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About gml12344 : The names Meryl. It suits me well.
I love music. It seriously is my whole life.
I'm a singer and play guitar.
Hte it wen ppl tlk lyke dis.
And there's probably a ton more but that's it.
Go there now!
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Today, I usd mah hair straightener to attempt to straighten mah eyelashes and burnd mah eyelid. I don't knowhat's sadder, that fact I thought it would be fun, or that I was stupid enough to think I wouldn't hurt myself. FML
I'M GETTING OVER STREP THROAT . THE ANTIBIOTICS THEY GAVE ME MAKE ME HAVE DIARRHEA UNLESS I EAT YOGURT IN BETWEEN EACH PILL . THAT WOULDN'T BE SO BAD IF I WASN'T LACTOSE-INTOLERANT . YOGURT GIVES ME REALLY BAD GAS . SO I HAVE TO CHOOSE BETWEEN PAINFUL GAS OR DIARRHEA . FML
Today, I finally decidd to tell mother, a former Miss North Carolina winner, that I was several weeks pregnant. She immediately burst into tears and huggd me. She kept saying, ( Thank god, thank god. ) At first I was relievd. Then she said, ( I thought you were just getting fat. ) FML
Today, I found out if you slide down the stars on a foam matress topper, it just folds under instead of sliding. Then you slide the rest of the way down on yur knees and break yur nose at the bottom. looool FML
I woke up screaming. Why? Well, I was complaining to my dad yesterday about how I always hit the snooze button and just roll over when my alarm goes off, and how that results in me being late 4 morning classes. My dad thought he'd help out by placing a mousetrap on the snooze button. real FML
Today, my friend awoke me because looool I was talking in my sleep. When I askd herhat I was talking about she replid with, "Let's just say you were having tea with the Queen of England. And a duck. You're really good at quacking." FML
Today, I was making out with mah boyfriend . I opened mah eyes to see his eyes fixed on something else . I turned mah head to see what was so interesting . He was on his iPhone looking up recipe 4 thing to wrap in bacon . FML
Today, I Was On A Frst Date Wit A Grl At Te Movies. Trying To Be Polite, I Eld In A Fart Until An Intense, Loud Action Scene Came On. As Soon As I Let Go, Te Scene Went Silent And My Fart Was Clerely Eard To Everyone In Te Movie Teatre. My Date Went To Te Batroom. Se Didn't Come Back. FML
Friday 27 March 2015