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fthislyfe

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fthislyfe
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 6 August 1992 (20 years)
  • Number of visits : 6431
  • Number of comments : 446
  • Number of FMLs : 2 confirmed out of 34 posted

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fthislyfe's last visitors

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fthislyfe's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

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fthislyfe's favorite FMLs

Today, my baby son latched onto my nipple for a feed, after a month of having to be bottle fed because he wouldn't latch. This would be fantastic, if it weren't for the fact that I'm his father, not his mother. FML

#18191670
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32239) - you deserved it (2826)

On 11/08/2011 at 9:01am - kids - by possiblyoverweight (man) - United Kingdom (Bristol)

Today, I was yelled at by a customer because I couldn't tell her where the vitamins were in the pharmacy. The manager came and yelled at me for being lazy and incompetent. I work in the store across the street from the pharmacy. FML

#18190059
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24454) - you deserved it (1661)

On 11/08/2011 at 12:45am - work - by jodafish - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I discovered that if you are being mugged, never tell your mugger you are going to call the police because he will come back and steal your phone too. FML

#18183017
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13068) - you deserved it (26881)

On 11/07/2011 at 9:53am - money - by Luke - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had to deliver pizza to a nudist colony. I got an eyeful of more than I needed to see. FML

#18182863
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23552) - you deserved it (2606)

On 11/07/2011 at 9:24am - work - by Dlord357 (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I came home from school, only to find I was locked out. The cars were all there, but no one was in. It wasn't until I heard continuous banging from my parents' window that it clicked. They locked me out for over an hour in freezing weather just to have sex. FML

#18138083
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31178) - you deserved it (3065)

On 11/02/2011 at 12:37pm - intimacy - by miley098 - United Kingdom (London)

Today, on a dating site, I was matched with my brother, again. FML

#18128656
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39976) - you deserved it (3998)

On 11/01/2011 at 12:18pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Kansas)

Today, on a dating site, I was matched with my brother, again. FML

#18128656
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39976) - you deserved it (3998)

On 11/01/2011 at 12:18pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Kansas)

Today, I drove past a fragrant steakhouse and my mouth began to water and my stomach started rumbling, which would've been perfectly fine if it wasn't for the fact that I'm a vegan and an animal lover. My confused body craves burning flesh. FML

#18127858
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9849) - you deserved it (49722)

On 11/01/2011 at 9:22am - health - by loves the smell of burning flesh - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend admitted that the only reason he remembers my eye color is because it's the same shade of his shit after he's had a salad. FML

#18121591
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27939) - you deserved it (2907)

On 10/31/2011 at 4:06pm - love - by poopcoloredeyes (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, while on the phone with my boyfriend, I really needed to poop. Badly. He was in the middle of telling a story, so I figured I could get away with muting the phone while on the toilet. Halfway through, he suddenly went silent. I forgot to mute the phone. FML

#18060415
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9336) - you deserved it (29011)

On 10/24/2011 at 1:04am - love - by ShitHappens - United States

Today, while at my job as a hostess, I was seating a couple and their adorable little girl. I tried to ask how old she was, but what came out was, "Aww, what breed is she?" FML

#18039986
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13576) - you deserved it (21487)

On 10/21/2011 at 5:27pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my roomie had guests over. I didn't feel like socializing, but I really had to piss. So I pissed in the plant in my room, spilled half of it, mopped it up with an old shirt, and went to bed. FML

#18036176
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5299) - you deserved it (35312)

On 10/21/2011 at 12:57am - misc - by crankg - United States (Ohio)

Today, I thought I'd be helpful and pick up my Dad's car from the repairs shop for him while he was at work. So, on my own, I hopped in my car and I drove the 15 minutes out to the shop. Only upon arriving did I consider the situation I'd put myself in. FML

Today, while sitting on the toilet, my phone pocket dialed my boss's cell. He was in the next stall. He answered. FML

#18010067
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23941) - you deserved it (2640)

On 10/17/2011 at 9:14pm - work - by number2 - United States

Today, while reading over my sent application email to a job I have been trying to get, I found out my brother had put "Heil Hitler!" as my signature. FML

#17996037
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29950) - you deserved it (3669)

On 10/16/2011 at 3:15am - work - by Unemployed - United States (Oregon)



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