goldman

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Offline (the 04/15/2015 at 6:02am)

goldman

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 114
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About goldman : You don't need to know about me

goldman's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

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You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

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goldman's favorite FMLs

Today, I got rejected by a girl I wasn't even trying to ask out. FML

by this guy / 11/21/2013 at 12:27am / United States (California) / Love

Today, my boyfriend left me for my neighbor. Her name is Hope. She'd better "hope" I don't take a dump in her yard. FML

by queenlatifa101bebe / 12/09/2011 at 9:48pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend refered to her vagina as a meat wallet, and to my penis as small change. FML

by trembelwick / 12/03/2011 at 5:04am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I woke up to my Playstation 3 and my laptop missing and window open. My dad faked a robbery to see me freak out. FML

by dwhite032 / 06/06/2011 at 3:06am / United States (Indiana) / Geek

Today, I accidentally pocket dialed my sister while I was masturbating. FML

by fmyhabit / 04/15/2011 at 1:34am / United States (Utah) / Intimacy

Today, my husband decided to imitate Borat and shout "Very Nice! I Excite!" while having sex. He's also decided that it was ingenious and does it every single time, the entire time. FML

by mrssagdiyev / 03/05/2011 at 9:19am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy

Today, I asked my boyfriend in a sexy way "What should we do now, honey?" He answered, "Suck my dick?" I said "I was thinking of something more... romantic." He replied "Suck my dick in the moonlight?" FML

by Anonymous / 10/13/2010 at 9:20am / Spain (Asturias) / Intimacy

Today, I literally stopped traffic. I was crossing the street and a butterfly landed on me. Being phobic of butterflies, I had a panic attack in the middle of the road. Oh, and I am 17, captain of our football team, and in very good shape. My girlfriend laughed the hardest. FML

by Butterflyguy / 08/14/2009 at 1:10pm / Canada (Saskatchewan) / Animals