About gabbehtm : I eat, breathe, sleep nursing school.
Judgmental
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Today, I purposely misspelled words while texting my boyfriend so he would think I was out partying and having a life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6581) - you deserved it (20100)
On 08/29/2012 at 9:33pm - misc - by nolife - United States (Virginia)
Today, while getting pretty intimate with my newlywed wife in the car, a cop turned his lights on. As he was walking up, I was trying to get my pants back on but they wouldn't fit over my knees. The cop just laughed and walked away. Turns out my wife had my pants on and I was trying to put hers on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20000) - you deserved it (4783)
On 08/29/2012 at 5:37pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my boyfriend texted me, saying, "I'm running a bath. Wanna come over and learn about water displacement?" I excitedly drove over, thinking he wanted to have some fun. No, he really did want to teach me about water displacement. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22037) - you deserved it (4119)
On 08/29/2012 at 12:38pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)
Today, I announced to my boyfriend that I'm pregnant. He immediately denied that it was his because "a childhood accident" supposedly left him sterile. He has a child from a previous relationship. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18780) - you deserved it (3790)
On 08/28/2012 at 7:08pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)
Today, my wife and I got in a 4-hour heated argument which resulted in her begging for a divorce and admitting that she cheated on me. This all started with us arguing about the instructions for our new IKEA table. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21700) - you deserved it (1541)
On 08/26/2012 at 10:56pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, the office I work at put up a "No Masturbating at Desks" sign. I'm disappointed by this, not because I usually whack off at my desk, but because enough people do that there needs to be a sign against it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19503) - you deserved it (2465)
On 08/26/2012 at 7:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I accidentally decoded the system my parents use for talking about sex while I'm around. It's a substituion cipher, using literary references. As they're both lit. professors, this has me perpetually grossed-out and wondering, "Are they really talking about Anne Frank, or anal fisting?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (17384) - you deserved it (1307)
On 08/26/2012 at 5:21am - misc - by ewww (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I have a heart condition that causes migraines and fainting, so I take salt tablets to stop the fainting. The migraines can lead to a stroke, so I have medication for them. The medication has a side effect: fainting. And to avoid migraines, I should avoid salt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25889) - you deserved it (1004)
On 08/24/2012 at 12:08am - health - by Neurocardiogenic Syncope - Canada
Today, instead of staying home, I took an hour-long bus ride in the middle of the night to my girlfriend's place because on the phone she said, "I desperately need your body right now". It turned out she was just cold. She is also on her period. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11270) - you deserved it (20330)
On 08/23/2012 at 2:09pm - intimacy - by Rotarius (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, instead of staying home, I took an hour-long bus ride in the middle of the night to my girlfriend's place because on the phone she said, "I desperately need your body right now". It turned out she was just cold. She is also on her period. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11270) - you deserved it (20330)
On 08/23/2012 at 2:09pm - intimacy - by Rotarius (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my boyfriend and I broke up. I was pretty upset, so one of my guy friends offered to comfort me and get some ice cream. Apparently his definition of "comforting" is to feel my tits and try to get me to give him head. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24134) - you deserved it (3726)
On 08/21/2012 at 9:59pm - intimacy - by m (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I had to bail on yet another date with an awesome guy. Every time I make a date, my hateful mother slips laxatives into my food so I'm glued to the shitter until 2am. This is the fourth time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24501) - you deserved it (2349)
On 08/19/2012 at 11:53pm - love - by Lauren - United States (Iowa)
Today, I found out that my new husband is expecting two children: ours, due in January, and our 16-year-old neighbor's, due in March. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48973) - you deserved it (2183)
On 08/18/2012 at 1:09am - misc - by Just_Me_88 - United States (Oregon)
Today, I was giving my boyfriend head on the living room couch. Apparently his two cats didn't approve, and they started attacking my face. Luckily for him, since my boyfriend was holding my head down, his privates didn't get a scratch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18544) - you deserved it (3435)
On 08/15/2012 at 1:15pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)
Today, it finally clicked in my mind how desperately lonely I am, when I shaved one of my legs just to find out what a woman's leg feels like. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17418) - you deserved it (5637)
On 08/15/2012 at 12:46pm - love - by lonely. (man) - United States (New York)
Friday 24 May 2013
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