Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

friedpwnadge

Offline (6 hours ago) | Search for a member

friedpwnadge

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 6881
  • Number of comments : 294
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 18 posted

About friedpwnadge : Now offering upgrades from basic bitch to premium bitch for three small payments of $19.95. And no I don't wear Gucci hoe.

friedpwnadge's page activity

Visits<b>Jiratias</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 6:23am<b>OrangeJews</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 11:24pm<b>stinkyslinky</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 10:50am<b>ashleyrose465</b> - the 06/30/2015 at 1:46am<b>_jack117_</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 4:47pm<b>ArturoJames</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 1:24am<b>_heavenlysasa</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 2:12pm<b>ExtremeEncounter</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 1:30pm<b>ScarredFlame</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 8:39am<b>InternetHobo</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 6:48am<b>CannotBeSeen</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 1:40pm<b>josh8215</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 1:03am<b>oops6663</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 11:03am<b>int15</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 10:13am<b>soulcrusher11</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 10:04pm<b>fighterdown</b> - the 05/07/2015 at 5:24pm<b>ImaginaryPerson</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 12:07am<b>UncleCactus</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 4:00pm

Fucked!<b>SuperSexyKing124</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 2:30am<b>Zigstyle308</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 2:38am<b>commanderstiff</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 6:56pm<b>ana_lee_bonde</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 5:39pm<b>Steve95401</b> - the 03/11/2015 at 8:20pm

friedpwnadge's FML badges

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of friedpwnadge's badges

friedpwnadge's favorite FMLs

Today, I met my birth mother. My dad won't talk to me, my mom won't stop crying and thinks I'm replacing her, and the rest of my family won't stop calling me a bitch. I'm 21, and I just wanted to meet the woman who pushed me head-first out of her vagina. FML

Today, I called work crying, telling them that I wouldn't be able to go to work tomorrow due to my grandmother's sudden and tragic death. After hanging up, I walked into the midnight release of Grand Theft Auto 5. I had no idea my boss was also an avid gamer. FML

#20884742
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18109) - you deserved it (89459)

On 09/17/2013 at 12:36am - work - by fired (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, the guy on the floor above me decided it was time for a tuba jam session. Apparently optimal tuba time is 2am. FML

#20881873
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40150) - you deserved it (2688)

On 09/15/2013 at 2:02am - misc - by sleeplessinrichmond - United States (New York)

Today, my psycho girlfriend tried to blackmail me into giving her money, threatening to show everyone the nude pictures I recently sent her. Except the pictures on her phone that she threatened me with weren't even of me. Nice to know I'm also being cheated on. FML

#20881137
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54577) - you deserved it (4587)

On 09/14/2013 at 4:09pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I hooked up with the guy I've liked for a while, even though my friends joked that his large pickup truck meant that he was "compensating" for having a small penis. They were right. Very right. FML

#20876171
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55591) - you deserved it (12222)

On 09/10/2013 at 8:14pm - intimacy - by CityBoysNow - United States (Missouri)

Today, I found out I do not have a fast metabolism, I've actually had a tape worm living inside me for 3 years. FML

#20875969
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58403) - you deserved it (3405)

On 09/10/2013 at 5:41pm - health - by Iskylite (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, the mother of one of my students bitched me out about her son's poor grades. He lazes around all day, paying no attention and being a constant nuisance. But, she says it's not his fault, and demands that I give him better grades so he won't get "self-esteem" issues. FML

#20870380
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48843) - you deserved it (3204)

On 09/06/2013 at 4:36pm - work - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, I got home from work and found my dog missing. When I asked my neighbor if she saw what happened, I saw my dog sleeping on her couch. She tried to say it was hers. FML

#20868590
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50946) - you deserved it (2786)

On 09/05/2013 at 7:02am - animals - by GotMyBitchBack - United States (Ohio)

Today, I collected my new timetable at college only to find I've been dropped from all my classes. I've been listed as deceased. I'm definitely not dead and have no idea how I supposedly died. FML

#20867417
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50760) - you deserved it (2640)

On 09/04/2013 at 11:59am - work - by resurrected - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today, I read a seemingly serious article online about giving your smartphone some extra charge by putting it in the microwave for one minute. My phone is now fried. FML

#20864782
526 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18817) - you deserved it (134853)

On 09/02/2013 at 4:37pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I was yelled at once again for being in the school gym without a coach present. I am the coach. FML

Today, I found out after spending my life's income on paying for my grandma's cancer treatment that she has been faking it. FML

#20859354
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56424) - you deserved it (3308)

On 08/29/2013 at 2:48pm - health - by scammed (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I finally received the bicycle I ordered months ago. It was an expensive custom-made bike which perfectly fit my 6'9" frame. Today, that bike got stolen. FML

#20859064
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46822) - you deserved it (4088)

On 08/29/2013 at 9:40am - misc - by tallguy (man) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, my neighbor's daughter started learning how to play the trombone. FML

#20857611
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41769) - you deserved it (4922)

On 08/28/2013 at 6:33am - kids - by Alice (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I asked my boss for a raise, explaining that another shop offered me a job at a higher rate, but I would stay if he would offer me the same. Instead, he fired me then called the other shop and said I was fired for failing a drug test. FML

#20857270
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55603) - you deserved it (7218)

On 08/27/2013 at 11:21pm - work - by nowork - United States (New York)



FML's blog

  • FML with pics? That's FML Pics
  • They say that a picture is worth a thousand words. We reckoned pictures could be worth 300 characters, which is why we launched FML Pics. The name says it all, really: it's an FML app, only with…

Monday 3 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: