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flockz

Offline (the 07/19/2015 at 9:56pm) | Search for a member

flockz

27Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 5 September 1990 (25 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 14733
  • Number of comments : 2058
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 60 posted

About flockz : i'm a dick. are you offended by me? aw sorry ouch FYL for sure. dump me then sue me. you deserve better. shit happens.
sirinz.org (best FML comments)

not giving a fuck is an art.

Favorite FMLers:
-Iamnotmyself
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-perdix
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flockz's page activity

Visits<b>chuka81</b> - 10 hours ago<b>The12thPaladin</b> - the 02/09/2016 at 12:00pm<b>TheAspieDork</b> - the 02/06/2016 at 11:12pm<b>jesswoo</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 9:32pm<b>big_sam1991</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 5:05pm<b>jsb1426</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 1:32pm<b>twitchywaffles</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 12:46am<b>Pokefinch27</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 11:25pm<b>davisjenny81</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 4:35pm<b>Red_Curls1995</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 12:44pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 9:53am<b>nekozzzz</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 9:16am<b>tintarroja</b> - the 01/23/2016 at 9:40pm<b>Cyntha</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 11:40pm<b>Adamjohn82</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 3:28pm<b>Frozen_Flames</b> - the 01/18/2016 at 6:19am<b>Noelletakumi</b> - the 01/18/2016 at 12:29am<b>whysobeachy</b> - the 01/17/2016 at 11:52pm

Fucked!<b>twitchywaffles</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 6:46am<b>tintarroja</b> - the 01/24/2016 at 3:40am<b>Cyntha</b> - the 01/23/2016 at 5:41am<b>Noelletakumi</b> - the 01/18/2016 at 6:30am<b>arano</b> - the 11/22/2015 at 12:38am<b>Walmartian2015</b> - the 11/10/2015 at 5:48am<b>DEATHLORD</b> - the 10/24/2015 at 7:49pm<b>quazimozart</b> - the 10/22/2015 at 12:47am<b>nezumii</b> - the 08/12/2015 at 8:32pm<b>patts_</b> - the 07/09/2015 at 9:23pm<b>lagreeni</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 6:00am<b>pookleberry</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 9:22am<b>Ragatyme</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 12:41am<b>DarksideDoll</b> - the 04/26/2015 at 10:21pm<b>S13rra01257</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 4:10am<b>XmasaX</b> - the 04/21/2015 at 3:50am<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 3:44am<b>D_Word_Head</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 7:12pm

flockz's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

See all of flockz's badges

flockz's favorite FMLs

Today, feeling romantic and overwhelmed with love, I told my fiancée: "I don't know what I'd do without you." She replied: "Well, you'd wank". FML

#591
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27198) - you deserved it (5983)

On 12/25/2008 at 1:07am - intimacy - by Nicos - Sent from mobile version

Today, I bought "Angus, thongs and perfect snogging" on DVD. FML

#542
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8494) - you deserved it (27626)

On 12/18/2008 at 3:30am - misc - by Wickls - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I surprise my girlfriend by turning up at her flat on her twenty-fourth birthday. She gets up from the couch as I enter and I shout: "Tonight, my cock is going to stab you twenty-four times!" (Okay, that's not smart). That's when her father glances over from the couch and greets me. FML

#509
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12974) - you deserved it (64902)

On 12/13/2008 at 10:58pm - intimacy - by Mateo - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was performing the classic 69 position with my girlfriend. I wasn't able to control it : I farted right into her nose. FML

#391
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49154) - you deserved it (26647)

On 11/25/2008 at 11:43pm - intimacy - by USSEYL - United Kingdom (Oxfordshire)

Today, I was making love with my girlfriend and my landline rang. Obviously, I let it go to voicemail. At the very moment I was about to cum, I heard my mum's voice on my voicemail: "Hi sweetheart!" FML

#337
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47725) - you deserved it (4687)

On 11/18/2008 at 11:58pm - intimacy - by Gwayhir - Sent from mobile version

Today, after a party, I brought a girl to the flat I share with my 2 best friends. While we are doing it, she asks me "You're not afraid your friends could hear us?". The only answer that spontaneously came out of my mouth: "Don't worry, they're used to it". FML

#76
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19473) - you deserved it (86712)

On 10/27/2008 at 12:57am - intimacy - by Daemon - Sent from mobile version

Today, I woke up and switched on the TV. The first thing I saw was a picture of a wanted rapist, who looks just like me. I'm afraid to leave home. FML

#8
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (315250) - you deserved it (31365)

On 10/13/2008 at 4:20am - misc - by mehdi -



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