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fml0505

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fml0505
  • Town/Country : Montana, United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 31 May 1991 (22 years)
  • Number of visits : 791
  • Number of comments : 60
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About fml0505 : I'm just your average guy. For starters, I'm a member of the Westboro Baptist Church. I kill the time traveling to protests by listening to Justin Bieber and Miley Cyrus. They are my favorite.

Besides my religious affiliations and musical tastes, I am a cat lover. I have 12 of them and I am looking for lucky number 13! When I'm not tending to the overflowing litter boxes strewn across my house, I make custom cat sweaters.

My favorite TV shows are Honey Boo Boo, Jersey Shore, The Bachelorette, Toddlers for Tiaras, and all the different versions of Real Housewives. I only watch reality TV, more specifically; the kind that shows humanity at our finest and inspires me to become a better person.

One more thing; I use hashtags and lol in everyday conversation, all while tweeting my every thought and uploading hundreds of pictures of myself on Instagram.

#ThatsIt #ImOnTheLeft

fml0505's last visitors

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fml0505's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

I never take things to heart

Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.

See all of fml0505's badges

fml0505's favorite FMLs

Today, I had a show with my drama group. My mom isn't a good drunk, she decided to scream along to every song and pass out halfway through. She was in the front row. FML

#14484752
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20342) - you deserved it (1719)

On 01/06/2011 at 11:46am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Aberdeen City)

Today, my son told his teacher that she "has a nice rack." He's four. FML

#14079841
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24358) - you deserved it (9644)

On 12/04/2010 at 1:50am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Singapore

Today, I was getting my portrait done. The artist told me to smile. He looked at me, then said, "Oh, don't smile." FML

#10066233
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25533) - you deserved it (3662)

On 04/22/2010 at 1:37pm - health - by :) - Greece (Attiki)

Today, I was bored at work looking at a sex offender list of my area. After a couple pages, I saw my uncle. FML

#8638968
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36847) - you deserved it (2149)

On 02/25/2010 at 12:44pm - intimacy - by grossuncle (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I woke up to hear my boyfriend drunkenly crashing around in the living room, after peeing in an ashtray because he thought it was a urinal. FML

#8409963
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16189) - you deserved it (3254)

On 02/18/2010 at 3:08pm - love - by gp28 - United States

Today, I woke up with my face sharpied. I live alone. FML

#7501218
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34106) - you deserved it (2645)

On 01/22/2010 at 3:51pm - misc - by Funnymann - United States

Today, I got diagnosed with a condition that expresses itself in the form of violent diarrhea whenever I get nervous. Now I am constantly nervous about getting nervous about anything. FML

#5876533
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40072) - you deserved it (2305)

On 10/18/2009 at 9:36am - health - by Anonymous (man) - Sweden (Norrbottens Lan)

Today, I was listening to music while my grandma and mom were in the same room. I only had one headphone in. My mom, thinking I had both in, started telling my grandma how much of a "little bitch" I am. My grandma went on to say, "She's also a slut." FML

#4370126
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51475) - you deserved it (15693)

On 08/07/2009 at 8:43pm - misc - by Momlovesme (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I found out that my brother was selling pictures of me showering. For what? World of Warcraft money. FML

#4073449
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59266) - you deserved it (3319)

On 07/27/2009 at 3:32am - misc - by Anon (woman) - Singapore

Today, I went to a funeral. When I got there, I hugged one of the family members and he asked, "How are you?" Out of habit, I replied, "Good, how about you?" He looked appalled and shouted "How the fuck do you think I am?! My mother just died!" loud enough for everyone to hear. FML

#3968055
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36891) - you deserved it (17238)

On 07/23/2009 at 12:40am - misc - by partycats (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I woke up feeling a tingling sensation on my testicles. I enjoyed it for a few seconds, then threw off the covers. Looks like there have been cockroaches in my bed. FML

#3852842
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47023) - you deserved it (8626)

On 07/18/2009 at 6:48am - misc - by fartypeepee (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I sent out my monthly curriculum list to the parents of the kids in my math class so they can see what their children will be learning. I usually end my e-mails with the phrase 'math is power'. Now, 154 parents got an e-mail saying 'meth is power'. FML

#3505255
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36003) - you deserved it (19623)

On 07/05/2009 at 2:16pm - misc - by shit... (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my dog started to hump my leg. He always does this and I heard that humping the dog back asserted dominance. Well, I decided to, and I dry humped him back. As I was doing this I said "How do you like that!" And then my mom walked in. FML

#2026481
435 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28756) - you deserved it (133740)

On 05/17/2009 at 7:40pm - animals - by sucks (man) - United States (Georgia)



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