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gmc_blossom

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gmc_blossom
  • Town/Country : Michigan, United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2081
  • Number of comments : 365
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About gmc_blossom : Jesse: It's all about accepting who you really are. I accept who I am.

Walt: And who are you?

Jesse: I'm the bad guy.

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gmc_blossom's favorite FMLs

Today, I shat out a staple. FML

#16576766
332 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35143) - you deserved it (15378)

On 06/09/2011 at 11:04am - health - by wtf - United Kingdom (Edinburgh)

Today, against my wishes, my family and I went swimming with sharks. While in the shark cage, a shark got within a few feet of us. My cowardly bowels objected and caused me to shit myself. FML

#16403007
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32478) - you deserved it (9486)

On 05/29/2011 at 2:22pm - animals - by Brie - United States

Today, I walked in on my mom trying to wax her butt. FML

#16351736
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41571) - you deserved it (5741)

On 05/26/2011 at 12:15am - intimacy - by blahblah493 - United States

Today, I walked in on my mom trying to wax her butt. FML

#16351736
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41571) - you deserved it (5741)

On 05/26/2011 at 12:15am - intimacy - by blahblah493 - United States

Today, I came home to find that all my porn magazines have been "censored" with a black sharpie. FML

#15874125
296 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21571) - you deserved it (48279)

On 04/21/2011 at 2:30pm - intimacy - by Username - United States

Today, I found that the love of my life is 3.5 inches, fully erect. My cell phone is bigger than that. FML

#15749213
781 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61243) - you deserved it (12505)

On 04/12/2011 at 12:00am - intimacy - by Artic (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my mom caught me talking to my penis. FML

#15333405
377 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18623) - you deserved it (86461)

On 03/16/2011 at 3:31am - intimacy - by eric - United States

Today, I woke up next to my best friend after lots of drinking and the best sex I've ever had in my life. The only problem is we're both straight males. FML

#15042917
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47888) - you deserved it (40067)

On 02/19/2011 at 4:29pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was outside eating my lunch when an old man pulled his pants down and took a dump on the sidewalk next to me. FML

#13805619
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24827) - you deserved it (2337)

On 11/11/2010 at 7:54pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I discovered that nothing kills a wet dream faster than a kitten who pounces on things that wiggle under the blanket. FML

#5903153
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17863) - you deserved it (3144)

On 10/19/2009 at 8:43pm - intimacy - by JohnB (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was talking to my best friend. After admitting to me that he's gay, I gave him a hug for support and comfort, feeling his erection on my upper thigh. FML

#5579419
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20781) - you deserved it (4422)

On 10/01/2009 at 2:10am - intimacy - by betchyo (man) - United States (Massachusetts) - moderated by Kevin Nealon

Today, my little sister asked what masturbation was. We where having a family dinner with my grandparents. My mother then said, "Why don't you ask your brother? He is a pro." FML

#5528599
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23103) - you deserved it (5340)

On 09/28/2009 at 3:20pm - intimacy - by namhtor (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I told my girlfriend I have only one testicle. Her reaction? "Eeew, balls are gross!" I'm glad to know I'm only half as gross as other guys. FML

#5463165
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19264) - you deserved it (2732)

On 09/25/2009 at 7:13am - intimacy - by lone_ranger (man) - United States (Texas)



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