This member hasn't filled in the description.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Judgmental
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
Today, while I was sleeping, my girlfriend took my phone and set the ringtone to a bloodcurdling scream. I found this out when I received a call while driving to work and, thinking someone was being murdered in my backseat, I panicked and swerved into a parked car. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31296) - you deserved it (3995)
On 06/01/2011 at 7:53am - misc - by iscreamforicecream (man) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I told my boss I was too sick to come to work. He asked if I had a late night so I told him I stayed in. Apparently I ran into him at a bar last night and was too drunk to remember it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6853) - you deserved it (38392)
On 04/05/2011 at 3:30am - work - by randa -
Today, my younger brother called me saying he's getting married. Now, I have to attend my ex's wedding. I'm the best man. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29511) - you deserved it (2101)
On 12/17/2010 at 10:07pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I tried on the new dress I bought for myself. I, for once, thought I looked pretty all right. I asked my dog, "How do I look?" and she threw up on my pillow. My brother can't stop laughing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22166) - you deserved it (3509)
On 11/14/2010 at 4:42am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I took some friends out to the woods to show them a natural spring. I explained to them that the water bubbles up from under ground, and that it's clean and tasty. I bent down and drank a few hefty handfuls only to look up and see a dead raccoon floating near me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16658) - you deserved it (15096)
On 09/05/2010 at 1:22am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, I was taking care of a friend's hamster. Thinking the hamster wanted to make a bed, I put some cotton balls in his cage so he would be comfy. He promptly ate them and died. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11388) - you deserved it (25991)
On 08/28/2010 at 12:56am - animals - by Kelli (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I got wii fit, wii Mario kart and wii Mario galaxy for my birthday, I don't have a wii. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27629) - you deserved it (3312)
On 08/19/2010 at 8:02am - misc - by ktin - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I walked into my bedroom, only to find out that my bed is missing. I have no idea where it is. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34118) - you deserved it (426)
On 08/04/2010 at 1:18am - misc - by Username - Sent from mobile version
Today, I was showing a house to a couple who were interested in buying. At least they "were" interested until they opened the blinds, looked out of the bedroom window and saw the neighbor on the toilet taking a dump. He was naked. He was hairy. He smiled and waved. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27295) - you deserved it (2314)
On 07/25/2010 at 8:07pm - work - by anon (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I saw my crush standing at the bus stop. I did the "I'm talking to someone on the phone thing," trying to be cool. Halfway through the conversation my phone actually rang, I quickly answered but it was my mom on loudspeaker yelling, "Did you bring your tampons?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (7695) - you deserved it (25272)
On 02/20/2010 at 8:58am - misc - by Rach (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)
Today, my female room-mate decided to throw away my xbox, along with a few other possessions because they reminded her of her ex. Furiously, I asked her if "it was that time of the month again." Now I can't feel my balls, and miss my games. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29623) - you deserved it (9244)
On 01/19/2010 at 10:59pm - misc - by NYCguy (man) - United States (New York)
Today, my grandpa was wearing flip flops and white socks. He entered my restroom, and the moment he did it, I realized there was no toilet paper left. I felt too ashamed to interrupt his dump, so I waited for him to ask for paper, he never did and came out without socks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22262) - you deserved it (3567)
On 12/10/2009 at 4:03pm - misc - by dayum (man) - Mexico (Chihuahua)
Today, I went to the movies. Not only did the movie end up being awful, but I came to my car to find out someone drew Squidward from "SpongeBob" with large letters spelling "I LIKE POTATOES!" on my windshield. In permanent marker. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21323) - you deserved it (2117)
On 11/14/2009 at 6:08am - misc - by squidwardpotatoes (woman) - United States (California)
Today, while shopping for some bananas at my local grocery store, an old woman came up to me and started rubbing my stomach. She simply asked when I was due. I am a 43 year old man with a beer belly. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27725) - you deserved it (10478)
On 10/24/2009 at 6:24pm - misc - by fmlifetime (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I decided to lay out topless in my fenced-in backyard. For about an hour, everything was going great until I sneezed and my creepy, middle-aged neighbor said "bless you". From my bushes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41462) - you deserved it (12285)
On 09/02/2009 at 1:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Monday 20 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
