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gizmo23

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gizmo23

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Monday 29 April 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 323
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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gizmo23's favorite FMLs

Today, after a week of intense fighting, my girlfriend of 4 years and I hung out. She told me she loved me, and I pointed out that last week she said she was going to dump me. Without missing a beat, she replied, "Only to scare you into submission." FML

#20454746
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29556) - you deserved it (7803)

On 01/12/2013 at 1:32am - love - by thanksbabe - United States

Today, I was on a plane and realized that the woman next to me was hiding a hedgehog in a plastic container. I'm severely afraid of hedgehogs but not wanting to give the woman up and get her in trouble, I tried to stay quiet. Which led to me to quietly hyperventilate and pass out on the plane. FML

#20445879
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22262) - you deserved it (6680)

On 01/07/2013 at 5:21am - health - by scaredofhedges (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because I'm too "high maintenance". And that's because I ask him to use condoms when we have sex, and I refuse to invite my friends over for threesomes. I don't know why I'm not actually glad we are broken up. FML

#20445835
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26897) - you deserved it (5290)

On 01/07/2013 at 3:35am - love - by kat124ever (woman) - United States (Armed Forces Europe, Middle East)

Today, I have been single and out of the game for so long that instead of having real wet dreams, I now dream about jacking off. FML

#20436185
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35641) - you deserved it (6153)

On 01/01/2013 at 12:26pm - intimacy - by lonely dreams - United States (Nevada)

Today, my girlfriend gave birth to our first child. Our nurse was the lady I had a one night stand with 3 nights ago, and yes she remembered me. FML

#19584401
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13213) - you deserved it (167702)

On 05/06/2012 at 9:44pm - intimacy - by T3STI (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my six year old son came up to me with his arms spread and said, "I feel like a hug." I got really excited and hopeful because he is very anti-social and hates physical contact. As soon as I stood up to hug him he said "Feeling's gone" and walked away. FML

#17134448
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39230) - you deserved it (4244)

On 07/16/2011 at 9:28am - kids - by Rejected (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was woken up by my step brother trying to put his tongue in my mouth. FML

#17015904
353 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62312) - you deserved it (4972)

On 07/07/2011 at 3:49pm - intimacy - by lizownsvirgy - United States (California)

Today, I was propositioned by an incredibly pretty girl. I'm a 24 year old virgin; she's my best mate's girlfriend. She tells him everything when drunk, and he's a black-belt in karate. This could officially be classified as torture. FML

#17012885
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33048) - you deserved it (5463)

On 07/07/2011 at 10:40am - love - by Junktown (man) - Israel (Tel Aviv)

Today, it's my birthday. I got a phone call from my high school bully, to remind me that he'll always be able to find me and do whatever he wants to me. He does this every year. I turn 34 today. FML

#17012107
315 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41808) - you deserved it (6356)

On 07/07/2011 at 8:19am - misc - by Snurkles (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my 15 year old girlfriend called to tell me she is pregnant. Her dad is ex-military, and makes a point of cleaning his guns every time I go to her house. FML

#17010843
708 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18242) - you deserved it (93401)

On 07/07/2011 at 3:43am - kids - by shit - United States

Today, it was my first day at my new job. My new boss asked me if I was single. After telling him I have been happily married for 6 years, he fired me on the spot. FML

#16793164
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48523) - you deserved it (3410)

On 06/22/2011 at 1:35am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, I found out that my boyfriend is extremely jealous of a stuffed toy that sits on my bed, all because it gets to 'sleep in the same bed as me and he doesn't.' Now, whenever he comes over, he throws it at the wall, death glares at it, then gets up and kicks it under my bed. FML

#16774144
361 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37030) - you deserved it (11850)

On 06/21/2011 at 12:46am - love - by holdengurl18 - China

Today, one of my husband's old college buddies came over for dinner. We reminisced about our college days, and he laughed as he told the story about my husband making up a friend, Marc Deveau, that he'd say he was visiting when he was cheating on his girlfriend. My husband still sees Marc Deveau. FML

#13798665
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58752) - you deserved it (3400) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 11/11/2010 at 3:40am - love - by Anonymous - France

Today, I need to find a way to explain to my 5, 7 and 12 year old kids their uncle wants to become their aunt. FML

#13773002
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49714) - you deserved it (9417)

On 11/09/2010 at 12:32am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, our class was focusing on discrimination, and our teacher asked us if anyone had ever felt discriminated against. I put my hand up to share a story, and my teacher immediately said "It's because you're ginger, isn't it?" That's not what I was going to say. FML

#13688243
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38967) - you deserved it (6985)

On 11/02/2010 at 1:43pm - misc - by gingerninja (woman) - United Kingdom (London)



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