Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

gharra5

Search for a member

gharra5
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 829
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

gharra5's last visitors

seth7_

gharra5's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

gharra5's favorite FMLs

Today, I got pulled over by a cop. Since my window wasn't working, I opened the door, causing him to run towards me with a drawn gun. He then had a go at me with his night stick. After realizing my window was broken, he laughed and let me off with a warning. FML

#14742129
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28566) - you deserved it (3552)

On 01/28/2011 at 10:43am - misc - by NotoriousSRJ (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was running late for school because I had a huge stomach ache. To save on time, I took a taxi. When the taxi driver hit a bump, I lost control of my bowels and shit myself. Not only do I have to wash my underwear in the sink at school now, but I had to pay the driver extra to remove the smell from his car. FML

#14731547
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21183) - you deserved it (3890)

On 01/27/2011 at 12:40pm - misc - by Username - Romania (Ilfov)

Today, I was grounded for not agreeing with an article on dating my mom found in a very strict magazine. The article told parents to monitor phone calls, make rumors about their children cheating on people and not allow their children anywhere but home. FML

#14694705
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36570) - you deserved it (2535)

On 01/24/2011 at 2:29am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Utah)

Today, I found out that it's extremely difficult to take a dump while holding a cup under your ass for a lab specimen. I also found out that you get so nervous that you can actually forget to lock the door. FML

#14635663
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23319) - you deserved it (4923)

On 01/19/2011 at 3:34am - health - by Anonymous (man) - Lebanon

Today, I was at the grocery store with my dad. He let out a very silent but foul abomination of a fart. The people behind us started gagging, so he turned, pointed at me and said "That was my daughter." FML

#14622916
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28922) - you deserved it (3134)

On 01/18/2011 at 3:28am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I had an asthma attack because I was masturbating too vigorously. FML

#14614726
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14479) - you deserved it (38240) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 3:13pm - intimacy - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, in dance class, the instructor asked me to demonstrate the splits to the group. I slid down, my legs opening wider as I descended. I then loudly farted for the full 5 seconds it took to reach the ground. FML

#14613104
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28151) - you deserved it (5108) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 11:44am - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - Switzerland - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, my parrot won't stop repeating my boyfriend's name. The problem is we broke up days ago and my parrot won't shut up. FML

#14560374
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24612) - you deserved it (4296)

On 01/12/2011 at 11:05pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I had to explain to my friend why it's inappropriate to conduct a phone conversation while simultaneously eating a bagel, listening to music, and taking a shit. FML

#14521055
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20793) - you deserved it (3350)

On 01/09/2011 at 1:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, feeling melancholy, I took a blanket out to the backyard and lay down to look at the clouds. My dad came out to ask me what I was doing. I told him, he smirked, squatted over my face, and farted. He then ran back inside and told my mom. She laughed. FML

#14490240
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26778) - you deserved it (5408)

On 01/06/2011 at 9:45pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was at my friend's house. We were looking at her dad's guns, and I was explaining gun safety and how you should never put your finger on the trigger. I then shot a hole in the floor of her house. FML

#14449374
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5303) - you deserved it (36194)

On 01/03/2011 at 6:18am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Alaska)

Today, my father had a dream that he'd lost me forever, and the pain was so unbearable, it woke him up. Turns out, the pain he was experiencing was just his bowels and he really needed to take a shit. This is the most affection I've ever received from my father. FML

#14398309
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22935) - you deserved it (2838)

On 12/30/2010 at 5:28pm - love - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, I tried to contact my birth mother, who abandoned me when I was three weeks old. After months of tracing, I finally plucked up the courage to call her. She told me to "f*ck off and die". FML

#14310097
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46701) - you deserved it (6335)

On 12/23/2010 at 11:13am - misc - by unfortunategeek - United Kingdom

Today, I was naked on top of my boyfriend looking lovingly into his eyes. He then started to use my boobs as punching bags while singing "Eye of the Tiger". FML

#14305984
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38590) - you deserved it (8374)

On 12/23/2010 at 1:36am - intimacy - by nemo518 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out that if I try to resist a 70 pound bulldog that's humping my leg, I will end up with stitches. FML

#14294130
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22212) - you deserved it (2144)

On 12/22/2010 at 2:54am - health - by Anonymous - United States



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: