Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

fuckyourlifeOP

Online | Search for a member

fuckyourlifeOP

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 27 May 1998 (16 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 559
  • Number of comments : 109
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About fuckyourlifeOP : If you wanna chat or something, feel free to send me a message.

fuckyourlifeOP's page activity

Visits<b>diesel_power</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 9:57am<b>melons</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 3:46am<b>winchestinalock</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 8:48am<b>Dreamsorrow93</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 3:51am<b>Toughsky</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 1:45am<b>jelly_bennett</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 4:00pm<b>Lanker</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 6:22pm<b>megwithcat</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 2:52pm<b>Mindset</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 4:13am<b>ajcopeland5</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 12:16am<b>PossibleMouse24</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 2:53am<b>ZorroRooster</b> - the 08/09/2014 at 10:14am<b>BicBoi996</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 6:03pm<b>34pijachufan</b> - the 08/06/2014 at 12:18am<b>abdiG</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 2:55pm<b>Ghastly</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 6:19pm<b>Wyaru</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 2:32pm<b>G0BLlN</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 3:47am

fuckyourlifeOP's FML badges

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

See all of fuckyourlifeOP's badges

fuckyourlifeOP's favorite FMLs

Today, I went over my girlfriend of 3 months' house for the first time. As we walked through the door, I was greeted by a little girl whose first words to me were, "Are you my daddy?" FML

#20766295
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52005) - you deserved it (4454)

On 07/06/2013 at 12:17am - love - by walker - United States

Today, I was telling my girlfriend about how my parents are flying out to Japan today on vacation. She was shocked at how short the flight will be, because "It's on the other side of the world." We live in the USA, and it seems I'm dating a Flat Earther. FML

#20765797
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36939) - you deserved it (6741)

On 07/05/2013 at 7:34pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I walked in on my 14-year-old son apparently practicing his oral sex skills on the crotch of one of his sister's Barbie dolls. FML

#20765717
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50976) - you deserved it (4861)

On 07/05/2013 at 6:45pm - kids - by The fuck, junior? (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my boyfriend and I went to my parents' barbecue. He knew my family is extremely religious, so what did he do? Called for silence to make an announcement, namely: "God isn't real." Cue a riot that ended in us being kicked out and me all but disowned for "putting him up to it". FML

#20765683
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42480) - you deserved it (7130)

On 07/05/2013 at 6:29pm - misc - by he's a dawk, and a cunt (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, at a family dinner, my mother-in-law talked me into showing off some moves that I've learned in martial arts. I gently did a restraining hold on her. She screamed that I was trying to break her wrists, and kept the wounded act up all night, smirking as everyone gave me death glares. FML

#20765643
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43121) - you deserved it (4689)

On 07/05/2013 at 5:59pm - misc - by -_- (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my step-dad tried to talk me into getting plastic surgery. His reasoning: "Let's face it, 28 and single? Look, I know your mum gave you shitty genes, but that's no excuse to avoid fixing your face, honey." FML

#20765605
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44188) - you deserved it (3048)

On 07/05/2013 at 5:37pm - misc - by buttuglyforeveralone :( (woman) - United Kingdom (Merthyr Tydfil)

Today, a girl I met recently asked if I wanted to go jogging with her, and I excitedly agreed. A while into our run, I ran out of breath and doubled over panting, all while she kept jogging and slowly disappeared down the street. What a way to spend time together. FML

#20765072
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39330) - you deserved it (8395)

On 07/05/2013 at 12:13pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Netherlands

Today, I Googled "How to act like an adult." I'm 37. FML

#20765003
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23556) - you deserved it (48630)

On 07/05/2013 at 11:16am - misc - by forever young (woman) - United States

Today, I got home from work early and discovered why my 17-year-old daughter's sprained elbow isn't getting any better after weeks of treatment. She can't stop giving handjobs. FML

#20764944
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66879) - you deserved it (7890)

On 07/05/2013 at 10:26am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I tried acid for the first time while camping with my best friend. A drunk driver smashed into my car, leaving it totaled. I had to explain the situation to a cop all while thinking my car was bleeding green ooze. FML

#20759193
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24176) - you deserved it (62672)

On 07/02/2013 at 1:24am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend told me to completely shave off all of my already-groomed pubic area because, "It looks so unnatural." Ignoring the obvious lack of logic, I asked him why he keeps his totally ungroomed. Turns out "Men having hair is okay. Women aren't supposed to, though." FML

#20759121
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49984) - you deserved it (12138)

On 07/02/2013 at 12:37am - intimacy - by yeshehaspornaddiction (woman) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, my boyfriend told me that he was going to buy me a "magic wand". Being a Harry Potter fanatic, I assumed he meant a replica wand. It turns out he actually meant a Magic Wand vibrator. I was more excited about the HP wand. FML

#20758994
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44628) - you deserved it (8825)

On 07/01/2013 at 11:37pm - intimacy - by whorecrux (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my washing machine broke down, within its warranty. I asked my neighbour if she could open the door for the mechanic while I was at work; she agreed. When I came home, I had a bill for 80 bucks for not opening the door. Her reason? She was busy watching her favorite TV show. FML

#20573502
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31991) - you deserved it (4587)

On 04/03/2013 at 5:40pm - money - by Jack -

Today, when my doctor told me I had symptoms of an STD, I had to repeatedly try to convince her I'm a 28-year-old virgin. Even as I left she still didn't believe me. FML

#20522701
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30965) - you deserved it (3343)

On 02/26/2013 at 3:21am - health - by Brook (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, in the spirit of Halloween and to get back at a child who repeatedly pressed the doorbell until I showed up, I quickly opened the door and yelled "Boo!" The child ended up being carried away crying with wet pants by a mother threatening to sue. FML

#20142562
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27052) - you deserved it (4519)

On 11/01/2012 at 4:20am - kids - by NoSpirit (woman) -



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #2: In slow-moving hell
  • It was once a dream, now it’s come true. We’re at the place that was allocated months ago for preprogrammed, enforced holiday fun time. We’ve put on some cargo shorts, slipped on some of those…

Wednesday 13 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: