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Today, at martial arts practice, a guest sensei wanted to teach me some "manners". He pinned me down and proceded to choke me while crushing my nuts with his hands and yelling at me in front of the whole class, "DOES THAT HURT?!!?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (31846) - you totally deserved it (5076)
On 07/15/2009 at 9:21am - misc - by GrippedMyBalls - Korea Republic of (Seoul-t'ukpyolsi)
Today, we sparred for Tae Kwon Do. I forgot my cup, but I didn't think anyone sucked enough to hit me below the belt. 5 seconds into a match, some girl knees me in the happy sacks. After writhing in pain for 30 seconds, I got back up to spar. I didn't think she sucked enough to do it again. She did. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45785) - you totally deserved it (19209)
On 04/02/2009 at 6:28am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "Because you can't find a real girl, I made your current one prettier, Love Mom." FML
I agree, your life sucks (107334) - you totally deserved it (27597)
On 04/02/2009 at 1:13am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)
Today, whilst my parents and I were out, my older brother thought it would be funny to play porn on my computer. At full volume. With my window wide open. Now my next-door neighbors tell their kids I'm a spawn of Satan, and the weird guy from across the street winks at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40313) - you totally deserved it (4754)
On 03/27/2009 at 11:18am - misc - by Spawn_of_Satan (woman) - Hong Kong
Today, I texted my boyfriend to see if he wanted to finally have sex today. His response was "Can't, Platinum just came out." I didn't know what that meant so I searched "Platinum 3-22-2009" on Google. I found out he's talking about a new Pokemon game. FML
I agree, your life sucks (83916) - you totally deserved it (11710)
On 03/22/2009 at 10:15pm - intimacy - by thisreallysucks2 (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my boyfriend and I decided to have sex. I was a virgin and he wasn't. About 30 seconds in he collapsed on me. I thought he was joking around and I started laughing. He wasn't joking. He was done. FML
I agree, your life sucks (90972) - you totally deserved it (7966)
On 03/20/2009 at 2:11am - intimacy - by firsttimer69 (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
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