funnyguy2697

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funnyguy2697

0Fucked!

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  • Birth Date : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 4485
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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funnyguy2697's page activity

Visits<b>Vinix</b> - the 07/20/2013 at 5:09pm<b>ButterflyLadyBug</b> - the 03/17/2013 at 3:14pm<b>EatADonut_</b> - the 03/10/2013 at 7:15am<b>laurenclarkson95</b> - the 03/10/2013 at 6:31am<b>SillyGirl4602</b> - the 03/10/2013 at 3:05am<b>hooligyn123</b> - the 03/09/2013 at 10:29pm<b>MNBOY16</b> - the 01/01/2013 at 7:51pm<b>klc20071989</b> - the 12/25/2012 at 6:34pm<b>Lauren324</b> - the 12/25/2012 at 3:37pm<b>phatdaddy62</b> - the 12/25/2012 at 2:32pm

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funnyguy2697's favorite FMLs

Today, I met my biological parents for the first time. Their justification for giving me up for adoption was that I wasn't conceived at the ideal time for them. Apparently, the ideal time was six months after the adoption, when they conceived the first of my two brothers. FML

by pon-3 / 06/22/2012 at 5:13pm / United Kingdom (Derby) / Kids

Today, my parents made a list of all the things they could have done had I not been born. FML

by theunborn / 06/19/2012 at 12:42pm / France (Midi-Pyrenees) / Intimacy

Today, my grandmother threatened to kill herself with a banana. She then got angry with me when I didn't attempt to get the banana away from her. My mom punished me because I didn't take the situation seriously enough. FML

by DwarfFrog / 06/18/2012 at 7:38am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML

by 16590 / 06/15/2012 at 6:13pm / Sweden / Transportation

Today, I tried to go to the gym, but I ended up watching cat videos on YouTube for three hours. FML

by latino14 / 06/15/2012 at 7:27am / United States (Maryland) / Health

Today, while driving home from work, I noticed the driver next to me was happily chatting on her phone. I fucking despise these would-be murderers, so I slammed my horn to signal my disgust. She panicked and swerved straight into my car. FML

by k / 06/09/2012 at 5:35pm / United Kingdom (Telford and Wrekin) / Transportation

Today, I was at work, reading some funny stories on my phone. Just as one of my co-workers decided to share that his father had passed away recently, I burst into uncontrollable, teary-eyed laughter at a story. They don't believe my explanation, and have branded me the office asshole. FML

by Anonymous / 06/05/2012 at 2:47pm / Brazil (Sao Paulo) / Work

Today, my 24-year-old brother tried to convince me that Hogwarts is real, because there is no way a person could have written that based on imagination. My parents agreed with him. FML

by nanall / 06/04/2012 at 3:19am / United States / Kids

Today, my parents grounded me for finding their stash of weed. The irony is killing me right now. FML

by ironyisabitch / 06/02/2012 at 1:43am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, Child Protective Services came to my house, because my 7-year-old son told people at school that he was uncomfortable sleeping in his uncle's bed. I had to explain to them that the uncle in question died 2 years ago, and that's why it felt weird. FML

by Anonymous / 06/01/2012 at 3:02am / United States / Kids

Today, my little brother got his crush to go out with him by impressing her with his level 500 FarmVille. This is the next generation. FML

by Discouraged / 05/31/2012 at 8:43am / United States (Maryland) / Kids

Today, my daughter was still acting out her teenage issues. This morning, when I told her to, "Have a nice day" she screamed at me, "DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO!" FML

by Aldoch / 05/30/2012 at 6:41pm / Kids

Today, on Facebook, my sister posted a ton of photos of herself wearing a skimpy bikini, commenting that she looked hideous and fat. I can't stand attention-seeking fuckballs, so I called her on it. My mother then condemned me for "mocking" my sister, and grounded me for an entire month. FML

by namenlos / 05/27/2012 at 5:53pm / Australia / Miscellaneous

Today, at work, my friend dared me to answer the next call on my phone by saying, "This is your local sperm bank. You jack it, we pack it." I did it. The person on the phone was my boss. FML

by girly girly / 05/26/2012 at 10:42am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, my friends switched my mom and my girlfriend's numbers in my phone. I sexted my mom. FML

by ilovemymomma / 05/26/2012 at 3:15am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy