About gabbehtm : I eat, breathe, sleep nursing school.
Judgmental
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Between your Facebook account and your FML account, things are no longer complicated: their relationship is official. We like this.
A new Thumb
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Today, a guy said to me, "I'd really love to see that smile back at my place." Trying to be cute, I asked him if he was single. He replied with, "No, but I am a dentist. I could definitely fix that crossbite." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17040) - you deserved it (2428)
On 08/05/2012 at 1:23am - health - by wut (woman) - United States
Today, I learned that when you hear a bump in the night, it's best not to check your parents' room. Some things cannot be unseen. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10919) - you deserved it (12615)
On 08/04/2012 at 2:56am - misc - by alyssabree42 - United States (Oregon)
Today, I got on an elevator at the mall, along with a twelve or thirteen-year-old girl talking on her cell. She spent the whole ride telling the person on the other end how hideous I looked and how I look like a pregnant sperm whale. I was too humiliated to even say anything. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21678) - you deserved it (2934)
On 08/03/2012 at 9:52pm - kids - by pimpslaprequired (man) - United States
Today, my girlfriend opened my refrigerator and began her standard moan: "You're a pig, you never clean up. Look at that egg, it makes me want to throw up, it's gone black, it’s covered in fuzz, IT'S GOT HAIR ON IT!" I got up to check it out. It was a Kiwi fruit. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29494) - you deserved it (2909) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 08/02/2012 at 9:00am - love - by opinaise - France (Midi-Pyrenees)
Today, one of the human turds that I stupidly added on Facebook posted how terrible her life is after her dad refused to arrange yet another holiday for her this year, so I bitched her out for being such a spoiled little brat. A few hours later, her boyfriend came over and beat the shit out of me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22170) - you deserved it (22002)
On 08/01/2012 at 4:59pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Bedfordshire)
Today, I tried to explain to my daughter why she couldn’t have a sleepover with her boyfriend yet. She said, "If you're so worried about me having sex, then you failed as a father because I've already banged four guys." FML
I agree, your life sucks (45386) - you deserved it (7530)
On 08/01/2012 at 12:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada
Today, I woke up to find my cat has gone into heat. Her favorite thing to do right now is sticking her ass in my face and howling like a Nazgûl. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13962) - you deserved it (2879)
On 07/30/2012 at 2:05pm - animals - by soph511 (woman) - France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur)
Today, everyone found out about the strange but intense fetish I have for women physically lifting me. It all came out when my friend, a female bodybuilder, decided to grab and pick me up for a laugh. I came in my pants, in front of about twenty people. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30123) - you deserved it (6961)
On 07/25/2012 at 12:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, everyone found out about the strange but intense fetish I have for women physically lifting me. It all came out when my friend, a female bodybuilder, decided to grab and pick me up for a laugh. I came in my pants, in front of about twenty people. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30123) - you deserved it (6961)
On 07/25/2012 at 12:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I told my son to go clean his mess of a room. He yelled, "Dobby has no master! Dobby is a free elf!" and walked off. He turned 18 a week ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20324) - you deserved it (9447)
On 07/25/2012 at 6:54am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, a customer punched me in the face for repeating their order back to them because they thought I was making fun of their speech impediment. I have the same speech impediment. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27767) - you deserved it (1293)
On 07/24/2012 at 9:37pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I was in the hospital. I had recently broken my arm, and had to have it re-broken. I've secretly been a lesbian for years. Guess who came out to her strict Christian parents while on anesthetics. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23910) - you deserved it (3037)
On 07/24/2012 at 7:44pm - love - by Arthurie (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my mother bitched me out for not finishing my laundry. I'm a 37-year-old mother of three. She rents my basement suite. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16080) - you deserved it (1586)
On 07/24/2012 at 4:25pm - misc - by Gremlinswife (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I went to my local coffee shop. I soon witnessed the girl making my drink apparently dislodge a wedgie from her ass-crack and then sneeze into her hands. When I confronted her, she loudly accused me of "visually molesting" her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18327) - you deserved it (1332)
On 07/22/2012 at 12:48pm - misc - by bitchimgay (man) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, my neighbors bought a signal scrambler to stop their kids from going on the internet at night. Too bad it blocks my internet too. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20626) - you deserved it (1461)
On 07/22/2012 at 9:57am - misc - by XxFA1LxX - Canada (Alberta)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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