About gmc_blossom : Hey, I'm Grace.
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gmc_blossom's favorite FMLs
Today, I found out that my son had sold his house key to one of his friends for half a packet of gum. Now there is someone out there who I have never met with full access to my house. My son is 16. FML
by Jilly / 08/08/2011 at 2:45am / Australia / Kids
by Wife / 08/07/2011 at 8:02pm / United States / Intimacy
Today, while watching tv at my mother's house, a tornado warning came across the screen. After being in the dark nasty basement for half an hour, my mom realizes she was watching a recorded show, and that tornado warning was for 2 weeks ago. FML
by cargaljen / 08/07/2011 at 1:29am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous
Today, my daughter wouldn't stop yapping on about not being able to register on the new Harry Potter website. The amount of whiny jibber-jabber emanating from her cake-hole made me want to boot her from our family tree, and I had to resort to booze to wash the pain away. I'm a terrible parent. FML
by makeitstop / 08/04/2011 at 9:41am / United Kingdom / Kids
by laughingflame / 08/04/2011 at 2:00am / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 08/03/2011 at 11:27pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy
Today, at some point, and for some reason I'll probably never fully understand, it seemed like a good idea to get completely shitfaced on tequila and try to shave my ballsack with a straight razor. I'm not sure if these wounds will ever heal. FML
by Anonymous / 08/01/2011 at 5:47pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 08/01/2011 at 4:32am / Australia (Victoria) / Health
by Anonymous / 08/01/2011 at 12:28am / United States (Kentucky) / Kids
by preggo / 07/31/2011 at 9:16pm / United States (Nebraska) / Health
by j / 07/25/2011 at 10:03pm / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation
by jab43 / 07/22/2011 at 8:57pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy
Today, I was in a pool locker room, surrounded by semi-naked people. While changing into my clothes, I accidentally pushed a button on my phone, causing it to make the loud, unmistakable camera shutter sound effect. Everyone definitely heard it. FML
by Roode / 07/22/2011 at 1:36pm / United States (West Virginia) / Miscellaneous
by oliverP123 / 07/22/2011 at 12:11am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by cheddar / 07/20/2011 at 6:17pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, I took a test. I got up to turn it in, and accidentally bumped into another student. We both… 2Today, my energetic 10-month-old decided to stay up four hours past bedtime. After I FINALLY got… 3Today, I tried to fire the worst worker I've ever had over the phone because he never shows up for…