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  • Number of visits : 458
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 17 posted

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gavinbanks's page activity

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gavinbanks's favorite FMLs

Today, I helped my brother propose to his girlfriend of 5 years in the spot where they had first met. As he delivered his heartfelt speech, a sizable crowd appeared. When he got down on one knee, she punched him in the gut, yelled, "I never loved you", and ran away. Now he won't talk to me. FML


I agree, your life sucks (51338) - you deserved it (3266)

On 09/18/2013 at 9:45pm - love - by ElizaZee (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I asked this really cute girl for her number. I had nothing else on me so I told her to write it on a dollar bill. Later, without thinking, I put it in a vending machine. I freaked out and frantically pushed the return button. It gave me back quarters. FML

Today, my son got expelled after using the photocopier to photocopy his penis. He then used the copies to replace every directional arrow posted throughout the school. FML


I agree, your life sucks (33091) - you deserved it (4917)

On 10/22/2012 at 2:56pm - kids - by thebeachisthatway (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend used various infomercial phrases like, "Wait, there's more!" during sex. FML


I agree, your life sucks (30981) - you deserved it (4668)

On 08/14/2012 at 1:16am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I finally had sex with the guy I've been in love with for the past two years. Five minutes in, he passed out on top of me from a pain pill overdose and had a mini seizure. He finally woke up and groans, "Those bastards! They confiscated my clothes!" FML


I agree, your life sucks (28892) - you deserved it (5087)

On 07/21/2012 at 3:40am - intimacy - by Lucy - United States (California)

Today, I had to collect my daughter from the hospital. Her boyfriend was even more upset than she was, because his iPhone's screen was damaged beyond repair when the doctor pulled it out of my daughter's vagina. FML


I agree, your life sucks (51447) - you deserved it (4803)

On 05/16/2012 at 12:10pm - intimacy - by smart move there (woman) - Ireland (Kildare)

Today, I have been awake so long I hallucinated a llama in my living room. I have a medical condition that keeps me from sleeping properly. I've run out of medication. I still see the llama. FML


I agree, your life sucks (34232) - you deserved it (2866)

On 04/17/2012 at 5:38am - health - by SeeingLlamas (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I had the sudden urge to sneeze as I was wiping my ass. Out of instinct, I used my hand to cover my mouth. I never let go of the toilet paper. FML


I agree, your life sucks (27524) - you deserved it (35131)

On 01/08/2010 at 1:48pm - misc - by Hugh_Jankles (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had a fight with my little sister. Later she apologized and made me dinner to make up for it. I thought it was pretty good until I found out that instead of using Parmesan cheese in the recipe, she used foot shavings from her Ped Egg. FML


I agree, your life sucks (63218) - you deserved it (6645)

On 07/22/2009 at 12:12am - misc - by vomitingnow (man) - United States

Today, I took home my grandpa's ashes. I then went out with my grandma, leaving my 5-year-old at home with my 12-year-old. When I got home, my beaming 5-year-old opened the door, covered in white powder. My grandmother asked where all the powder had come from. She pointed to the empty ashbox. FML


I agree, your life sucks (46616) - you deserved it (17083)

On 06/17/2009 at 10:40pm - love - by fcnk (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. I really get off on hearing her say my name so I was imagining her doing so more often than she actually was. I then called out my own name by accident. FML


I agree, your life sucks (29173) - you deserved it (100201)

On 05/07/2009 at 10:45am - intimacy - by eeh (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, in a very crowded public restroom at a sporting arena, after looking to the man using the urinal to his right, my 6 year old son turns to address me on his left and exclaims, "Daddy, that man's wiener is a lot bigger than yours!" The whole bathroom heard and looked immediately at me. FML


I agree, your life sucks (69241) - you deserved it (4092)

On 03/05/2009 at 8:51pm - kids - by SadDad - United States (Florida)

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