Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

funnyguy2697

Search for a member

funnyguy2697

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2160
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

funnyguy2697's page activity

Visits<b>Vinix</b> - the 07/20/2013 at 5:09pm<b>ButterflyLadyBug</b> - the 03/17/2013 at 3:14pm<b>EatADonut_</b> - the 03/10/2013 at 7:15am<b>laurenclarkson95</b> - the 03/10/2013 at 6:31am<b>SillyGirl4602</b> - the 03/10/2013 at 3:05am<b>hooligyn123</b> - the 03/09/2013 at 10:29pm<b>MNBOY16</b> - the 01/01/2013 at 7:51pm<b>klc20071989</b> - the 12/25/2012 at 6:34pm<b>Lauren324</b> - the 12/25/2012 at 3:37pm<b>phatdaddy62</b> - the 12/25/2012 at 2:32pm

funnyguy2697's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

See all of funnyguy2697's badges

funnyguy2697's favorite FMLs

Today, while having a sneak through my brother's browser, I found a bookmark for a Google Docs file. It was a short story involving him horrifically killing our entire family. It ended with the words: "And that is what happens when people don't respect the author's privacy." FML

#21073315
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25326) - you deserved it (55625)

On 02/27/2014 at 4:46pm - misc - by well SHIT (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was grading work my students had done with a sub. I realized one student had gotten hold of the teachers' edition of the textbook when I read ten papers in a row that had "Student answers may vary" as the answer to problem number four. My students can't even cheat properly. FML

#21061154
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51055) - you deserved it (5072)

On 02/15/2014 at 2:11am - work - by chinaski7628 - United States (California)

Today, trying to be a responsible parent, I bought my daughter a pack of condoms in case she ever decided to have sex. She turned them into balloon animals and went back to playing video games. FML

#21059009
290 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31612) - you deserved it (47736)

On 02/13/2014 at 10:47am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, as a priest's helper in church, I was giving Communion. It took me three people to realize that every time I was giving them the Eucharist, I was saying, "May the force be with you". FML

#21041278
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41467) - you deserved it (12510)

On 01/26/2014 at 11:37pm - work - by sabz21 - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was taking a piss when a fly landed inside the urinal. I thought it would be funny to try to aim and pee on it until it flew away and I stupidly continued aiming, peeing all over the floor and the wall. Another man came in time to see it. FML

#21026318
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21818) - you deserved it (48604)

On 01/13/2014 at 2:34am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Hawaii)

Today, after working my shift at McDonalds, I went to clock in at my dispatch job. During a 911 call, I blurted, "Would you like to try the McRib while it's back?" FML

#21023934
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46340) - you deserved it (8722)

On 01/10/2014 at 9:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I joined my friends out birthday clubbing. After I'd gotten a little drunk, a few guys asked for my number. I rattled off random numbers, until I accidentally said my mother's. Guess who woke up to a text at 2:17 in the morning, containing a picture of a penis. FML

#21022033
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26976) - you deserved it (35144)

On 01/08/2014 at 7:53pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I called my auto insurance company to try to get some discounts and lower my rate. I ended up adding $30 to my monthly payment. FML

#21021391
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37391) - you deserved it (13009)

On 01/08/2014 at 2:03pm - money - by Can2 (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my French wife chose the name of our unborn baby girl. She wants to call her Fanny and won't change her mind. FML

#21015236
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42631) - you deserved it (4810)

On 01/03/2014 at 6:03am - kids - by noway (man) - France (Pays de la Loire)

Today, a kid from my school called me, saying he's going on vacation to Japan soon and that since I was born there, I could teach him the language. His exact words at the start of the call were: "Hey man, you speak Asian, right?" I have to be around this shithead 5 days a week. FML

#20992530
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43275) - you deserved it (3557)

On 12/14/2013 at 5:39pm - misc - by bnc (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was playing monopoly with my boyfriend and a few friends. After I bankrupted my boyfriend, he turned to me and said, "I fucked your best friend last night, so who really won?" I turned to the best friend in question, she looked at the board and said, "I'd like to buy a house please." FML

#20967834
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59612) - you deserved it (4307)

On 11/23/2013 at 11:11am - misc - by I hate that game - United Kingdom (Wigan)

Today, I went to visit some family out of state for my niece's birthday. I couldn't think of what to get an 8-year-old so I got her a Barbie doll. Everyone else got her money, iPods, game consoles, etc. When she got to mine she asked "how do I turn it on?" Then threw it away when she couldn't. FML

#20568124
318 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46093) - you deserved it (4760)

On 03/31/2013 at 9:32am - kids - by The_Black_Jesus - United States

Today, my neighbours came to yell at me as they could hear my "shit music" through my window during the afternoon, so I turned it off. They then began to play their definition of "quality music" into the late hours of the night. I was listening to the Beatles. They blasted Nicki Minaj. FML

#20567871
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52331) - you deserved it (4840)

On 03/31/2013 at 2:24am - misc - by BornInTheWrongEra (woman) - United States

Today, I awoke to my husband talking to someone on the phone at 2am. I heard him say, "Baby you're making me hard." Immediately, I asked him who he was talking to. His response? "It's Jake, from State Farm." FML

#20562846
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (80043) - you deserved it (8257)

On 03/27/2013 at 7:55pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Hawaii)

Today, on Facebook, I mentioned that I'd just finished reading the novel Pet Sematary. Two hours later, I'd lost two friends and my boyfriend, after they commented "learn to spell, dumbass", "u illiterate fucker", and "well, I'm not dating you for your brains, am I?" I hate humanity. FML

#20555478
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32622) - you deserved it (7223)

On 03/22/2013 at 8:02pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: