gofferurself

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gofferurself

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 786
  • Number of comments : 55
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About gofferurself : RIbbit woof woof meow woof

gofferurself's page activity

Visits<b>riot_grrrl</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 1:32pm<b>accursed_phoenix</b> - the 07/30/2013 at 11:38am<b>asocial_much</b> - the 09/09/2011 at 10:59am<b>xRenegadeRoguex</b> - the 09/01/2011 at 1:00am<b>geeksaresexy</b> - the 08/17/2011 at 7:03am

gofferurself's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of gofferurself's badges

gofferurself's favorite FMLs

Today, I got a call from a creditor asking for a Sarah. I told them that I'm not Sarah, nor do I know one. They then asked if she was my wife. Annoyed, I said, "Alright, when did I get a wife? I don't even remember having a girlfriend." They sniggered and hung up. FML

by Miriden / 07/19/2011 at 10:41am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was laying in bed making out with a girl. After trying to figure out for a while why she was spending so much time on my neck it finally hit me. She was frantically and secretly trying to remove the gum she got stuck in my hair. She failed. FML

by tLee / 07/19/2011 at 12:04am / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I were having a romantic moment when I made a Star Wars reference. I don't know what's worse, the fact that I said it or the fact that he seemed more turned on by it. FML

by RobinBunny713 / 07/18/2011 at 11:23pm / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy

Today, at my anniversary party and in front of all our friends, I accidentally called my husband-to-be by my ex-boyfriend's name. FML

by Daria_Weiner / 07/18/2011 at 2:23pm / Russian Federation (Moscow City) / Love

Today, I caught a cab to take me to a hospital appointment. The driver turned around and told me I was in the Cash Cab. I got really excited and screamed. That is, until she laughed and said, "Just kidding. I always wanted to do that to someone." FML

by Anonymous / 07/15/2011 at 10:06pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I discovered my new plug-in air freshener smells exactly like my ex-boyfriend's cologne. My friends noticed this, and nobody will believe me when I say it smelled different on the scratch-and-sniff. Now I'm considered a creep. A nostalgic, obsessed creep. FML

by Creep / 07/15/2011 at 7:10pm / United States (Puerto Rico) / Love

Today, I had a woman accuse me of trying to steal her husband over the phone, just because I called and asked for him. I'm an interviewer. FML

by TabbiNicole / 07/15/2011 at 7:38am / United States / Work

Today, as a joke, I hid under my parents' bed, hoping to scare them when they came home. When they finally arrived, they burst through their bedroom door, tearing each other's clothes off. I had to keep my breath in time with my mom's panting and moaning as my dad brutally dominated her. FML

by gir / 07/14/2011 at 3:35pm / United States (Tennessee) / Intimacy

Today, I was robbed by a guy wearing a ninja turtle costume. FML

by Lame / 07/09/2011 at 8:19pm / United States (New York) / Money

Today, I peeked through my window and trained a pair of binoculars on my neighbour's house. Every night without fail, he ends up standing in front of his window topless to flex his muscles. This time, I was surprised to instead find a note taped to the window saying, "Sorry, I'm out tonight." FML

by Anonyme / 07/08/2011 at 8:11pm / Love

Today, my girlfriend who was planning on waiting until marriage for sex decided to have sex with me. It's been 4 hours and she hasn't stopped crying, praying and calling me the devil's temptation. FML

by devilboy / 07/06/2011 at 7:26am / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend who was planning on waiting until marriage for sex decided to have sex with me. It's been 4 hours and she hasn't stopped crying, praying and calling me the devil's temptation. FML

by devilboy / 07/06/2011 at 7:26am / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy

Today, my dad gave me a speech about being gay. He said he'll accept me if that's who I truly am, but he wants me to think it over first. I'm an actor in a play. I had to explain the concept of wearing costumes and acting like someone else to him. For the third time. FML

by sealpop09 / 06/30/2011 at 10:36am / United States (Colorado) / Work

Today, I sent my romantic interest a sexy text about a dream I had about a "sex gameshow." I sent it by replying to the last text sent. I'm now responsible for traumatizing my 12 year old niece who could only reply, "Like Jeopardy?" FML

by PandaMantis / 06/25/2011 at 12:32am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, during my honeymoon, my wife and I finally went scuba-diving. My nose was too big to fit in the face goggles, so I couldn't go. My wife went without me anyway. FML

by pinocchio / 06/24/2011 at 7:04pm / United States / Love