fthislyfe

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fthislyfe

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 6 August 1992 (24 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 10577
  • Number of comments : 446
  • Number of FMLs : 2 confirmed out of 34 posted

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fthislyfe's page activity

Visits<b>laurenada</b> - the 08/11/2016 at 2:35pm<b>Tripartita</b> - the 08/08/2016 at 11:21am<b>joco4</b> - the 08/07/2016 at 2:08am<b>LAS11</b> - the 07/22/2016 at 3:42pm<b>Spencyy</b> - the 06/10/2016 at 11:49am<b>DrowningLessons</b> - the 06/09/2016 at 6:27pm<b>PresAgent</b> - the 05/28/2016 at 2:59am<b>turdwrangler</b> - the 04/07/2016 at 10:24am<b>dmcintosh</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 1:46pm<b>DonkeyKongDaddy</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 12:50am<b>sweetbliss3</b> - the 01/24/2016 at 10:52pm<b>Cookie_Overlord</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 3:35am<b>SychoticFML</b> - the 01/12/2016 at 1:54am<b>Tomato_Cheese</b> - the 01/06/2016 at 6:11am<b>swimthenread27</b> - the 12/31/2015 at 11:16pm<b>Celeden</b> - the 12/17/2015 at 1:46pm<b>MrConfusion</b> - the 11/15/2015 at 7:54pm<b>punmessiah</b> - the 10/27/2015 at 2:56pm

Fucked!<b>paravoz</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 9:04am<b>Mr_Saikaly</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 1:10pm<b>Nathan23xx</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 5:57am

fthislyfe's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

See all of fthislyfe's badges

fthislyfe's favorite FMLs

Today, my baby son latched onto my nipple for a feed, after a month of having to be bottle fed because he wouldn't latch. This would be fantastic, if it weren't for the fact that I'm his father, not his mother. FML

by possiblyoverweight / 11/08/2011 at 9:01am / United Kingdom (Bristol) / Kids

Today, I was yelled at by a customer because I couldn't tell her where the vitamins were in the pharmacy. The manager came and yelled at me for being lazy and incompetent. I work in the store across the street from the pharmacy. FML

by jodafish / 11/08/2011 at 12:45am / Canada (Quebec) / Work

Today, I discovered that if you are being mugged, never tell your mugger you are going to call the police because he will come back and steal your phone too. FML

by Luke / 11/07/2011 at 9:53am / United States (Virginia) / Money

Today, I had to deliver pizza to a nudist colony. I got an eyeful of more than I needed to see. FML

by Dlord357 / 11/07/2011 at 9:24am / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, I came home from school, only to find I was locked out. The cars were all there, but no one was in. It wasn't until I heard continuous banging from my parents' window that it clicked. They locked me out for over an hour in freezing weather just to have sex. FML

by miley098 / 11/02/2011 at 12:37pm / United Kingdom (London) / Intimacy

Today, on a dating site, I was matched with my brother, again. FML

by Anonymous / 11/01/2011 at 12:18pm / United States (Kansas) / Miscellaneous

Today, on a dating site, I was matched with my brother, again. FML

by Anonymous / 11/01/2011 at 12:18pm / United States (Kansas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I drove past a fragrant steakhouse and my mouth began to water and my stomach started rumbling, which would've been perfectly fine if it wasn't for the fact that I'm a vegan and an animal lover. My confused body craves burning flesh. FML

by loves the smell of burning flesh / 11/01/2011 at 9:22am / United States (California) / Health

Today, my boyfriend admitted that the only reason he remembers my eye color is because it's the same shade of his shit after he's had a salad. FML

by poopcoloredeyes / 10/31/2011 at 4:06pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, while on the phone with my boyfriend, I really needed to poop. Badly. He was in the middle of telling a story, so I figured I could get away with muting the phone while on the toilet. Halfway through, he suddenly went silent. I forgot to mute the phone. FML

by ShitHappens / 10/24/2011 at 1:04am / United States / Love

Today, while at my job as a hostess, I was seating a couple and their adorable little girl. I tried to ask how old she was, but what came out was, "Aww, what breed is she?" FML

by Anonymous / 10/21/2011 at 5:27pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Work

Today, my roomie had guests over. I didn't feel like socializing, but I really had to piss. So I pissed in the plant in my room, spilled half of it, mopped it up with an old shirt, and went to bed. FML

by crankg / 10/21/2011 at 12:57am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I thought I'd be helpful and pick up my Dad's car from the repairs shop for him while he was at work. So, on my own, I hopped in my car and I drove the 15 minutes out to the shop. Only upon arriving did I consider the situation I'd put myself in. FML

by BackAndForth / 10/18/2011 at 12:27am / United States (Illinois) / Transportation

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, while sitting on the toilet, my phone pocket dialed my boss's cell. He was in the next stall. He answered. FML

by number2 / 10/17/2011 at 9:14pm / United States / Work

Today, while reading over my sent application email to a job I have been trying to get, I found out my brother had put "Heil Hitler!" as my signature. FML

by Unemployed / 10/16/2011 at 3:15am / United States (Oregon) / Work