flyfallfadeaway

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flyfallfadeaway

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 5 September 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 9412
  • Number of comments : 43
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About flyfallfadeaway : "what are you gonna be when you grow up?"

dead, and so are you.

flyfallfadeaway's page activity

Visits<b>pyromaniac9</b> - the 11/29/2016 at 3:56pm<b>Chibster</b> - the 07/16/2016 at 3:18pm<b>ratman775</b> - the 10/07/2015 at 1:55pm<b>Zyssii</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 3:05am<b>Raxy</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 10:45pm<b>delfino1604</b> - the 02/15/2015 at 8:02pm<b>dimos4ever</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 3:58am<b>moliknz</b> - the 06/14/2014 at 7:08pm<b>KK3137</b> - the 01/31/2014 at 2:30pm<b>eide74</b> - the 12/24/2013 at 10:59am<b>vikings63</b> - the 12/01/2013 at 1:40am<b>LazyBoy1710</b> - the 11/07/2013 at 7:24pm<b></b> - the 03/10/2011 at 1:08am<b>kell710</b> - the 05/17/2009 at 11:21pm<b>hyalophobia</b> - the 05/17/2009 at 3:21pm<b>Timillionare</b> - the 05/17/2009 at 1:51pm<b>tsalaverria</b> - the 05/07/2009 at 7:53pm<b>iluvpink02</b> - the 05/03/2009 at 3:02pm

flyfallfadeaway's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

flyfallfadeaway's favorite FMLs

Today, I parked my car on the street to go to the gym. When I came back my car was blocked by a parade of people. I turned to a shop worker smoking a cigarette and said "Jesus! What the hell is going on?" I got many strange looks. It was a Good Friday parade lead by a local church. FML

by Anonymous / 04/11/2009 at 10:52pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Transportation

Today, my fiancé's parents visited. I keep chickens for their eggs, and his parents own a farm, so we had a connection. They told us to leave the house while they cooked us dinner. When we returned, we faced two steaming plates of chicken. My chickens. They had names. FML

by lanbon182 / 04/10/2009 at 1:11am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I was bored at my job at Home Depot. I got a bar code tattoo 3 weeks ago and thought it would be funny to scan it. I'm a $5.98 160z claw hammer. FML

by tool / 04/09/2009 at 2:03am / United States (Nevada) / Work

Today, the phone rang so I went to answer it. No one was there. A minute later the phone rang again and no one answered so I assumed it was a telemarketer or a prank so I started swearing uncontrollably in rage. Turns out it was my crush calling to ask me out, but she was too nervous to ask. FML

by skmusic / 04/09/2009 at 1:04am / Canada (Manitoba) / Love

Today, while teaching my kindergarten class, I had a feeling I was starting my period again. A boy in the class asked me what a period was. Stressing over my own, I briefly told him it's a woman's time of the month when they have mood swings. He was asking about the dot at the end of a sentence. FML

by anonymous / 04/09/2009 at 12:53am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I was having a horrible day. I was laying on the couch, crying, when my dog came up on the couch to console me. I was thinking about how great it was to have a dog, because they're there for you when no one else is. As I was sobbing, I heard something. My dog farted into my mouth. Twice. FML

by BadBreath / 04/08/2009 at 11:43pm / United States (Minnesota) / Animals

Today, on the train, I got excited when I suddenly noticed I had a missed call and voicemail from a boy I liked. With a grin on my face, I told my friend. My dad overheard and said, "oh sweetie, he probably had the wrong number." The voicemail was blank. I texted him. The call was an accident. FML

by lyssanthamum / 04/08/2009 at 10:35pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, at lunch I was running to my group's table with my friend. She accidentally tripped me, and I slid across the café floor face first on my belly. The whole cafeteria was silent. They then broke out in hysterics when the head janitor ran up to me and yelled 'SAFE!' like a baseball umpire. FML

by eun / 04/08/2009 at 9:42pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to the doctor's office because my wife and I were having some fertilization problems. As I removed my pants, the doctor simply looked at my penis and said "mhm." My wife laughed the whole way home. FML

by manlyman / 04/05/2009 at 9:32am / United States (Virginia) / Health

Today, my boyfriend came over for dinner, but couldn't eat because he had just gotten his tongue pierced. My grandpa heard this, winked at my boyfriend and said "Can't eat now, but I bet that's all you'll be doing in a few weeks..." My super protective father was sitting right next to him. FML

by Anonymous / 03/24/2009 at 6:41am / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, I had my car stolen. When the police found it, pretty much everything inside was missing. For some reason, I had left 6 pairs of shoes in my back seat. Whoever stole my car thought it would be funny to take one shoe from each pair. I now own 6 unmatched shoes and my car smells like sex. FML

by proudestmonkey / 03/24/2009 at 1:44am / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy

Today, I was swimming in the ocean, not too far off shore. I had asked my mom to come in, but she was afraid of the water because fish had nipped at her toes or something back in the day. I told her there was nothing to fear. I ended up getting stung in the balls by a Jelly fish. FML

by The_HML / 03/23/2009 at 10:48pm / United States (Maryland) / Holidays

Today, my 11 year old brother walked in on me sitting on my boyfriend's ass and giving him a back massage. He tilted his head a little and then said "Aren't you guys doing it wrong? Isn't he supposed to be on top?" My boyfriend laughed and gave him a high-five. FML

by SLA / 03/23/2009 at 7:12pm / United States (Maryland) / Intimacy

Today, it's my birthday. My mom decided to wake me up by having our new, previously stray, cat thrown on top of me. I was awoken to two claws ripping across my face which needed 16 stitches to fix. Happy Birthday. FML

by birthdayfun / 03/23/2009 at 6:46pm / United States (Texas) / Animals

Today, I had an anxiety attack when I was hanging out with my boyfriend. He pulled me close to him and I started to feel better, until he put my hand down his pants and around his penis and said, "Here! Try this to take your mind off it." FML

by Marian / 03/23/2009 at 3:37pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy