About gabbehtm : I eat, breathe, sleep nursing school.
Judgmental
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
Between your Facebook account and your FML account, things are no longer complicated: their relationship is official. We like this.
A new Thumb
You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
Today, I was at the beach with my buddy. Messing around, he swam up behind me and dunked me under the water. Naturally, moments later I swam behind him, grabbed both his ankles and stood up, flipping him completely, only to see him watching me from a few feet away. I flipped a 70 year old man. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14240) - you deserved it (39579)
On 02/27/2009 at 1:03am - misc - by beachbum (man) - United States (New York)
Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try anal sex. When he was done, I turned around to see him holding a strap-on with a smile on his face and said 'Now, do me'. FML
I agree, your life sucks (209734) - you deserved it (45110)
On 02/26/2009 at 12:57pm - intimacy - by Picaresque (woman) - United States (Missouri)
Today, I had the cops called on me because I accidentally texted "I'm going to kill you and use your head as hood ornament" to my ex-fiancé, instead of my best friend. I only texted that because he got a better grade on an exam than me. Now I have a court date. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24450) - you deserved it (35459)
On 02/25/2009 at 2:05pm - misc - by Joe (man) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I asked my dad if he could fix my bed. It had been squeaking for some time. He shook his head no. He then continued with, "Your bed is a security system and as far as I can tell, you haven't gotten any in weeks". FML
I agree, your life sucks (37809) - you deserved it (3686)
On 02/24/2009 at 1:13pm - misc - by Noname - United States (Florida)
Today, I was DJ'ing a wedding. The groom wanted a song played for his grandma and grandpa. I announce over the microphone for his grandparents to come to the dance floor for a special song. Turns out his grandparents have been dead for over a year and the song was supposed to be in dedication. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41488) - you deserved it (7679)
On 02/23/2009 at 7:04pm - misc - by holladaddy (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blowjob, which I don't normally do because I have a fear of getting hit in the eye. Afterwards, I went to suck a lemon to get the taste out of my mouth. Sure enough, I bit the wrong spot and had lemon juice shoot right into my eye. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23482) - you deserved it (67269)
On 02/21/2009 at 9:07pm - intimacy - by svet (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I got an email from my professor with my grade for a paper. It said, "Solid writing, but you should have proofread your final draft more carefully." In a moment of annoyance, I typed in the reply box, "God should have proofread your FACE more carefully." My elbow hit the send button. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11695) - you deserved it (48575)
On 02/21/2009 at 4:43pm - misc - by Noname - United States (Texas)
Today, I found a note in my locker from a really hot guy asking me to prom. I went up to him saying how excited I was to go. He said "Oh you got the note?" and slipped it into the locker next to me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33803) - you deserved it (1753)
On 02/20/2009 at 1:42pm - misc - by caitiexob - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I walked through my college dorm and a freshman was watching some overly dramatic show on her laptop. I smiled and asked if it was a new episode of 'Gossip Girl.' She was on a video chat with her boyfriend. They were about to break up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8815) - you deserved it (33863)
On 02/19/2009 at 12:22am - love - by baddormgirl (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I was masturbating on my inflatable air mattress that squeaks when you move. Suddenly, my mom busted in my room to ask if I'm okay because she thought the squeaking was my crying. I ripped my hands from my pants and turned on my side; she walked over and grabbed my hands to console me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21157) - you deserved it (52701)
On 02/18/2009 at 6:01pm - intimacy - by dirtyhands (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I was secretly listening to a voicemail from my mom in maths class when I accidentally hit the speaker phone button. My whole math class now knows I have a gyno appointment at 9:45 on March 11. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10354) - you deserved it (38074)
On 02/18/2009 at 10:43am - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, at the gym, I see a person laying unconscious on the ground with people crowded around. Previously being a lifeguard, and knowing CPR, I ran over and asked a man what happened, preparing to check his vitals. I then realized that the body was a dummy and the employees were doing a drill. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10690) - you deserved it (21192)
On 02/16/2009 at 12:35am - misc - by thedullard (man) - United States (Indiana)
Today, I got my boyfriend a pair of concert tickets for his birthday. He loved the gift, but turned to me and said "Do I have to bring you?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (29863) - you deserved it (2488)
On 02/13/2009 at 2:18pm - misc - by sarahhh (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, my boss called me into his office to show me the web site of a potential business partner. When he began to type 'virginia' into google, it auto-completed his search with his recent search for 'virgin boy assholes'. I have to go on business trip with him tomorrow. I'm a young guy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (416563) - you deserved it (26647)
On 02/13/2009 at 10:54am - intimacy - by The Sbeak (man) - United States (Rhode Island)
Today, I was sitting at home, venting to my parents about how I never get asked out by any of the guys at school. My Dads words of wisdom were "Don't worry, looks don't matter so much in college. Once they've had a few beers in them, they'll date anything." FML
I agree, your life sucks (38267) - you deserved it (3203)
On 02/12/2009 at 12:15pm - misc - by cdaniel2 (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Monday 17 June 2013
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