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gilthanas07

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gilthanas07

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  • Number of visits : 1650
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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gilthanas07's page activity

Visits<b>beth12</b> - the 05/03/2009 at 9:22pm<b>sydneysuicide</b> - the 03/02/2009 at 1:02am

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gilthanas07's favorite FMLs

Today, my parents were taking a tour of my apartment when my bird started making noises. It was mimicking my moans from when I was having sex yesterday. It was screaming in my voice, very noticeably. FML

#350139
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72685) - you deserved it (27217)

On 03/15/2009 at 6:45pm - intimacy - by Moanie (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I decided to watch some porn before bed. The lights were off and my roommate was already asleep behind me. I put on my noise-canceling headphones and turned up the volume all the way. After a few strokes my roommate got up and plugged in the headphones for me. FML

#55493
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9277) - you deserved it (61129)

On 02/16/2009 at 7:24pm - misc - by lunarboy (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, as I sat on the table in my gynecologist's office for my yearly checkup, I realized that was the most action I got in the past year. FML

#25767
15 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38435) - you deserved it (7469)

On 02/11/2009 at 3:04pm - misc - by dynomyte (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, at lunch I ordered a coke. The waiter replied "diet coke?" and I corrected him saying, "No, regular coke." He shook his head and said again, "diet coke." FML

#24019
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47366) - you deserved it (7923)

On 02/11/2009 at 2:14am - misc - by J (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, a flight attendant asked me if I was airsick because I looked really pale. I told her that was my normal complexion but thanked her for her concern. She insisted "No, that can't be normal." FML

#23429
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35763) - you deserved it (2387)

On 02/11/2009 at 12:16am - misc - by Casper (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was in the car with a group of my girl friends discussing sexual experiences when I looked down and realized my Blackberry had dialed the family I babysit for and had left a five minute voicemail. FML

#22263
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44145) - you deserved it (15333)

On 02/10/2009 at 8:46pm - intimacy - by Embarrassed (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, while in our communal showers in the highschool football locker room, I started to swing my penis around because it feels good and I was alone. Two minutes later the rest of the team hops into the shower with me. 30 dudes, one self-induced boner. FML

#21808
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10905) - you deserved it (68425)

On 02/10/2009 at 7:01pm - intimacy - by JLoistheBomb (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my husband found the box my morning after pill came in. He had a vasectomy 10 years ago. FML

#18272
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32691) - you deserved it (439791)

On 02/09/2009 at 7:46pm - intimacy - by apricot (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I woke up next to my girlfriend. When she asked me to pick up her thong from behind my bed I realized there were two. I didn't pick up hers. FML

#18252
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13224) - you deserved it (147173)

On 02/09/2009 at 7:41pm - misc - by Dulieu (man) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I drove my girlfriend home around 11 to her garage where we start to have sex. When she comes to climax she slips and hits her head. Her parents heard the crash and came down, we were both still naked and she was unconscious. FML

#18143
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (85705) - you deserved it (17865)

On 02/09/2009 at 7:07pm - intimacy - by douglisk1994 (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my boyfriend handcuffed me to the bed, naked. Someone pulled the fire alarm, and my boyfriend couldn't find the key. So he left me, and the Resident Advisor found me. The fireman had to cut the chain. FML

#12567
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (280187) - you deserved it (51826)

On 02/06/2009 at 10:55pm - misc - by hahahehehohohoo (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I gave my girlfriend some non-alcoholic beer as a joke. In slurred speech, she told me I have the body of a monk seal. She then took my keys, staggered to my car, and drove away. She crashed into a tree two blocks later. She's fine. FML

#12195
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20907) - you deserved it (26175)

On 02/06/2009 at 6:54pm - misc - by IntimidatorStag (man) - United States (California)

Today, my mom decided to tell me about her new boyfriend. I know him. I've slept with him. FML

#11697
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (76597) - you deserved it (16821)

On 02/06/2009 at 2:23pm - misc - by Noname - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I hooked up with this man for the first time. He takes his shirt off and has a chestful of black hair. He had his name shaved into it. FML

#8288
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35749) - you deserved it (7749)

On 02/04/2009 at 3:20pm - love - by banana (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)



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