Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

forlifebro

Offline (the 12/19/2014 at 5:30pm) | Search for a member

forlifebro

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 5 July 1998 (16 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2533
  • Number of comments : 23
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About forlifebro : 12" Tall 16lb's light brown. Living the pug life baby

forlifebro's page activity

Visits<b>LondonderryAir</b> - the 11/16/2014 at 7:59pm<b>idkwat2useasname</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 10:41am<b>RockUntilYouDie</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 7:48pm<b>cherrio27</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 10:25pm<b>krupa1017</b> - the 06/01/2014 at 3:34pm<b>GreenBeast</b> - the 03/12/2014 at 2:02pm<b>klm2purple</b> - the 03/12/2014 at 1:06am<b>Zoeythedinosaur</b> - the 01/03/2014 at 12:11am<b>Istah</b> - the 01/01/2014 at 3:21am<b>equitationbound</b> - the 12/31/2013 at 4:20am<b>MichellinMan</b> - the 12/16/2013 at 11:54am<b>mesutozil11</b> - the 12/15/2013 at 10:17pm<b>Mackay92</b> - the 12/15/2013 at 5:33pm<b>specialist8404</b> - the 12/09/2013 at 9:22pm<b>Zephyrrr</b> - the 11/18/2013 at 1:10am<b>BunchieRules</b> - the 11/15/2013 at 12:47am<b>Redthetrainer</b> - the 10/31/2013 at 8:21pm<b>adrianramz69</b> - the 10/30/2013 at 11:33pm

Liked!<b>idkwat2useasname</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 4:41pm

forlifebro's FML badges

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of forlifebro's badges

forlifebro's favorite FMLs

Today, on a dimly lit red eye flight, I woke up to see my mom's head bobbing up and down in my dad's lap. I guess giving out stealthy blow jobs next to your sleeping son is no big deal. FML

#21311441
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40936) - you deserved it (2733)

On 12/04/2014 at 2:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, after a few weeks of my dad setting up glue traps in the garage to trap mice, I found out what it's like to have a pigeon wander in and get its foot stuck on one. FML

Today, I realized that although I'm dating the most loveable, caring and genuine man, the fact that he's a crack addict means I'll never be his drug of choice when he needs a hit. FML

#21310760
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26440) - you deserved it (18427)

On 12/03/2014 at 1:34pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I bought my cat a fun toy at the one of a kind craft show. It has catnip in it, which he loves. He flipped out, so I took it away. He won't stop trying to break into the cupboard I put it in. My cat has a drug problem. FML

#21310320
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27305) - you deserved it (4680)

On 12/02/2014 at 7:56pm - animals - by allykat - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after putting in so much effort to forgive my husband for his affair, we had sex. Not even 2 minutes into it, he called me by the other woman's name. FML

#21309730
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42759) - you deserved it (8564)

On 12/01/2014 at 10:14pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Alaska)

Today, my mom found my dildo, and got so angry that she beat me with it. FML

#21309415
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42579) - you deserved it (10831)

On 12/01/2014 at 12:55pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I realized my anger management has hit a new low when I screamed at a goose for being a goose. FML

#21309384
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27630) - you deserved it (7477)

On 12/01/2014 at 11:38am - misc - by WickedLittleDoll - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my wife was giving me a blowjob when I foolishly asked her how she got so good at giving them. She looked straight into my eyes and replied, "Practising on about six guys before you." FML

#21308641
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30147) - you deserved it (17592)

On 11/30/2014 at 8:07am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my wife and I drove two hours from our rural town to buy a new sofa. When we got home, it took us an hour to figure out there was no way to fit it through our door. We made the two hour drive back to return it, only to find the store was closed. FML

#21308507
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28432) - you deserved it (8853)

On 11/30/2014 at 1:09am - misc - by davy0540 - United States

Today, my little sister asked if she could play on my laptop, but I said no because I was writing an essay for school. She then bit herself hard and showed the mark to our parents, saying I did it. As they bitched me out, my sister got on my laptop and deleted my half-finished essay. FML

#21308491
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40310) - you deserved it (2556)

On 11/30/2014 at 12:48am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend went to work instead of going to my father's funeral. He works at home and chooses his own hours. FML

#21308437
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34092) - you deserved it (3037)

On 11/29/2014 at 11:29pm - misc - by .... - United States (Illinois)

Today, my mom told me that her vagina is "as cute today as it was twenty years ago." FML

#21308358
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28976) - you deserved it (2645)

On 11/29/2014 at 9:06pm - misc - by justawallflower - United States (Ohio)

Today, I asked my girlfriend's father for permission to take his daughter's hand in marriage. He asked me "Which one?" I said "Uh, the one I'm dating... Lisa." He belched and said, "Yeah sure, throw 'er off a cliff for all I care. Piss off, boy." So much for chivalry. FML

#21308242
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33065) - you deserved it (2986)

On 11/29/2014 at 4:54pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, after a huge fight, my girlfriend started coming onto me. I thought it was actual make-up sex and went along with it. It was great, until she suddenly shoved me off her just as I was almost ready to come. She smugly announced she was dumping me, got dressed, then left. FML

#21308219
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34886) - you deserved it (5751)

On 11/29/2014 at 4:08pm - intimacy - by blueballed (man) - Germany (Schleswig-Holstein)

Today, I sent my boyfriend a dirty picture to turn him on. He texted back: "Jfc, why wud u tease me like that?? Srsly fuck off". FML

#21308108
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27951) - you deserved it (5789)

On 11/29/2014 at 12:03pm - intimacy - by come on man (woman) - United States (California)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: