Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

giolazar

Online | Search for a member

giolazar

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 540
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

giolazar's page activity

Visits<b>brook823</b> - the 04/03/2014 at 2:46pm

giolazar's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

See all of giolazar's badges

giolazar's favorite FMLs

Today, I asked my 12-year-old son what he wanted for his birthday. He looked me dead in the eyes and said, "A whore." FML

#21265910
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33857) - you deserved it (5351)

On 09/26/2014 at 5:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I asked my dad to take me to the store so I could get some feminine hygiene products. When we got there, he went running down the aisles yelling, "Help! My daughter's bleeding to death! Where're the tampons?!" FML

#21261392
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38573) - you deserved it (3551)

On 09/19/2014 at 6:38pm - health - by tbree - United States (California)

Today, I found my husband in the bathtub, which was filled with blood-red water, motionless and staring blankly at the ceiling. I started screaming and crying, and he burst into laughter at his "hilarious" prank. He only seemed regretful that his video camera hadn't been recording properly. FML

#21261267
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36049) - you deserved it (3431)

On 09/19/2014 at 1:58pm - misc - by TuT (woman) - France

Today, my college did a fire drill, and instructions were given by intercom in English and Spanish. The guy beside me mused: "If they say it in English and Mexican, why not say it in Black too?" That guy is my idiot brother, and he was dead serious. Sometimes I think our parents are related. FML

#21257016
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35117) - you deserved it (2916)

On 09/12/2014 at 4:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I complimented a guy on his beard. His response? "Thanks. Wanna sit on it?" FML

Today, my boyfriend was entertaining himself by shoving tampons up his nose and seeing how far across the bed he could blow them. This man is the father of my son. FML

#21248639
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35074) - you deserved it (8695)

On 08/30/2014 at 7:11pm - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I got my wisdom teeth removed. All I can remember is crying to my mom because I thought spoons were taking over the world. FML

Today, my girlfriend took our prank war way too far and had a package sent to me at home. Confused, I opened it. It contained a dildo and a bottle of lube. I didn't know my dad was watching over my shoulder until I heard him choke on his coffee and felt it splash over my neck. FML

#21241836
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44984) - you deserved it (7572)

On 08/20/2014 at 5:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I called my boyfriend to let him know that I'm pregnant. He instantly replied "Bullshit!", then hung up and apparently skipped town. FML

#21241143
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43003) - you deserved it (5927)

On 08/19/2014 at 6:30pm - kids - by Xbieblette51 (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I told my husband that I'm jealous of all the other girls whose husbands always take pictures of them together and post them online. He responded by posting a picture of himself, with me on the toilet in the background, captioned "The bitch on the pot." FML

#21241016
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43445) - you deserved it (16506)

On 08/19/2014 at 2:16pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was hammered, and on my way home I walked into a policeman. My logic was: if I'm on the phone, he can't talk to me, so I pulled my phone out and started speaking. The officer then asked me why I was speaking to my wallet. FML

#21240900
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24269) - you deserved it (44647)

On 08/19/2014 at 9:37am - misc - by drunk under 18 teenager (man) - Morocco (Marrakech-Tensift-Al Haouz)

Today, to spice things up, my boyfriend suggested we wear disguises. Amused by the idea, I accepted. That's how I ended up having sex with Gandalf. FML

#21240323
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40835) - you deserved it (8362) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/18/2014 at 12:48am - intimacy - by Degueusement (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I asked my husband to tell me something nice about myself. He thought for a few moments, then said, "Uh, you shit quietly." FML

#21239720
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41021) - you deserved it (5671)

On 08/17/2014 at 12:40pm - love - by ugh thanks - United States (Ohio)

Today, while I was at the dentist, I couldn't stop gagging when he tried to put a tab in my mouth to get an x-ray. As I left, I overheard him saying, "I feel sorry for her boyfriend." FML

#21238932
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47965) - you deserved it (7698)

On 08/16/2014 at 12:03pm - intimacy - by gag reflex - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I dropped my kid into a crowded wishing fountain instead of a coin. FML

#21235686
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22057) - you deserved it (36093)

On 08/12/2014 at 6:21am - kids - by jake - Australia (New South Wales)



FML's blog

  • Gragrou's illustrated FML
  • One day, cats will rule the world, but not today, there's a bit of tin foil stuck under the couch. The Internet and cats is quite the love story, everybody knows that. A very serious study that was done…

Friday 26 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: