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gmc_blossom

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gmc_blossom
  • Town/Country : Michigan, United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2093
  • Number of comments : 365
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About gmc_blossom : Jesse: It's all about accepting who you really are. I accept who I am.

Walt: And who are you?

Jesse: I'm the bad guy.

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gmc_blossom's favorite FMLs

Today, my house got robbed. They left a note: "Next time, we steal your souls." FML

#17156963
339 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35729) - you deserved it (3159)

On 07/18/2011 at 12:26am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, I accidentally deep throated a fork. FML

#17150480
277 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14376) - you deserved it (24800)

On 07/17/2011 at 3:15pm - intimacy - by CaoiiBieber - Ireland

Today, I had to endure a long story about how and why my brother shaves his pubes. FML

#17148307
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28248) - you deserved it (4256)

On 07/17/2011 at 11:21am - intimacy - by Username - United States (California)

Today, I surprised my four year old daughter with a stuffed dinosaur. She named it 'Horny.' FML

#17145702
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31796) - you deserved it (7250)

On 07/17/2011 at 3:14am - kids - by douglas - United States (Washington)

Today, while working at Subway, a man ordered a sub with avocado. When I told him it was no longer available, he screamed, spit in my face and ran out, pushing over an innocent bystander in the process. FML

#17142025
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29790) - you deserved it (2848)

On 07/16/2011 at 10:46pm - work - by sandwichmaker - United States (Illinois)

Today, my husband told me that he never washes his hands after using the bathroom because he thinks it's only for "paranoid people". FML

#17140315
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25625) - you deserved it (3107)

On 07/16/2011 at 8:17pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Israel (Tel Aviv)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She was so happy that she began flapping her hands around and screaming. She was flapping her hands so hard she smacked herself in the face and started crying. FML

#17131113
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33698) - you deserved it (5338)

On 07/16/2011 at 1:38am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, I had to do a "damage report" on myself after going to the midnight premiere of Harry Potter. As I was waiting for the previews, a 20 year old man dressed as a house elf tackled and wrestled me for my seat. FML

#17121994
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24379) - you deserved it (4580)

On 07/15/2011 at 1:01pm - health - by beachbumb8538 - United States

Today, I came home to my mom dancing the hustle naked. With a group of 4 friends. FML

#17117147
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33856) - you deserved it (3127)

On 07/15/2011 at 2:25am - intimacy - by SCREWED (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my dog was scooped up by an owl. FML

#17115448
467 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52782) - you deserved it (9114)

On 07/15/2011 at 12:24am - animals - by flipnazn - United States (Texas)

Today, I walked in on my father and brother attempting to harmonize their farts. FML

#17109341
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29573) - you deserved it (5080)

On 07/14/2011 at 4:09pm - misc - by Username - United States

Today, as a joke, I hid under my parents' bed, hoping to scare them when they came home. When they finally arrived, they burst through their bedroom door, tearing each other's clothes off. I had to keep my breath in time with my mom's panting and moaning as my dad brutally dominated her. FML

#17109043
424 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29012) - you deserved it (86341)

On 07/14/2011 at 3:35pm - intimacy - by gir - United States (Tennessee)

Today, at work, a regular started talking to me. Subject of choice? His overwhelming amount of earwax. Apparently he'd like to make a candle out of it once he goes to the doctor to get it removed. FML

#17106852
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17362) - you deserved it (1378)

On 07/14/2011 at 11:25am - work - by Breanne - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, after not receiving my paycheck for over a month, I confronted my boss about it. His response? "You still work here?" FML

#17023007
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28664) - you deserved it (2527)

On 07/08/2011 at 1:10am - work - by outofajob - United States

Today, after running a couple of miles, I went upstairs into my air-conditioned room to cool off. Apparently, my mom walked past my room and heard me breathing heavily. Later, she had my dad give me a talk about masturbation. FML

#17022194
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31992) - you deserved it (2858)

On 07/08/2011 at 12:20am - intimacy - by chumleevil - United States (Maine)



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