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I agree, their lives suck
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fredman0000's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 01/06/2012 at 9:22pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Health
Today, I was on the train listening to my iPod on shuffle. The "Oompa Loompa" song came on, and slightly amused, I started humming it. It wasn't until I noticed that the man next to me was a midget that I understood the horrified looks I was getting. FML
by lorahayes / 01/05/2012 at 1:39pm / United Kingdom (Hertford) / Miscellaneous
Today, after rocking my one-year old daughter for nearly two hours, she finally fell asleep. As I went to leave her room, I stubbed my toe. I now have a broken toe, a screaming child, and a wife who will be so proud that her daughter's first word is "FUCK!" FML
by DocBastard / 12/16/2011 at 9:29pm / United States / Kids
by Anonymous / 11/21/2011 at 5:39pm / United States (Maine) / Intimacy
by lababy / 11/15/2011 at 12:20pm / United States / Intimacy
Today, I had a panic attack. Not on a crowded train, or an airplane, or in school, or any of the expected places. It was in my yoga class, which my therapist recommended for me, while I was in a dead-body position. FML
by panickygrl / 11/06/2011 at 12:43pm / United States (Virginia) / Health
by rj93 / 11/05/2011 at 9:43am / United Kingdom (Ballymena) / Health
by sakura_girl / 11/04/2011 at 7:59am / United Kingdom (Birmingham) / Health
Today, I drove past a fragrant steakhouse and my mouth began to water and my stomach started rumbling, which would've been perfectly fine if it wasn't for the fact that I'm a vegan and an animal lover. My confused body craves burning flesh. FML
by loves the smell of burning flesh / 11/01/2011 at 9:22am / United States (California) / Health
Today, I woke up in the middle of the night feeling sick. I went to the bathroom and knelt in front of the toilet, waiting to throw up. When I finally did, I violently shit my pants at the same time. I was at my friend's house. FML
by sadddddd / 09/10/2011 at 9:54pm / Canada (New Brunswick) / Health
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- 1Today, I took a test. I got up to turn it in, and accidentally bumped into another student. We both… 2Today, I tried to fire the worst worker I've ever had over the phone because he never shows up for… 3Today, a week after dropping my car off for the third time in a month at the dealership because of…