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Judgmental
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Today, both my brother and sister missed my wedding. She was playing in a Call of Duty tournament, and he got so high that he forgot about the wedding completely. He was my best man. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40546) - you deserved it (2332)
On 01/14/2013 at 12:36pm - misc - by What a happy day (man) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, my girlfriend returned home from a several week vacation with family. Instead of a happy reunion, I was terribly emasculated, publicly, for bringing flowers that "weren't as pretty as all the other couples' in baggage claim." FML
I agree, your life sucks (26891) - you deserved it (2267)
On 01/14/2013 at 10:47am - misc - by badenoughflowers - United States (Texas)
Today, I was at a party with my crush. The collar on his shirt was sticking up so I fixed it for him. He gave me a hug and said, "Aww you're so good to me. You're like my mother. You can be my college mother." I got mother-zoned. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39787) - you deserved it (4976)
On 01/14/2013 at 7:56am - love - by shiney100893 (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)
Today, my mum excitedly discussed with me the prospect of starting a mother-son YouTube duo. Thinking she was joking, I went along with it. She is now installing a 24-hour webcam in the house to record our conversations, which she perceives as hilarious, and is going to upload them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26599) - you deserved it (6889)
On 01/14/2013 at 5:06am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I walked into the bathroom only to see my boyfriend sitting on the floor eating ice cream, crying. I'd say I was shocked, but this isn't the first time it's happened. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26509) - you deserved it (4693)
On 01/14/2013 at 3:24am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Montana)
Today, while living in Florida, I had a conversation with my mother explaining that it might be best for me to come back home. Her response, "Don't worry, they have plenty of homeless shelters down there if you need a place to stay." Thanks Mom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22433) - you deserved it (2441)
On 01/14/2013 at 1:51am - misc - by living_thedream (man) - United States (New York)
Today, while making dinner I cut my finger badly with a knife. When I yelled for my dad to drive me to the hospital, he accused me of lying to get attention. He had to taste my blood before he decided it wasn't red-colored corn syrup. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29524) - you deserved it (2636)
On 01/14/2013 at 12:52am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)
Today, my vegan boyfriend told me that if he were forced to kill either his cat or me, he'd kill me because he "would never kill an animal." FML
I agree, your life sucks (28918) - you deserved it (5481)
On 01/13/2013 at 11:49pm - animals - by Abendigo77 (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I had to explain to my husband that the 5-second rule doesn't apply if you drop the floss into the toilet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27540) - you deserved it (1961)
On 01/13/2013 at 10:36pm - misc - by PeeFlavouredFloss (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, I walked into my mother's house to find that she had knitted clothes for some of the household appliances. The toaster was wearing a dress. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23410) - you deserved it (2074)
On 01/13/2013 at 10:00pm - misc - by anon - United States (Ohio)
Today, while out grocery shopping together, my mom decided it was a great time to describe in vivid detail how, when she was breast feeding me, milk would pour out of her nipple piercing holes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27468) - you deserved it (2374)
On 01/13/2013 at 7:42pm - intimacy - by Gingerdoesafacepalm (woman) - United States (California)
Today, as per usual, my mother went to see her psychic, who told her that one of her children is harbouring a "dark secret". Now we're all grounded until one of us confesses our obviously non-existent secret. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28699) - you deserved it (1537)
On 01/13/2013 at 4:02pm - misc - by daughter of a gullible cunt (woman) - Australia
Today, the girl of my dreams asked me if I wanted to go biking with her. "Just the two of us," she said. I had to turn her down because I'm 17 years old and never learned how to ride a bike. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20369) - you deserved it (24951)
On 01/13/2013 at 1:25pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I decided to go to a UV-light party dressed all in white. Before leaving, my little brother dumped a glass of tomato juice over my head saying, "Now you look just like a used tampon!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (33063) - you deserved it (4313)
On 01/13/2013 at 10:49am - misc - by Mary - Czech Republic
Today, while trying to quietly sneak a midnight snack with my girlfriend, I was slowly opening the pantry door so I wouldn't wake my mother. My girlfriend came and swung open the door onto my foot, taking the top layer of skin with it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25387) - you deserved it (3454)
On 01/13/2013 at 7:41am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Monday 20 May 2013
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