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flipflop97's favorite FMLs
Today, my mom and I heard a thump from inside the coat closet. I opened the door, and something fell on me. My mom, who was behind me, screamed, closed the laundry room door, and ran into the garage, leaving me to face the alleged attacker. It was the vacuum. FML
by Anonymous / 09/24/2011 at 12:15pm / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous
Today, I had a science test. A question asked, "What is the first stage of photosynthesis?" I didn't know, so just trying to be light-hearted, I wrote, "The plant must first believe in itself." My teacher didn't think it was funny, and gave me detention for insulting her intelligence. FML
by Anonymous / 09/22/2011 at 12:17pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by agent_awesome / 09/21/2011 at 11:25am / United Kingdom / Animals
by rene / 08/22/2011 at 12:46pm / United States (Texas) / Transportation
by Bobby ray slice / 08/21/2011 at 8:03pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous
by RensM / 08/20/2011 at 5:54am / New Zealand (Auckland) / Miscellaneous
by anonymous22kittylicklick / 08/20/2011 at 12:44am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by TuteSweet / 08/12/2011 at 2:17am / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous
by MissArizona / 08/08/2011 at 10:12am / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was home alone, and enjoying my freedom decided to walk around naked blaring my radio. What my mother forgot to tell me before she left was that a guy was coming to fix our dish washer today. Imagine our mutual surprise as I danced around the kitchen while getting a drink. FML
by youjustsuck / 07/25/2011 at 2:07pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
by SCREWED / 07/15/2011 at 2:25am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
Today, my girlfriend, who is very self conscious about her body, finally decided to have sex with me. She told me to wait a few minutes, so I did. I stripped and turned around to find her in a one-piece swimsuit, with a hole cut out of the crotch. FML
by Anonymous / 07/13/2011 at 1:02am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
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- Today, and since forever, my boyfriend talks in his sleep. Last night, he told me, “I like you very… Today, I’m in Mexico for an internship. I was at a party when a drunk guy harangued me, calling me… Today, straight after we had sex, my boyfriend went to the bathroom. He stayed in there for a long…