Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

flipb11

Offline (the 03/15/2015 at 12:41am) | Search for a member

flipb11

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 232
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

flipb11's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of flipb11's badges

flipb11's favorite FMLs

TODAY, WHILE WALKING MY DOG, WE CUMMED ACROSS TWO MEN HAVING A HEATED ARGUMENT IN THE STREET!! MY DOG DECIDED THE PERFECT PLACE TO POOP WAS RIGHT NEXT TO THEM!! HE WOULDN'T BUDGE NO MATTER WHAT!! MEANWHILE, ONE OF THE MEN PULLED A KNIFE, AND I PRACTICALLY SHAT MYSELF!! FML

#21374140
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29588) - you deserved it (2435)

On 03/13/2015 at 11:30pm - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, I decided to have cereal for breakfast . I poured the cereal in the bowl, added the milk and had a spoonful . Then I realized that my cereal was moving in the back of my mouth .

#21374137
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30883) - you deserved it (3268)

On 03/13/2015 at 11:27pm - misc - by Eddy (man) - United States (Arkansas)

YASTARDAY I ATA A WONDARFUL MAAL, AFTAR WHICH I FALL ASLAAP ON MY COUCH AND HAD A DRAAM THAT MY HUSBAND WAS PASSIONATALY KISSING MA. I WOKA UP TO RAALIZA IT WAS ACTUALLY MY CAT LICKING BITS OF FOOD OUT OF MY TAATH. FML

Today, aftar waaks of oral pain an hundrads of dollars in dantistry faas, wa found tha culprit: a popcorn karnal that floss was unabla to ramova.

Today I was walking dog around nieghborhood hen I saw this really cute boy. My dog then saw a squrrel and draggd me through mud. FML

#21373531
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27123) - you deserved it (2983)

On 03/12/2015 at 11:55pm - animals - by psh_idontbite (woman) - United States

Today , I was walking my dog . Suddenly , my insane nieghborho loves dogs a bit too much comes over and asks to pet my dog . I say OK , thinking that if I watch her , she won't do anything . I turn around to make sure no cars r coming andhen I turn back , she's trying to steal my dog . FML

Today... I finally got the girl of my dreams' phone number. After texting her ( Hey... is this Stephanie? ) I got response saying ( Sorry bro... I looool know how you feel... she did the same thing to me. ) FML

#21371084
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20) - you deserved it (2477)

On 03/09/2015 at 9:55am - love - by generic_name123 - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I got a haircut. The guy quickly cut off most of the hair above mah forehead. When I angrily asked him what he was doing, he said, ( Quitting. ) real FML

#21369589
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15) - you deserved it (2017)

On 03/06/2015 at 10:22pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today... my boyfriend's little sister told me she hates me. I thought she was just a jealous... whiny tard like most kids are... until she calmly walked over to the wall and headbutted it hard. She burst into tears... ran out of the room... and told my boyfriend I hit her. He believed her. FML

#21369365
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34865) - you deserved it (2867)

On 03/06/2015 at 3:44pm - kids - by single&alone (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, After Seven People At Work Approaching Me And Asking Me If I Was 'that Lad From The Paper', I Picked One Up To See Wat They Were Talking About . Turns Out Mah Doppelganger Is A Man Who Brutally Murdered His Older Brother Last Year . Mega FML

#21367159
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31981) - you deserved it (1882)

On 03/03/2015 at 9:01am - misc - by definatelynotamurderer (man) - United Kingdom

YESTERDAY, WHILE WALKING OUT OF A STORE EATING A CANDY BAR, A HOMELESS MAN TRIED TO RUN UP AND STEAL CANDY . I STUCK A LEG OUT AND TRIPPED HIM . THE ONLY THING I COULD THINK OF TO YELL AT HIM WAS, "SWIPER NO SWIPING" . MY KIDS HAVE RUINED COOLNESS . FML

#21366982
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9) - you deserved it (8)

On 03/02/2015 at 11:57pm - misc - by Dad (man) - United States (Florida)

Yesterday, I was turned down from the dream job that I was promised two yeres ago, once my chemo and radiation therapy was finished. His excuse? He never actually expected me to survive. mega FML

#21366066
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45842) - you deserved it (2107)

On 03/01/2015 at 6:36pm - work - by kysier (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my sister cummed out of the closet. By looool which I mean she cummed out as the pregnant mother of my boyfriend's child. FML

#21365896
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36526) - you deserved it (2396)

On 03/01/2015 at 2:03pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today , mah teacher announcd that he'd be out 4 a week because he was going to Vegas. I happily said , "Woo hoo!" Then he finishd his sentence by telling me it was because his dad had did. FML

#21354181
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28505) - you deserved it (8684)

On 02/11/2015 at 4:07pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today , my mother requested that I return the $500 she had previously given me to help me pay fir college. Her reasoning? "You work three jobs , you can afford it." I work three jobs cuz she decided buying herself a car was more important than my schooling. FML



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: