Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

friedpwnadge

Offline (8 hours ago) | Search for a member

friedpwnadge

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 6626
  • Number of comments : 291
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 18 posted

About friedpwnadge : Now offering upgrades from basic bitch to premium bitch for three small payments of $19.95. And no I don't wear Gucci hoe.

friedpwnadge's page activity

Visits<b>ashleyrose465</b> - the 06/30/2015 at 1:46am<b>_jack117_</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 4:47pm<b>ArturoJames</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 1:24am<b>_heavenlysasa</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 2:12pm<b>ExtremeEncounter</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 1:30pm<b>ScarredFlame</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 8:39am<b>InternetHobo</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 6:48am<b>CannotBeSeen</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 1:40pm<b>josh8215</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 1:03am<b>oops6663</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 11:03am<b>int15</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 10:13am<b>soulcrusher11</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 10:04pm<b>fighterdown</b> - the 05/07/2015 at 5:24pm<b>ImaginaryPerson</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 12:07am<b>UncleCactus</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 4:00pm<b>AMcM</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 10:16am<b>BaglMinionz</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 1:25pm<b>fenem</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 1:18pm

Fucked!<b>SuperSexyKing124</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 2:30am<b>Zigstyle308</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 2:38am<b>commanderstiff</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 6:56pm<b>ana_lee_bonde</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 5:39pm<b>Steve95401</b> - the 03/11/2015 at 8:20pm

friedpwnadge's FML badges

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of friedpwnadge's badges

friedpwnadge's favorite FMLs

Today, while leaving McDonald's, I threw a fry out the window to a flock of seagulls. I watched in the rear-view mirror as it landed in the opposite lane and about 60 winged rats descended upon the street, causing a truck to veer off the road and crash. FML

#20773275
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27504) - you deserved it (46095)

On 07/09/2013 at 10:48pm - misc - by John - United States

Today, my husband received the "antique" samurai sword that he bought on Craigslist with $399.99 of our money. He only shared my outrage at the waste of money when he opened the package, only to find a toy sword along with a note saying, "HAHA, TROLLED." FML

#20767253
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55225) - you deserved it (9774)

On 07/06/2013 at 3:45pm - money - by juliearis (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I realized that I am such a Grammar Nazi that when a porn star says something grammatically-incorrect, I lose my boner. FML

#20766909
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48892) - you deserved it (19602)

On 07/06/2013 at 11:42am - misc - by BlueB (man) - United States

Today, while out for lunch, a guy approached me and asked for my number. I politely declined. To my dismay, he dropped to his knees, grabbed his head, and started moaning about how nobody ever gives him a chance. I felt the accusing stares. FML

#20766730
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48756) - you deserved it (6444)

On 07/06/2013 at 7:26am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I got home from work early and discovered why my 17-year-old daughter's sprained elbow isn't getting any better after weeks of treatment. She can't stop giving handjobs. FML

#20764944
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69058) - you deserved it (8116)

On 07/05/2013 at 10:26am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had the questionable honor of explaining the difference between "your" and "you're" to my boss, and very diplomatically make her see why her poor grasp of language could affect our credibility as a communication agency. I'm Swedish, and English is my third language. She's American. FML

#20761131
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54031) - you deserved it (3490)

On 07/03/2013 at 2:48am - work - by grammarnazi-forareason (man) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I tried acid for the first time while camping with my best friend. A drunk driver smashed into my car, leaving it totaled. I had to explain the situation to a cop all while thinking my car was bleeding green ooze. FML

#20759193
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25481) - you deserved it (65240)

On 07/02/2013 at 1:24am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my mom signed me up for a swimming class to show my sister there's nothing to be afraid of. Considering I'm 17, I assumed I'd be in an advanced class. Instead, I get to spend summer blowing bubbles in the shallow end with four-year-olds as my little sister cheers me on from the steps. FML

#20758869
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38925) - you deserved it (3290)

On 07/01/2013 at 10:37pm - misc - by AwkwardPotato - United States (California)

Today, I had to explain to a coworker that "the little red X" next to the email title she's been pushing out of curiosity is actually the delete button. Then, I had to restore the dozen emails she'd deleted even after I told her to stop. She's a manager. I stock shelves for a living. FML

#20758316
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41612) - you deserved it (2342)

On 07/01/2013 at 5:14pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my crush kissed me for the first time. However, my hair was falling into my face and getting in the way. No problem, I wear a wig so without thinking, I simply removed it. I don't think he'll kiss me again anytime soon. FML

#20755685
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49194) - you deserved it (18930)

On 06/30/2013 at 6:58am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I ran out of clean boxers. Thinking nobody would find out, I snatched a pair of my wife's panties. Later, we had a cook out for my birthday, where some of my old pals thought it would be funny to pants me. FML

#20721670
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37697) - you deserved it (68481)

On 06/12/2013 at 2:39pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, I walked in on my dad masturbating to a nude photo of my mum on the computer. She passed away four years ago. FML

#20713899
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69018) - you deserved it (12999)

On 06/08/2013 at 4:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Bromley)

Today, after years of training and competing, I realized that the universe does not want me to play the piano. Not only do I have hands that can fit in toddler-sized gloves, my carpal tunnel is already to the point where I have to wear a brace at night, at the ripe old age of 14. FML

Today, I got dragged along to a family dinner. Some idiot invited my douchebag vegan uncle, who spent half the night making condescending remarks and lecturing us on how disgusting it was to have steak on offer at the table. A fistfight eventually erupted, and the cops were called. FML

#20687302
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40400) - you deserved it (3670)

On 05/26/2013 at 12:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States



FML's blog

  • Angie's illustrated FML
  • Here we go again. This week I'm talking to you live from the Paris Japan Expo. I'm dressed up as Bernard from the Sailor Moon series, and I almost got kicked out because my katana wasn't the…

Friday 3 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: