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flockz

5Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 5 September 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 12604
  • Number of comments : 2058
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 60 posted

About flockz : i'm a dick. are you offended by me? aw sorry ouch FYL for sure. dump me then sue me. you deserve better. shit happens.
sirinz.org (best FML comments)

not giving a fuck is an art.

Favorite FMLers:
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flockz's page activity

Visits<b>papygeorges</b> - 10 hours ago<b>moneymuffen</b> - 20 hours ago<b>melpower</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 6:14am<b>jessamaryann</b> - the 01/22/2015 at 9:03am<b>lone_ninja</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 11:20am<b>rjt93</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 4:37am<b>Random4Dayz</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 7:12pm<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 6:53am<b>Ayoomoofie</b> - the 01/15/2015 at 9:23pm<b>RageWolf16</b> - the 01/13/2015 at 1:21am<b>TheWiseWolf</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 3:31pm<b>crimsonprodigy</b> - the 01/08/2015 at 12:53pm<b>evilamoebaattack</b> - the 01/08/2015 at 2:29am<b>Wondermage</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 12:36am<b>sky413</b> - the 01/04/2015 at 11:50pm<b>poncho55</b> - the 01/02/2015 at 1:29pm<b>TTesla</b> - the 01/01/2015 at 7:18pm<b>abattior</b> - the 12/30/2014 at 4:22am

Liked!<b>papygeorges</b> - 4 hours ago<b>RageWolf16</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 3:09pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 11/14/2014 at 3:42am<b>wannabefratguy94</b> - the 10/15/2014 at 6:07pm<b>Iamnotmyself</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 4:38am

flockz's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

See all of flockz's badges

flockz's favorite FMLs

Today, feeling romantic and overwhelmed with love, I told my fiancée: "I don't know what I'd do without you." She replied: "Well, you'd wank". FML

#591
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22715) - you deserved it (5408)

On 12/25/2008 at 1:07am - intimacy - by Nicos - Sent from mobile version

Today, I bought "Angus, thongs and perfect snogging" on DVD. FML

#542
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7050) - you deserved it (23656)

On 12/18/2008 at 3:30am - misc - by Wickls - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I surprise my girlfriend by turning up at her flat on her twenty-fourth birthday. She gets up from the couch as I enter and I shout: "Tonight, my cock is going to stab you twenty-four times!" (Okay, that's not smart). That's when her father glances over from the couch and greets me. FML

#509
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10831) - you deserved it (59299)

On 12/13/2008 at 10:58pm - intimacy - by Mateo - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was performing the classic 69 position with my girlfriend. I wasn't able to control it : I farted right into her nose. FML

#391
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44644) - you deserved it (24395)

On 11/25/2008 at 11:43pm - intimacy - by USSEYL - United Kingdom (Oxfordshire)

Today, I was making love with my girlfriend and my landline rang. Obviously, I let it go to voicemail. At the very moment I was about to cum, I heard my mum's voice on my voicemail: "Hi sweetheart!" FML

#337
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42756) - you deserved it (4152)

On 11/18/2008 at 11:58pm - intimacy - by Gwayhir - Sent from mobile version

Today, after a party, I brought a girl to the flat I share with my 2 best friends. While we are doing it, she asks me "You're not afraid your friends could hear us?". The only answer that spontaneously came out of my mouth: "Don't worry, they're used to it". FML

#76
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17869) - you deserved it (82899)

On 10/27/2008 at 12:57am - intimacy - by Daemon - Sent from mobile version

Today, I woke up and switched on the TV. The first thing I saw was a picture of a wanted rapist, who looks just like me. I'm afraid to leave home. FML

#8
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (290489) - you deserved it (28329)

On 10/13/2008 at 4:20am - misc - by mehdi -



Idan Schneider's illustrated FML

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  • The Best of the Worst #11
  • Yes, we're late. We've been doing stuff, the New Year and our birthday party got in the way, but there's no excuse. So, we're sorry for not churning out another Best of the Worst in due…

Wednesday 28 January 2015

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