About gabbehtm : I eat, breathe, sleep nursing school.
Judgmental
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
Between your Facebook account and your FML account, things are no longer complicated: their relationship is official. We like this.
A new Thumb
You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
Today, I was at my job in the Dean of Students office. My boss gave me some papers to copy. As I was copying, I read in a report that my boyfriend was written up for "cohabitation" (having a girl stay over) at my Catholic university. The report was from a weekend I wasn't at school. FML
I agree, your life sucks (66346) - you deserved it (3088)
On 03/18/2009 at 12:07am - work - by germx (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. After three long weeks of him ignoring me and cancelling out on time we were supposed to spend with each other. He looked at me with the most confused look on his face. Then he says ''Are you serious? I was planning the perfect day to ask you to marry me'' FML
I agree, your life sucks (29245) - you deserved it (71966)
On 03/17/2009 at 10:20am - misc - by PinkTornado - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I texted my boyfriend of 6 months saying that I was in the mood, and that I was in bed, and naked. He texted back saying "U got fingers, use them, im going to bed xoxo". FML
I agree, your life sucks (114252) - you deserved it (28261)
On 03/17/2009 at 1:06am - intimacy - by princess (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, I texted my boyfriend of 6 months saying that I was in the mood, and that I was in bed, and naked. He texted back saying "U got fingers, use them, im going to bed xoxo". FML
I agree, your life sucks (114252) - you deserved it (28261)
On 03/17/2009 at 1:06am - intimacy - by princess (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, I was sifting through my parents old home movies. I put in one and was horrified to see my parents having sex. I immediately ejected the tape and looked at the label. It said "Bermuda, 1989". They've told me I was conceived in Bermuda around that time. I've seen my own conception. FML
I agree, your life sucks (143557) - you deserved it (25696)
On 03/16/2009 at 7:08pm - intimacy - by ihatevideos (man) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I was out with my friend. My six year old daughter was also with us. While we were walking through the parking lot, my daughter asked me in a very loud voice "Mommy, does a blow job taste bad?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (63856) - you deserved it (12806)
On 03/15/2009 at 10:18pm - intimacy - by hala (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I went to a birthday party for my friend's daughter. I picked up a gift for the girl and another for her parents. I got the mother a cute little garden stone that read "What our children see in the world depends on what we show them." Later, I found out her daughter is blind. FML
I agree, your life sucks (57450) - you deserved it (14076)
On 03/15/2009 at 1:39am - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, after taping 5-year-olds do a skit at an improv camp, I used the camera's view-finder to zoom in on a female co-worker's chest. Another female co-worker tapped me on the shoulder to show that the TV was still connected to the camera. Parents, kids, and instructors all witnessed it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9899) - you deserved it (97837)
On 03/13/2009 at 9:06pm - misc - by Noname - United States (Arkansas)
Today, I found an obituary clipping on my kitchen table. It was for my grandpa. No one told me he died. FML
I agree, your life sucks (90348) - you deserved it (3186)
On 03/13/2009 at 1:30am - misc - by depresso (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my girlfriend was giving me head while I was watching Star Trek and I accidentally called her Spock. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40999) - you deserved it (247282)
On 03/12/2009 at 5:30am - intimacy - by Noname (man) - New Zealand (Canterbury)
Today, my roommate got mad at me for putting away the tampons that were sitting on her desk. She rebelled by hanging hundreds of tampons dyed red from every surface in our dorm room. I discovered this while giving my mom her first tour of the place. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48382) - you deserved it (4110)
On 03/11/2009 at 9:38am - misc - by powsser (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, while showering in my dorm, a hand reaches through the curtain and grabs my ass. I hit the person on the other side of the curtain. He opened the curtain thinking that I was his girlfriend. He apologized and he had sex with his girlfriend in the shower stall next to me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (60331) - you deserved it (2259)
On 03/11/2009 at 3:37am - intimacy - by Noname (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, while showering in my dorm, a hand reaches through the curtain and grabs my ass. I hit the person on the other side of the curtain. He opened the curtain thinking that I was his girlfriend. He apologized and he had sex with his girlfriend in the shower stall next to me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (60331) - you deserved it (2259)
On 03/11/2009 at 3:37am - intimacy - by Noname (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, my mom walked in on me masturbating. I minimized the porn on my laptop so she wouldn't see I was watching it. It turns out I was watching an old Beatles concert before I started masturbating. My mom thought I was masturbating to the Beatles. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19901) - you deserved it (63828)
On 03/11/2009 at 12:42am - intimacy - by theassman (man) - United States (Missouri)
Today, I was at work and a very obese woman came in to get a pedicure. When she took her shoes off I noticed an odd black substance on her feet. I started scrubbing it off and wondered out loud, "What IS this stuff??" As a chunk of it fell onto my lip, she replied, "Girl, that's just the fungus." FML
I agree, your life sucks (87780) - you deserved it (5214)
On 03/10/2009 at 7:55am - work - by SalonGirl (woman) - United States (California)
Monday 20 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
