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gabrielbaby

Offline (the 01/18/2016 at 8:39pm) | Search for a member

gabrielbaby

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 8 July 1995 (20 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 4920
  • Number of comments : 220
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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gabrielbaby's favorite FMLs

Today, while lying in bed with my boyfriend after some steamy lovemaking, he sat up, slapped my ass with excruciating force, and screamed, "I AM THE THUNDER!" directly into my ear. It seems our senses of humor differ considerably. FML

#17984134
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32979) - you deserved it (6437)

On 10/14/2011 at 7:03pm - intimacy - by myasshurts - United States (Michigan)

Today, I realized the closest I've ever been to being hit on was with a car in the school parking lot. Even then, the guy claimed he "didn't notice" me. FML

#17983991
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26368) - you deserved it (2899)

On 10/14/2011 at 6:40pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I had to escort some dumbass teenager from Home Depot after I found him masturbating in one of the model washrooms. FML

#17982026
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41681) - you deserved it (3261)

On 10/14/2011 at 12:30pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Reserved

Today, for the first time, I beat my brother in a game of CoD. Not being a gamer, I was ecstatic. Later, when I was in the shower, my brother snuck in the bathroom, yelled "Napalm strike!" and threw our cat over the shower curtain like a furry grenade from hell. FML

#17981940
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49900) - you deserved it (5507)

On 10/14/2011 at 12:11pm - kids - by MLGreco - United States

Today, since I was taking a dump in my wife's parents' house, I lit a candle so that it wouldn't stink. While still sitting down, I went to blow it out and apparently, no matter how strong of a man you are, you will still scream like a little girl if hot wax falls on your penis. FML

#17981787
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36712) - you deserved it (11815)

On 10/14/2011 at 11:23am - intimacy - by cduran2011 - United States (Ohio)

Today, in the senior class I teach, I asked my students who had traveled outside of the country, excluding Canada and Mexico. One student raised his hand and proudly stated, "Arizona". He wants to be a doctor. FML

#17980491
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32173) - you deserved it (3252)

On 10/14/2011 at 2:42am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, my students took my glasses, hid them from me, and called me a turtle when I squinted my eyes trying to look for them. This carried on for about 25 minutes. FML

#17980365
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28955) - you deserved it (3882)

On 10/14/2011 at 2:09am - kids - by TurtleTeacher (man) - United States (Alaska)

Today, my brother in law got into a fight with my husband. My pregnant sister was yelling at her husband to stop beating my husband up. When I came into the room, I asked why they were fighting. You'll never guess who the real father of my sister's baby is. FML

#17977094
278 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69266) - you deserved it (3516)

On 10/13/2011 at 7:20pm - love - by Good sister (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was on a drive with my uncle. We saw a dead deer on the side of the road and expressed our pity for it. Then a squirrel runs across the road and my uncle swerves toward the squirrel, laughing hysterically and yelling, "Run rodent run." FML

#17965176
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27832) - you deserved it (4047)

On 10/12/2011 at 1:14am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was accused of masturbating during work. I was actually just getting something out of my pocket. FML

#17962463
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32524) - you deserved it (3395)

On 10/11/2011 at 8:19pm - intimacy - by dinosaucer - United States (Delaware)

Today, I was accused of masturbating during work. I was actually just getting something out of my pocket. FML

#17962463
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32524) - you deserved it (3395)

On 10/11/2011 at 8:19pm - intimacy - by dinosaucer - United States (Delaware)

Today, after being admitted to the emergency room for severe abdominal pain, my boyfriend shouted out in front of my parents, "At least she isn't pregnant!" FML

#17959837
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27702) - you deserved it (3225)

On 10/11/2011 at 1:43pm - health - by letmedienow - United States

Today, I realized that the redneck, hick, abusive family that my co-workers always joke about is my family. FML

#17958563
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27577) - you deserved it (3771)

On 10/11/2011 at 7:52am - work - by anon - United States

Today, in the middle of explaining over the phone to my crush how I felt about him, I got a text from his best friend, who was apparently with him at the time. It said, "He doesn't like you, get over it. Stop rambling." FML

#17958014
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34985) - you deserved it (5800)

On 10/11/2011 at 3:32am - love - by poopooppachuu - United States (California)

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house. I really had to use the bathroom, but decided to wait. After about an hour, I went to the restroom. I pissed for so long that when I walked out her family all started clapping. FML

#17954920
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29702) - you deserved it (6332)

On 10/10/2011 at 8:58pm - health - by maniac11 - United States (Texas)



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