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fooltemptress

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fooltemptress

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4528
  • Number of comments : 110
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 30 posted

About fooltemptress : Jack of all trades; master of none, with a penchant for writing and all things snark. I also do costume design, acting, and some occasional directing. I love animals and foster dogs when I can. I have Chronic Inflammatory Demyelinating Polyneuropathy, a disease similar to Multiple Sclerosis, and Fibromyalgia. I'm generally friendly so feel free to message me if you ever want to chat :)

fooltemptress's page activity

Visits<b>Journiexo</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 3:12pm<b>wecca875</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 12:54pm<b>justkeez</b> - the 06/04/2014 at 1:31pm<b>VHNox</b> - the 05/13/2014 at 10:40pm<b>xNotCreative</b> - the 05/05/2014 at 5:27am<b>toomanyidiots</b> - the 05/05/2014 at 4:39am<b>theoneknownasjp</b> - the 05/05/2014 at 4:21am<b>HumbleExistence</b> - the 05/05/2014 at 4:16am<b>nick_brock5</b> - the 04/21/2014 at 6:58pm<b>Earrings100</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 10:33am<b>6dandaman5</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 6:33pm<b>Crash7777</b> - the 04/09/2014 at 12:21am<b>whosittoyou</b> - the 04/08/2014 at 6:18am<b>woainishamu</b> - the 04/08/2014 at 2:38am<b>pumboc</b> - the 04/03/2014 at 6:36am<b>Ricko_Ram</b> - the 03/31/2014 at 11:29pm<b>PacosTacos21</b> - the 03/31/2014 at 2:29am<b>vb68</b> - the 03/30/2014 at 11:32pm

fooltemptress's FML badges

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

You sure know how to party?

You posted a comment on the 31st of December between 11pm and 1am. Happy New Year!

See all of fooltemptress's badges

fooltemptress's favorite FMLs

Today, I got high for the first time. Apparently I called my vet and told him my goldfish was barking. I found out when he called me back later to make sure we were both okay. FML

#21258033
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22464) - you deserved it (13029)

On 09/14/2014 at 12:38pm - animals - by Anonymous - Ghana (Greater Accra)

Today, I discovered that one of our cats is super creepy. He humps the blankets on my mother's bed while staring at her while she's sleeping. FML

#21257305
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30880) - you deserved it (2603)

On 09/13/2014 at 2:56am - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was watching a movie with my boyfriend. We were getting into the mood so I tried to eat the popcorn kind of sexually, causing me to choke on the popcorn and throw up. FML

#21257293
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27516) - you deserved it (13138)

On 09/13/2014 at 2:29am - misc - by Nat - United States (Texas)

Today, my daughter was going to Bulk Barn so I asked her to pick me up something to snack on. When she got home, she brought over a bag and without listening to her explain what it was, I began eating it. She looked at me confused, then began laughing. It was a dog treat. FML

#21256734
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17921) - you deserved it (22844)

On 09/12/2014 at 1:50am - misc - by oops... - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I watched with mild confusion as a piece of paper tucked underneath my windshield wiper flapped around on the highway. What could it be? Surely not a parking ticket. Powerless, I watched it fly away. It must have been the insurance information for the person who swiped the back of my car. FML

Today, my girlfriend went shopping at Victoria's Secret with me. While she was in the fitting room, her parents walked by and saw me. They don't approve of the store, so I panicked and told them I was considering becoming a woman. FML

#21255419
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38399) - you deserved it (10568)

On 09/09/2014 at 11:16pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I fell asleep with my luggage at a bus terminal. Upon waking up, I found that someone had opened my bags and stolen all my socks. FML

#21255144
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34012) - you deserved it (6562)

On 09/09/2014 at 4:23pm - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, I found out I sent several embarrassing videos while under the influence of the meds I was given while getting my wisdom teeth out. When I asked my mom why she didn't take my phone, she said she tried but I started whining and growling at her. FML

Today, I'm staying with my grandma and her older sister while my parents are away. It's been two hours and so far they've popped vicodins, talked about banging Alex Trebek, and had a farting contest. FML

#21253639
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33632) - you deserved it (3623)

On 09/07/2014 at 11:11am - misc - by imgonnadie (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I looked at a girl's profile on a dating website, and it told her I'd visited it. Later on, she sent me a message. It said: "Don't even think about it." FML

#21253110
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32436) - you deserved it (3114)

On 09/06/2014 at 3:29pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I tried to pull the old "bucket of water above the door" prank on my brother, but the bucket didn't fall when he opened the door. He noticed it, took it down, then pinned me to the floor and waterboarded me with the ice-cold water. FML

#21252533
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15324) - you deserved it (34888)

On 09/05/2014 at 5:37pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Vasterbottens Lan)

Today, my cat decided to use my bowl of rice krispies as his litter box. FML

Today, I was walking my dogs when a woman at a bus stop quite rudely exclaimed, "Keep those mutts away from my kid". I replied just as rudely that I wouldn't want them anywhere near her dirty sprog. It was then we both realised she was a customer that I regularly talk to at work. FML

Today, my husband asked our tax professional if we could file my profession as "Expert Dream Murderer." I'm a guidance counselor. FML

#21251173
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33715) - you deserved it (4497)

On 09/03/2014 at 2:24pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, after finally getting rid of an extremely rude, abusive customer, I muttered that I could kill people like her. I didn't know my manager had heard me, until a pair of police officers arrived. He'd reported me for "threatening to murder a customer". FML

#21247836
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35956) - you deserved it (9382)

On 08/29/2014 at 12:17pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Slough)



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  • So, is everyone back from their vacation? Can we get back to regular programming? No? OK, I get it. You're all still crying about not being at the beach any more, well, I am anyway. And this time of year…

Thursday 11 September 2014

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