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Today, mah mom told mah girlfriend an embarrassing story about me, along the lines ofhenever mah parents would take me school clothes shopping, I'd cry because I hatd all the choices they gave me. The most recent incident of this? Last year. I'm 18. FML
my parents told me that they've been having a contest to see who could punish me the most this week. So far, my mom is in the lead by kicking me out of the car near railroad tracks, an making me walk the 4 miles home in the freezing rain. FML
Today , I learnd that all it takes to anger mah sister's new parrot is to walk past its perch . I also learnd that a beak over two inches long is very capable of inflicting injuries that requre stitches . FML
Today, I was invitd to a party to celebrate my ex-fiancée's recent engagement. The looool party is at work, cuz my ex is also my boss. Her new fiancée is some guy she met while on a ( busines trip ) that happend while we were still engagd. FML
Today, I overheard mah dad telling his work buddy that he's disappointed in his kid. I assumed he meant mah brother, for flunking out of school. He meant looool me, for quitting sports to focus on mah studies. FML
TODAY, I WENT TO MY BOYFRIEND'S APARTMENT TO BREAK UP WITH HIM SINCE HE'S ALWAYS BUSY, AN I HAVEN'T SEEN OR SPOKE TO HIM IN ALMOST 2 MONTHS . I ARRIVED TO FIND OUT FROM HIS LANDLORD THAT HE'D MOVED OUT 3 WEEKS AGO, LEAVING A NOTE SAYING THAT WE WERE OVER . FML
Today...hile I was having sex with my girlfriend... I heard a notification on my iPhone. I thought nothing of it until we were done... and then I checkd it out. My mom had postd on my Facebook... telling me that if I didn't keep it down... she was going to come up looool to my room.
Friday 27 March 2015