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gabythatcher's FML badges
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
gabythatcher's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 01/02/2016 at 5:31pm / United States / Intimacy
by badbitch23 / 12/07/2015 at 6:21pm / United States (Texas) / Love
Today, the girl I like at work surprised me in the otherwise empty break room. She caught me taking part in what might as well have been the Ball-Scratching Olympics. I didn't notice she was behind me until she cleared her throat to get my attention. Shit. FML
by ballthlete / 09/06/2015 at 12:55am / United States (Oklahoma) / Miscellaneous
Today, I screamed like a little girl and scrambled to climb atop the toilet seat when I saw a cockroach running around our bathroom. My 5-year-old nephew came in, slapped it to death and said not to be scared, because he'll always protect me. FML
by MyBallsForSaleOnEbay / 08/21/2015 at 11:25am / Malta / Kids
Today, after an argument with my girlfriend, I tried to be dramatic by slamming my car door shut as hard as I could. Something broke and now it won't open. Now I have to climb through the passenger's side just to drive my car to work. FML
by MerryDeathmas / 07/18/2015 at 12:31am / Canada (Saskatchewan) / Transportation
by Anonymous / 06/03/2015 at 1:01am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was supporting my aunt as she gave birth. She was getting tired during the pushing stage, so I tried to encourage her by making a show of pushing as well with each contraction. I got a little too into it and accidentally gave birth to a little turd of my own. FML
by nityasomaiya / 05/16/2015 at 1:34am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 05/15/2015 at 10:52pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by Random737193 / 05/07/2015 at 3:52pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love
by Ixlovexwaffles / 04/29/2015 at 4:33pm / Intimacy
by Drill Drilled / 04/15/2015 at 6:12pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went on a blind date at a restaurant. While looking at the menu, my date said "Who even likes kweetch? Gross." When I realized she was trying to say "quiche", I corrected her. That pissed her off. Now I'm at home, alone, trying to decide which hand is going to keep me company tonight. FML
by left, I guess / 04/12/2015 at 1:00pm / Canada (Nova Scotia) / Intimacy
Today, I made a speech in front of my entire graduating class and their families, despite my fear of public speaking. It seemed to go well and I got a big round of applause at the end. Then I panicked and instead of waving, I lifted my arm straight out in a Hitler salute. FML
by oooooops / 03/22/2015 at 8:32pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by tobuscus9412 / 03/21/2015 at 9:04pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 03/05/2015 at 10:19pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
- Today, I sent my boyfriend a dirty picture to turn him on. He texted back: "Jfc, why wud u tease me… Today, I'm here to inform men that, "If I fucked you, I wouldn't pull out" is not an effective pick… Today, while I was shaving my nether regions, my trimmer slipped and ate a chunk out of my balls,…