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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, while attempting a DIY pest removal, one of our tenants lit a skunk on fire. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14139) - you deserved it (1491)
On 03/09/2010 at 9:07pm - misc - by Al (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, I found out how mature the guy I'm seeing is. After sex, he took the condom off and hit me in the face with it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19561) - you deserved it (4175)
On 03/07/2010 at 9:08am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)
Today, an elderly lady swore at me for not holding a door open for her. The door in question was automatic. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17493) - you deserved it (1312)
On 03/03/2010 at 3:34pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Edinburgh)
Today, a really hot guy smacked my ass. I farted. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33672) - you deserved it (6914)
On 03/01/2010 at 5:04pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I was asked to take care of my 3 year old little brother. After 15 minutes of him screaming and me trying to keep him entertained, he started throwing his toy cars at me. He hit me in the mouth, and I started to bleed. My parents yelled at me for "not controlling him." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18802) - you deserved it (2397)
On 03/01/2010 at 2:09pm - kids - by moneyman22 - United States (New York)
Today, my boyfriend and I were asleep. Evidently, he was dreaming about being a UFC fighter, because, out of no where, he grabs the back of my head and punches me in the nose. I haven't been able to breathe right out of my nose all day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17965) - you deserved it (1847)
On 02/27/2010 at 11:06am - misc - by anonymous - United States
Today, I found out that my dad hides his Viagra from my mom by keeping it in an Aspirin container. Now I have a terrible headache and a boner. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23540) - you deserved it (2805)
On 11/23/2009 at 1:05pm - intimacy - by sickkid (man) - United States (California)
Today, during foreplay, I was trying to be sexy. But instead I fell off the bed, landed in the laundry basket, and was attacked by the dog. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11816) - you deserved it (3289)
On 09/10/2009 at 2:18am - intimacy - by Loveless (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was at a party when I got covered in the liquid from a glow stick. Thinking it wasn't a big deal I went to rub it off, but it stuck to my clothes. The cops came so everyone ran and hid in the bushes because we were all drunk. The cops arrested fifteen people because I glowed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10650) - you deserved it (29775)
On 09/05/2009 at 4:54pm - misc - by Idiots (man) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I got written up at work for making a customer feel bad. I made him feel bad by laughing uncontrollably at him when he asked if we sold real light sabers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37367) - you deserved it (9232)
On 08/31/2009 at 1:18am - work - by Timmah (man) - United States (Michigan)
Today, my friends and I decided to compare dick sizes one by one. I was last and I was the smallest. I was also the only Asian amongst my friends. They now call me "the stereotype". FML
I agree, your life sucks (32687) - you deserved it (19330)
On 07/30/2009 at 10:21am - intimacy - by verysadasian (man) - United States (Virginia) - moderated by the Jackass crew
Today, I told my boyfriend I was really horny. He then gave me the link to his favorite "porn". He said I should do it for him. It was a youtube video of some girl making a sandwich. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43542) - you deserved it (10412)
On 07/27/2009 at 1:06am - intimacy - by fmysexlife (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)
Today, as my boyfriend and I were messing around in his room he took off my underwear. As he was about to go down on me I spread my legs to help out then he looked up at me and said, "You got some toilet paper left behind." FML
I agree, your life sucks (31049) - you deserved it (44094)
On 06/14/2009 at 12:14am - intimacy - by BarbieKen (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, my boyfriend came over for dinner, but couldn't eat because he had just gotten his tongue pierced. My grandpa heard this, winked at my boyfriend and said "Can't eat now, but I bet that's all you'll be doing in a few weeks..." My super protective father was sitting right next to him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (66788) - you deserved it (6653)
On 03/24/2009 at 6:41am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, when I was shaving , I wanted to see what I looked like with a Hitler 'tache. Since I was shaving anyway I just left that part and figured I'd shave it later. Well I was goose stepping around my room for awhile and then forgot about it. I ran into my girlfriend's parents later that day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8001) - you deserved it (56314)
On 03/13/2009 at 1:03am - misc - by Noname (man) - United States (Colorado)
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