About girlonfire96 : Probably forever alone. I embarrass myself more than I should.
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girlonfire96's favorite FMLs
by nofriends / 10/19/2013 at 5:57pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Huedadaa / 10/18/2013 at 8:05pm / France (Picardie) / Kids
Today, my otherwise lovely boyfriend of a month showed his true colors. He freaked out when he learned that I use tampons instead of pads. He yelled that using them is like cheating on him, because his penis is the only thing that should ever enter me. FML
by O-|---<=~ / 10/18/2013 at 7:01pm / United States (Washington) / Love
Today, my surgeon was talking to me about my upcoming heart bypass operation. I was extremely nervous from the start, but he somehow managed to keep saying things like "death", "fatalities", "high-risk", and "never wake up" throughout. FML
by DocBastard, meet DocCunt / 10/18/2013 at 6:12pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Health
Today, my mom let me stay home from school, because I was sick. We both agreed not to tell my dad, since he's adamant that I never miss even one day of school. A few hours after my mom left for work, he came back home, with another woman. FML
by Anonymous / 10/18/2013 at 12:26pm / Norway (Hordaland) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was pushed off of a glacier by a very angry tourist. Why? I work as a glacier guide, and apparently some people find it overly frustrating to be informed that there isn't a café on the glacier. FML
by Quasimodo / 10/18/2013 at 8:40am / Norway (Hordaland) / Work
by SassyBasher / 10/17/2013 at 8:14pm / United States (South Carolina) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/17/2013 at 9:43am / United States (Michigan) / Work
by Anonymous / 10/17/2013 at 1:51am / United States (Florida) / Kids
by TiredMum / 10/16/2013 at 9:33am / United States (Washington) / Kids
by erockinthesuburb / 10/15/2013 at 8:38pm / United States (Indiana) / Health
Today, my boyfriend dumped me for knowing more about Batman than he does. He's only seen some of the movies, and as a kid my dad owned a comic book store. He still doesn't see why I should know more, because I'm a girl, and "girls aren't supposed to know about super heroes." FML
by Anonymous / 10/15/2013 at 5:48pm / United States (Illinois) / Love
by secretsmakefriends / 10/15/2013 at 5:43pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
by collegegrad / 10/15/2013 at 11:51am / United States (New York) / Work
Today, I found out that my brother is adamant that if he records silence, then listens to said silence at full volume, it'll improve the headphones' noise-blocking abilities. I live with a complete idiot. FML
by Eggs6131 / 10/15/2013 at 9:09am / United Kingdom (Nottingham) / Miscellaneous