geass_user

Search for a member

Offline (the 09/08/2014 at 8:46pm)

geass_user

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 25 April 1995 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2199
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About geass_user : meh.

geass_user's page activity

Visits<b>MostafaH</b> - the 03/06/2016 at 4:47pm<b>acs123acs</b> - the 09/23/2015 at 7:56am<b>seninaa</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 10:46am<b>Hempz</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 4:52pm<b>thatchick1405</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 1:28am<b>Andreeya</b> - the 06/20/2014 at 9:30am<b>Wizardo</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 10:31am<b>Ghost_Kaulitz</b> - the 04/25/2014 at 10:05pm<b>OhSnapItsSkyla</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 10:53pm<b>animalover9</b> - the 04/03/2014 at 10:28pm<b>madellen</b> - the 03/30/2014 at 11:44pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 03/25/2014 at 7:18pm<b>XxXBadAshXxX</b> - the 03/14/2014 at 2:39pm<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 03/08/2014 at 12:02pm<b>joshgwe</b> - the 03/06/2014 at 10:15pm<b>AUShano</b> - the 02/24/2014 at 1:10am<b>JMichael</b> - the 02/21/2014 at 6:22pm

geass_user's FML badges

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

See all of geass_user's badges

geass_user's favorite FMLs

Today, my boss called me over to his office; he wanted me to fire four hardworking employees. One of them was the girl I was going to ask out. FML

by AnonUser464 / 01/08/2013 at 11:40am / United States / Work

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. I was getting pretty horny, and I thought some dirty talk would turn him on. Amid my panting, I breathed the words, "Fuck me." He then stopped and said, "Excuse me, I don't like hearing that language." and wouldn't continue until I corrected myself. FML

by Anonymous / 12/24/2012 at 8:32am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I took my 5-year old daughter to get a photo taken with Santa, when she asked the dreaded question of why this Santa looked different from one at the other store. Before I could placate her, some cunt of a kid yelled, "Because he's not real, dumbass!" FML

by still had to pay / 12/23/2012 at 4:36pm / Australia / Kids

Today, my husband and I sat our 10-year-old daughter down for a chat over her recent cursing. When my husband asked where she'd heard the words, she "innocently" replied, "from mommy's other boyfriend." He took her seriously, accused me of cheating, and hasn't been home since. FML

by mandybar15 / 12/14/2012 at 6:52pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Love

Today, on the bus, when I was asking my 6-year-old son what he wanted for Christmas, a stranger came up to us and yelled at him about how Santa Claus is not real, that his "parents are fucking liars" and that he should "never listen to anything one of those fuckers says." FML

by n1a1t1h1a1n1 / 12/11/2012 at 2:15am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, my dad grounded me for two weeks for profusely swearing at my misbehaving laptop. After some arguing, he actually accepted my half-joking offer to play a game of CoD over it. His condition was that if I lost, my grounding period would double. We played. He kicked my ass. FML

by goodbye cruel world / 11/30/2012 at 8:28pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up to my balls covered in Icy Hot, a big old "fuck you" note from my girlfriend, and my door slamming shut. I'm starting to get the distinct impression I shouldn't have made that off-hand remark last night about her PMSing, after she rage-quit a game of Mario Kart. FML

by dumping time / 11/25/2012 at 5:38pm / United Kingdom (Kent) / Love

Today, a cute girl sitting next to me asked if she could use my phone. As I handed it to her, I attempted to use the expression "knock yourself out," but for a reason I can still not fathom, it came out as "kill yourself." FML

by Holy Testacles / 10/17/2012 at 12:45am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out why the girl I like won't give me the time of day. Apparently, I called her ugly and pushed her into a puddle when we were in kindergarten. FML

by thatwas10yearsago / 09/27/2012 at 10:41pm / United States (Virginia) / Love

Today, I was talking on the phone with my crush. After an hour of talking she told me, "If you were half as hot as you sound over the phone, I'd date you immediately." Maybe I should give up on love and start a phone sex line. FML

by annonymous / 09/19/2012 at 2:24am / United States / Intimacy

Today, someone brought cake to class. Trying to get some attention from the guy I have a crush on, I asked if he wanted my piece of cake. He accepted it, and then offered it to another girl. FML

by emselin / 09/18/2012 at 4:07pm / Denmark (Hovedstaden) / Love

Today, my crush asked to use my phone so he could Google something. Flattered that he wanted to use my phone, I agreed. After he was done, he handed it back with a weird look. I later realized he had found himself in my top searches. FML

by Gigi / 09/05/2012 at 12:29am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was shopping at a store with my friend, I noticed a cute girl smiling at us. My friend said "She's all yours," and walked away. When I approached her, she asked me if my friend was single. FML

by ZAS / 08/22/2012 at 12:57pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got a phone call out of the blue from a young man, who screamed that he was going to kill me for sleeping with his fiancée. I told him I am a 49-year-old man who hasn't been laid since my wife passed away, four years ago. He stammered, shouted "Well she was a slut too" and hung up. FML

by Anonymous / 08/17/2012 at 8:20pm / United States / Love

Today, I discovered that I'm adopted. How? After a great lunch, I asked my uncle how he'd made the salad dressing. He replied, "Haha! It's a secret family recipe, my dear!" I wouldn't have thought twice about it, were it not for my parents' shocked expressions, and the long, awkward silence. FML

by Lyn / 07/06/2012 at 6:14pm / France / Miscellaneous