b>faerieonacid</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 3:46pm<b>eski2015</b> - the 01/17/2016 at 10:29pm<b>Ipeh</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 3:04am<b>eyepuppy</b> - the 12/30/2015 at 6:42pm<b>interesting33</b> - the 12/17/2015 at 5:56pm<b>By_The_9</b> - the 11/24/2015 at 4:44pm<b>fringeisawesome</b> - the 10/09/2015 at 3:33pm<b>americanafrican</b> - the 09/19/2015 at 4:38pm<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 09/18/2015 at 11:36am<b>Anastazia_</b> - the 09/16/2015 at 2:26pm<b>zjay</b> - the 09/15/2015 at 9:01pm

Fucked!<b>interesting33</b> - the 12/18/2015 at 12:00am<b>americanafrican</b> - the 09/19/2015 at 10:38pm<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 09/18/2015 at 5:36pm

gotaplanstan's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of gotaplanstan's badges

gotaplanstan's favorite FMLs

Today, it's been weeks since some asshat started placing gnomes in my front and back yards. I resorted to setting up cameras, which I thought had deterred the idiot, until I walked into my kitchen this morning and found two gnomes on the counter. Nothing on the tapes. I'm freaking out here. FML

by ilivealoneandwhatthefuck / 06/23/2013 at 1:02pm / Guam / Miscellaneous

Today, after discovering that our son is already sexually active, I asked my husband to have a talk with him. "Remember, son, it's all about the clit", wasn't what I had in mind. FML

by Anonymous / 06/08/2013 at 6:34am / United States (Alabama) / Intimacy

Today, I got to drive my mom's car. I'd recently watched the new Fast and Furious movie, I thought it'd be fun to drift around a few corners. I ended up smashing straight into someone's front yard. FML

by Anonymous / 06/07/2013 at 6:00pm / United States / Transportation

Today, while my boyfriend was in the kitchen, he got three text messages, all of which were from "Babe 2", "Babe 3", and "Babe 4". FML

by How strange / 04/20/2013 at 8:02am / United States / Love

Today, I woke up to my brother chopping all my bangs off. When I yelled at him, he could only shout back, "You can see clearly now, the bangs are gone!" FML

by my dumb bro / 04/17/2013 at 12:13pm / United States (Arkansas) / Kids

Today, while mopping floors at the police station, an inmate pissed on the floor, demanded that I suck his dick, begged me for a glass of water and finally informed me that he would kill my family. I said nothing and he started weeping softly. I laughed, but slipped in his piss and broke my arm. FML

by JimmyT / 03/03/2013 at 5:21pm / Norway (Hordaland) / Work

Today, I was taking my dog for a walk and forgot a bag to pick up his poop, since it's illegal to not pick it up in my town. Right as my dog started to take a dump, a cop car drove by and continued to watch me as I was forced to pick up the poop with my bare hands. FML

by yikes / 03/02/2013 at 10:32am / United States / Animals

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend, and after a while, she moved her hand down to my crotch. She felt my erection, then got up and yelled at me, calling me a horny pig for "assuming we were going to have sex." FML

by sn-511 / 03/01/2013 at 5:54pm / Italy (Campania) / Intimacy

Today, my neighbor went on vacation, leaving me in charge of his cat and dog. For some reason, he calls his dog "Cat" and his cat "Dog". There are two pet food containers, one labeled "Cat" and the other labeled "Dog". I have no idea which one goes to which animal. FML

by catdog / 01/02/2013 at 1:07am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I was walking home when I saw an elderly woman struggling with a large bag of garbage. I asked if I could help. I got it all the way to the dumpster and the bag ripped. Inside were about fourteen dead cats. FML

by AdamwithanA / 10/10/2012 at 11:36pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my husband let me know he felt I was ignoring him by jabbing me in the right ear with his erect penis while I was Skyping with my mum overseas. FML

by Anonymous / 10/10/2012 at 5:48pm / Canada (Manitoba) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend opened my refrigerator and began her standard moan: "You're a pig, you never clean up. Look at that egg, it makes me want to throw up, it's gone black, it’s covered in fuzz, IT'S GOT HAIR ON IT!" I got up to check it out. It was a Kiwi fruit. FML

by opinaise / 08/02/2012 at 9:00am / France (Midi-Pyrenees) / Love

Today, while showering with my boyfriend, he asked if something was weird about his penis. Naturally, I looked closer. As soon as I did, he sprayed my face with urine. This is only the beginning; we just moved in. FML

by quirrus / 05/07/2012 at 5:42am / United States / Intimacy

Today, to avoid looking like a loser in front of his friends who all have girlfriends, my brother made up a perfect relationship. He asked me to give him a hickey in exchange for 50 euros. Our parents walked in on us. FML

by Flip / 05/02/2012 at 1:06am / France (Rhone-Alpes) / Love

Today, I couldn't contain my laughter when a patient told me she'd named her unborn daughter Twinkie. FML

by Anonymous / 01/06/2012 at 5:49pm / United States / Work